emceelaszlo Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 Aight so there is this girl with whom ive been friendly with. This year she went through a tough breakup, around feb-march i think, anyways, she kinda went into a hyper depression funk and i was the person who was watching over her. Ok, so during her whole turbulent relationship thing, one day she came to me and said "me and jacob are taking a break" so i joked "why not be my gf then" her response "ok" and we kissed. The next day, valentines day i bought her a rose, and apparently that was the wrong thing to do, and i dunno it was kinda awkward and that day was forgotten yesterday im walking down this street with onna my campers from the local daycare and she asks if i want a ride. For liability issues i declined and once more.... there was a kiss, i guess a kiss goodbye, but are those normally on the lips? That night she called me and invited me over to watch a movie. Now, when im watching a movie with a girl or no one, im there to watch the movie u got me. we kinda sat on either side of the coach and after one or two attempts of getting closer to her i just gave up and watched the movie. Now she's been into my buddy recently but i know he doesnt really like her. Last night she told me she kinda realized this and has felt less attracted too him, and he had ditched her @ sum party so she was pissed @ him. Now frankly, maybe its me, i kinda like this girl, i say kinda b/c i dont know if id want a relationship vs a "Friends into 'Friends with benefits'". Frankly IMO i think FWB would be perfect, there is a mutual sexual tension b/w us and it cuts the hassle of a relationship I brought up FWB with her about 2months ago over AIM and she responded that it would ruin the friendship. I havent mentioned it again, and im sure she knows that im physically attracted to her. So am i getting mixed messages? frankly she never calls me but yesterday after a on the lip kiss she then invites me over for movie and popcorn. Am i reading to much into this? Or does she perhaps entertain similar attraction to me? Id love any and all help, usually i get 1 or 2 responses to all of my posts but if ppl could all post their opinions id dig it thanks Link to post Share on other sites
notmakingsense Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 She either is simply just in to you as a friend, or she's testing the waters a little. Either way, in my opinion, she isn't in to you enough to be a gf, and doesn't have enough hots for you to get sexual. The kisses don't mean much unless they are steamy ones. I'd simply just start dating other women. If she is really in to you, this will kick her into action and she'll start going after you (trust me). If she isn't that in to you -- well, you'll be starting to have more fun with the other women anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 I won't tell you what you want to hear....IME FWB never work out. It usually ends badly. One or the other person, after having regular sex, gets some kind of feelings of attachment that lead to jealousy when the non attached party starts seriously dating someone else. I've lost a few friends because of this. One guy friend that I became FWB with, it ended with a few weeks because he said he thought I was getting too attached (I think because we were hooking up almost every day, what can I say, I have a massively high sex drive...he mistakenly thought it was because I wanted to hang out with him all the time, but being FWB I didn't really care to work on our communicatin skills) Anyways although we continued to hang out occassionally it was awkward after that, and when I started dating a guy seriously he got all weird and jealous and wouldn't introduce himself to my new BF! a**h***. So I stopped being friends with him and he's such a little bitch whenever I run into him. I think it's because he's jealous. If I were you i would stick with dating other women, and real relationships. FWB never work out. They just give you short term, awkward sexual satisfaction that ends up hurting one or the other person. JMO, though, take it with a grain of salt. Link to post Share on other sites
dancehead Posted June 23, 2006 Share Posted June 23, 2006 I will echo the advice of notmakingsense. If she was that into you then she wouldn't have been after your friend. Go dating. I read something today in a magazine problem page from a girl who wanted to have sex with this guy (who made his love clear) but didn't want the guy as a bf because she didn't fancy him enough. The advice offered was something like this: "Never offer sex to anyone that you can't love back - Its unfair on them and unfair on you. Save yourself for someone whom you can return those feelings to." I think thats profound. Friends with benefits is such a bad idea, Just read my experiences and that'll put you off. Link to post Share on other sites
vi_pn_babe25 Posted June 24, 2006 Share Posted June 24, 2006 Oh no another FWB relationship.....it's best you don't even start one....because all it ends up to be is a drama filled mess or always wondering what "could be". Trust me I've been with my f buddy for a year now, we actually met the same night we slept together for the first time, and it's STILL going....and going, pretty much the same old thing. I guess we haven't gotten sick of each other YET. Link to post Share on other sites
monkey00 Posted June 25, 2006 Share Posted June 25, 2006 seems like a rocky situation to me. Jumping into a relationship with a girl who just broke up isnt exactly ideal. for all you know she still cares a great deal about him. with this break, it's the perfect time for her to experience other guys and still be emotionally attached to the ex. it was far too soon for you to ask her to be your gf, and give her a rose the next on v-day. girls dont like a desperate guy, they want someone they can work for. ime , generally fwb doesnt work out. Exactly how far the girl is willing to let this fwb go, or how much she wants to limit it is entirely up to her, why? because you want it more than she does. Even if you're not in a relationship or fwb with her she could care less if you came at the beck of her call. honestly, who doesnt mind keeping someone around to stroke their ego? my advice is if you want a gf, and dont want your feelings hurt. forget about her and move on. there are plenty of single girls around with little to no baggage. Link to post Share on other sites
Author emceelaszlo Posted June 26, 2006 Author Share Posted June 26, 2006 lol, yah finding a gf is difficult too.... Link to post Share on other sites
little_girl Posted July 1, 2006 Share Posted July 1, 2006 i don't agree! i think if you go into the relationship with exactly what is expected you will not be hurt or expect any more! maybe i'm just a cold heartless bitch but mine has worked & i knew from the beginning what to expect! Link to post Share on other sites
Da_1_n_OnlyN3na Posted July 4, 2006 Share Posted July 4, 2006 i dont really like the whole FWB thing.. to me its kind of an insult...because if you dont want to be with the gurl why mess with her at all... she might get more in to you and for what??? its like youre playn the friends with benefits thing for YOUR pleasure so you can feel good and at the same time you dont have to be in a relationship....for that go find yourself a s3x buddy or a slut as i call it...lol no offence to you but i hate when guys use girls... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 6, 2006 Share Posted July 6, 2006 umm, what's the difference between being friends with someone and being a FWB? Link to post Share on other sites
Da_1_n_OnlyN3na Posted July 6, 2006 Share Posted July 6, 2006 a friend is a buddy someone who u hang out wit have fun and stuff like that... a FWB is someone you are friends with but you act or do things a couple woul do but without any commitment... Link to post Share on other sites
little_girl Posted July 10, 2006 Share Posted July 10, 2006 i agree~~friends are just that~~someone to hang out with & have fun~~but an FWB~~is for more than just hanging out~~but you have to make the rules of what is expected beforehand~~ Link to post Share on other sites
stronger_daily Posted July 11, 2006 Share Posted July 11, 2006 It sounds like this girl might be a bit vulnerable. You should probably back off and date women who are ready to be in a relationship. As for mixed signals, I'm not sure why kissing you and then inviting you over to a movie means it's mixed. Are you thinking that by inviting you over she wanted something sexual from you? If you do then you might really want to back off for her sake and for yours. If you value your friendship then just be friends with her until you're sure you both want more. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 18, 2006 Share Posted July 18, 2006 idunnoif im just emphasising what has already been said before but i guess ucan t stres itenough friends with benefits ruin the friendshipruin a person and its a downright waste of time it ****ed me upfor round 3 months before i could get myself to forget the person who had been my best guy friend and the onlyremedy was to mentallyerase him from my life and detach myself in order not to get hurt anymore dunt get into fwb unless u dunt mind gettin hurt Link to post Share on other sites
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