debbiB Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 I have posted on the regular separation and divorce but this is where my post needs to be....I was hit by my husband 2 days ago when we were arguing...he hit me with his fist and gave me a black eye....we have had many years of arguing and lots of verbal and emotional abuse to the point that i didn't think i could go on....but i stayed...i don't work and have kids at home and thought; well i can't do that and then the church i am going to was against me leaving him but how do you stay with someone who is destroying everything inside of you....tears out your heart; rips up your dreams and makes you think that everything you do is wrong....I don't want to be that kind of example to my children....ending my marriage is the only thing i can do. I am glad yal are out there to listen...thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
lilbo Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 Is he the kind of man that wont want to talk it out? If he is hitting you in the face that is very serious like I read before murder victims dont wake up 1 day and know thats the day they are going to die. This isnt petty violence it sound very serious and dangerous you need to look out for yourself and your children's safety. I dont know the whole background but he sounds violent I know it can be hard for women to seek help even if you love him you need to think of your life and your childrens overall. Have you ever went to a battered women's sheltar? You might want to check it out. I know this advise can sound easy but I know it is not a easy thing to decide. Hope you stay safe keep contacting us letting us know how you are, contact police if needed. stay safe *hugs* Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 Leave him, Debbie and don't look back! The church doesn't have to live with him and take his punches in the eye. Your children will resent you for staying with a man like him someday. Do it for them at least. I've been in an unhappy marriage and divorced and let me tell you, my children were unhappy whenever I was. They even loved their father but never wanted me to get back together with him, although there was no abuse or too many fights going on except for a few times (both physical and verbal). I am now in a new marriage and my kids are very happy. They love their new dad so much, they jump on him with kisses and hugs all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 getting out of a toxic unhappy situation can be the most uplifting healthy thing a person can do.. It sounds like your relationship has run its course and there seems to be no more turns ahead except bailing.. Because the relationship has taking the turn to physical violence then you should leave.. It doesn't matter how much you have contributed to that event.. what matters is that it happened and if you couple that with the pattern of years of verbal/emotional abuse to/from you both then you need to realize that nothing good can come from staying.. It will only get worse from here on out.. Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 It's appalling that some churches will defend 'the institution of marriage' even in instances like this! Forget what your church said; neither you nor your children will have healthy lives if you stay so congratulations on your decision to end it. Link to post Share on other sites
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