Is it normal to not have hobbies?

[Guest]

Ok this is silly, but is it normal for someone to not have any hobbies? I have tonnes of interests but husband doesn't. I find it strange but he's content to watch tv only. Is this normal?

 

Guest

[Outcast]

I'm sure there are tons of people who do nothing but sit in front of the tube. That's probably why there are so many obese people. I don't know why anyone would settle for being that boring, but some do.

[Pink Amulet]

It is easy to develop hobbies. Instead of complaining about it- encourage his hobbies! Say why don't we *insert activity here* this weekend?

[sugarplum]

Ok this is silly, but is it normal for someone to not have any hobbies? I have tonnes of interests but husband doesn't. I find it strange but he's content to watch tv only. Is this normal?

 

Guest

 

Unfortunately, I have a husband just like this. He watches ESPN all night, every night, while watching coverage of something else on the internet! My friends suggest that this lack of interest in other things may be depression - I dont know. His weight has gone up though too. I thought that would be enough to make a difference, but it didn't. He complains about being overweight while sitting on the couch watching TV! I told him once, why do you spend your time watching others engaged in activity, instead of being engaged in activity yourself???? No answer, I only heard crickets chirping! Just go on with what you like to do. Forcing it might make it worse, but be sure to invite him in the things you do.

[ronnieromance]

I'd like to hear his take on it. I mean, what constitutes a hobby to some may be nothing or "silly" to others.

 

Like me, I like cars. I am a drummer aswell, but I don't consider it a "hobby". It's more of a habit. I'm really trying to make a career out of it. Anyway, my mother, has never considered my love affair with the automobile to be worthy of the title "hobby. She would, however call my musicianship a "hobby". I find that a little derogatory as I take it much more seriously. My girlfriends have, however accepted things in the way I view them. I guess it can be tinged by your views on the subject.

 

Of course, you may be completely objective and have a point. I don't know. Just another angle to consider.

 

 

-R-

[bab]

I'd like to hear his take on it. I mean, what constitutes a hobby to some may be nothing or "silly" to others.

 

 

 

Yeah, but don't you think that watching TV is a long way from a hobby? Or are you saying that he does have interests other than watching TV that we aren't hearing about here? I could maybe see that.

 

To the OP-

Maybe there are some hobbies the two of you could do together. Walks, gardening, reading, dance lessons. Hmmm....

[basscatcher]

I don't think I have any active hobbies at the present time in my life.

 

I use to have a few but they disipitated when I lost my partner to do them with.

 

I have many many interests but I dont' dabble in them because of a lack of time, energy and lack of companionship to share them with.

 

The closest thing to calling anything a hobby in my life right now is going out Friday and Saturday nights dancing. other then that nothiing.

 

Can LS be called a hobbie? I think I'm addicted to it!!

 

How about people. I like interaction with people. (must be why I like LS.)

 

Past hobbies:

fishing

crocheting

soaps

reading

cooking

painting

drawing

abstract art

collecting

bicyling

walking

hiking

movies

crossword puzzles

Pogo.com

weekend road trips exploring

[JackJack]

Personally I couldn't imagine not having some type of hobby. Of course thats just me, but maybe it comes from the fact that I have always had one. Plus when I was a child my mother and father both told me how important it was to have a least one hobby or interest in something other than sitting in front of the tv all the time. My fiancee is the same way she too has several hobbies. I enjoy what hobby I have becasue I couldn't stand to have to much idle time on my hands. Now my fiancee's sister, she has no hobbies other than shopping, sitting infront of the tv and computer. If you want to call them hobbies I guess you could. My finacee's sister who has a daughter thats 5, she does the same things her mother does, tv, computer, shopping with her mom, and playing video games, all the time. I guess if thats their bag, so be it.

