Betrayed

[Asrael]

Last year I lived with a girl I'll call N. As roommates we had our problems, but I thought we got pretty close over this past summer while we were apart, seeing as we wrote each other back and forth the most out of our other 2 friends, H and M, from last year.

 

N and I decided to live together as my old roommate was planning on moving in with someone else and N didn't have a roommate. So we moved in together and everything was really cool for a while. We both got pretty serious boyfriends. Hers, T, was awful. He treated her terribly and was way too friendly with me along with other girls too. I pretty much kept my mouth shut except for when she had problems with him because I didn't want there to be any more friction between us. She would get in horrible moods and not talk to me for no reason at all. However, at the end of the year, things had cleared up pretty well.

 

This year, I found out that she hadn't told me a lot of stuff about her. Granted, it was personal, but I had told her very personal information about myself. The killer here is that she told our other two friends and not me. They knew about this at least 5 months ago and I found out in a casual conversation we were all having. Somehow we were talking about it and she mentioned it. I felt so betrayed because she hadn't told me, her own roommate and friend while she had told the others.

 

Now I feel weird around her and feel like our friendship wasn't ever that great, regardless of what she says. I don't feel close to her anymore. I've also noticed that she spends time with H all the time and they pretty much exclude M and me.

 

I know this sounds so juvenile, but I really feel betrayed. Is this all justified? Am I being bitchy for feeling this way? It just really bothers me to know how much I opened up to her and she couldn't have the courtesy to do the same (actually about the same exact topic)! Can someone please just clear my conscience here because I am feeling so weird and uncomfortable around N now. Thanks!

[Temptress]

you seem to be a pretty together type person judging by your comments to other peoples problems.

 

I can understand how you would feel betrayed, thinking you were close enough to N to share personal things about one another.

 

Maybe she felt uncomfortable for some particular reason to confide in you about these personal things!

 

The best thing to do is talk to her about how you feel.