[Kenyth]

Watching TV, sports, movies, reading, video games, etc. can all be considered hobbies. Albiet boring ones. I have had a ton of hobbies. I only do one or two actively at a time, and I come back to others eventually. When one has babies, buys a new home, etc. your time intensive hobbies tend to go to the side. Home improvement, landscaping, and gardening become your major hobbies. When the children are a bit older, you can resurrect certain hobbies they might find interesting, such as fishing, swimming, scale models, model rocketry, or RC vehicles. When they get even older, you can play sports with them, play video games, do car work, computer building, science experiments, whatever. You can do things like gardening, wine tasting, gourmet food cooking, etc. with the wife. I keep certain hobbies, like video gaming, beer brewing or cigar smoking to myself. My wife recently started scrapbooking since the baby arrived and she loves it! Her first real hobby. If you want some mutual hobbies, you're going to have to get him interested. Other than that, it's a completely personal decision. Take the time he's watching sports to do hobbies of your own.

[luvtoto]

Maybe his hobby *is* watching TV. I don't have any hobbies either. When I come home from a long day at work, I either log on to the internet or watch TV. It helps me relax. (in between housework of course)

 

Hobbies are too damn expensive.

[a4a]

Is looking at porn a hobby?

 

As long as the person enjoys their activity be it TV or tracking B-ball stats.. I think it is a hobby for them.

[a4a]

Maybe his hobby *is* watching TV. I don't have any hobbies either. When I come home from a long day at work, I either log on to the internet or watch TV. It helps me relax. (in between housework of course)

 

Hobbies are too damn expensive.

 

Yes they can be expensive mine lil hobby runs me about $2,500 a month :eek: but you only live once

[jerbear]

Husband's hobby is couch potatoism?

 

Nothing wrong with being home watching tv. Now what did he like to do when you two were dating? Maybe try to redo some of those activities.

 

Some hobbies are not cheap but there are low cost ones like reading, walking, talking, cooking, etc...

[luvtoto]

Is looking at porn a hobby?

 

As long as the person enjoys their activity be it TV or tracking B-ball stats.. I think it is a hobby for them.

Exactly, a4a. I used to feel bad about not being "hobby minded". I've learned to accept that relaxing is my hobby. I'm a single mother of two kids. I don't have the time or money for much more.

 

I would love to antique. But, I don't have a truck to get the stuff home.

I would love to be a gourmet cook. But, I don't think anyone would eat the food in my house.

I would love to be a female motocross racer. But, I don't have the...well, I can't afford it.

I would love to be an interior designer. But, I can't afford it.

[SmokieWoman]

Hi,

 

I've got a real name now instead of 'Guest'. Thanks for all your replies. Husband and I didn't have any estabilished hobbies while we dated because we only dated for 5 months before getting married but we had talked a lot about how we would like to be as a couple together and it just hasn't turned out that way.

 

I've tried engaging him in anything I am interested in *and* told him that I would be happy to participated in any thing he wants to do, *and* told him 'Hey, feel free to do what you want even if you want to do it without me'. How's that for a green light? He didn't bite.

 

He's 59 years old (I'm 43) retired and spends his days either cutting the lawn, grocery shoping, laundry, watching the tv then nights he attends his aa meetings two nights a week for a couple of hours.

 

We have the luxury that he has a pension so I work part-time and am trying to get an embroidery/monograming business going. I've tried bringing him into the building of the business so we can do something together but his efforts are haphazard at best.

 

I love him but feel the tv is interfering in our marriage and could definately be called an addiction.

 

 

Any ideas?

 

Smokie Woman

[jerbear]

Welcome Smokiewoman

 

If the tv is in the bedroom, remove it. Move it somewhere else. Remove select electronics like radios, tv's, vcr's, etc.. unless it is for extra curricular bedroom activities.

 

He sounds like he is set in his ways and just wants to relax in his retirement.

 

Sounds like for you life began at 40 while for him it was couch potatoism. Since you two talked ever talk at another location? ie. dinner table, coffee house, or park?

[hotgurl]

I am the opposite I have too many hobbies & not enugh time. I told someone I need to retire so I can have time for my hobbies. Tv is such a time waster and it stresses me out the noise etc..

 

I agree with jerber get him out of the house and maybe he'll get out of his rut. I sounds like he is bored.

[Outcast]

It's really too bad that people decide 'retirement' means 'quitting living and sitting waiting to die'. He's not exactly ancient and could do a ton of things yet. Have you looked into whether he's depressed?

[FaithyBabe]

Hi,

 

 

retired and spends his days either cutting the lawn, grocery shoping, laundry, watching the tv then nights he attends his aa meetings two nights a week for a couple of hours.

 

I love him but feel the tv is interfering in our marriage and could definately be called an addiction.

 

 

Any ideas?

 

Smokie Woman

 

I think AA meetings for some are considered a hobby as is alcoholism. I think you should stop worrying about him and enjoy the fact he loves mowing grocery shopping and laundry.

its only my take on it tho , it aint gospel.

[arthur200]

I guess it depends how you define a hobby...

 

I've got a tonne of hobbies:

fishing

car tuning

home improvements

reading online forums about the above

building r/c planes

gardening

hitting the town with my drinking buddy

 

my missus doesn't have anything like that, but manages to fill her time up with all sorts of stuff that I don't see as a particularly fun / productive.

 

But it's her time, so.. as long as she's happy that's ok by me.

[CaterpillarGirl]

Maybe you should target your suggestions to his tv viewing choices. For instance, if he watches a lot of sports, buy a couple of tickets to a hockey/football/soccer/baseball game and take him out. If he is into cars, a lot of times, there are nearby car shows you two could explore. You get what I"m saying? At the very least, you might be able to induce him to go to the movies or something. Anything, to get out of the house and off the couch once in a while. Not that there is anything inherently bad with watching tv. I think it's relaxing once in a while, too. But every day? Hmmm...bad for your health.

[michelangelo]

and a recovering alcoholic.

 

I'd say he is doing great to be cutting the grass, doing laundry, grocery shopping,, and whatnot.

 

He's not hitting bars, ya know?

 

Does he engage in conversations with you?

 

Do you have a sex life?

 

Is he willing to do things with you?

 

I'm sure his energy level at 59 is a lot less than yours is at 43.

[SmokieWoman]

Wow everyone has given such great responses.

 

I think what it boils down to is that I want to do things with HIM without loosing his attention to some scene on the tv and I've tried everthing to make that happen. I am tired of living in our dank dark basement. Even walked to the basement buck naked but he says, 'Can we wait till after the news?'

 

He talks all through the shows about the show or anything else that is on his mind, he flicks from program to program in the commercials, often watching bits of three shows at once. He/we ALWAYS watch at least two shows at once - never just one show - always two. I've told him it makes my brain ache but he says it's crazy to waste time watching commercials so it's better to watch two shows at once. We definately have two different styles of tv watching. I like the commercials for bathroom breaks, or talking, he just talks through the shows, even the new ones he hasn't seen before.

 

But...since he's seen EVERYTHING many times over it's not uncommon that he flicks steadily for twenty minutes.

 

As I'm writing all this, a plan is forming in my mind. Summer is here, maybe I'll hide our tvs at a friends house for a week or two. He'll freak out BUT maybe if I tell him why I'm doing this he'll agree. After all...I would be doing it to IMPROVE our relationship and who can argue with that?

 

Sign me Smokie Woman ....feeling devious

[michelangelo]

I'm thinking Tivo would be perfect for you.

[bab]

As I'm writing all this, a plan is forming in my mind. Summer is here, maybe I'll hide our tvs at a friends house for a week or two. He'll freak out BUT maybe if I tell him why I'm doing this he'll agree. After all...I would be doing it to IMPROVE our relationship and who can argue with that?

 

Sign me Smokie Woman ....feeling devious

 

If you can get away with it without him getting really upset with you, I'd say do it!! We've gone completely TV less before, and it was wonderful. We now just have bunny ears and rarely ever turn on the TV. We do rent movies quite often, but no channel surfing with DVD's!