Guest Posted July 2, 2006 Share Posted July 2, 2006 been talking to a girl about 3 mo. mostly by e-mail. Usually at least 4x a week. Lately though, contact suddenly and drastically decreased. She has not contacted me in over a week. We have had absolutely no problems. No disagreements, no problems and our last exchange was typical, fun, and friendly. I called a week ago and left a message, then e-mailed after hearing nothing for a couple of days. I'm slightly concerned about her and just want to make sure she is ok, but I don't want be a nuisance, and I don't want her to think I'm needy. I need to add something. Right at the time the contact decreased, she broke up with her bf of about 10 mo. Do you think maybe she is just taking some time for herself? It makes me feel paranoid, like it is my fault, but I know I haven't done or said anything wrong. How long do I wait for a response before e-mailing or calling again? Part of me says don't ever call until I hear back, but another part says something could really be wrong or she didn't get my message. I'm really hoping it is just taking some time to get over the bf, but she is really making me feel like crap. Link to post Share on other sites
tearful_soul22 Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 If she's not replying or having the courtesy to get back to you after all the attempts you made, then i see no reason for you to hang on and wait. She's probably healing over the breakup with her other b/f, trying to gain back her independence, need her space, so forth..so on, which is what you should be doing too. You might try calling her one more time, text her, or email, just to see if she's all right and all that. If she doesn't communicate back, then it's time for N/C..take care and good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 It's always dangerous to assume, IMHO. Email or call her again and ask if she got your last message and if she's ok. Any number of things might have happened to prevent her from getting your last message (or you from getting her last message) and she may be sitting there thinking that you're the one not contacting her. Technology screws up often - my voicemail sometimes doesn't relay my messages until a day after they're received - so I'd suspect technical troubles before deciding that she's quit talking to me or has another guy or anything like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 I would send her one more email telling her you are there for her to talk to if she is having a hard time with her break up and express that you hope you did not contribute to it, that you are there for her if she needs someone to talk to. If in fact you are the cause of the break-up and now are not supporting her, she may grow to resent you and regret what has happened. Link to post Share on other sites
My_Other_I Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 I don't wanna sound weird or anything, but try to find out what's going on. Even if you turn out to be unwanted, at least you will have a piece of mind. I had lost touch with a dear friend of mine just like you did and never pursued farther after I hadn't heard from him for few weeks. I just assumed that he didn't want to talk for a while or that he was busy with his little ones, since he was going through custody battles. I found out last week that he had died few weeks ago. He got sick right around the time our contact had stopped The regrets are piercing my heart. There are too many ifs and too many wishes. The main wish remains the same; I wish I was more interested in the real reason why he never got back to me. She is probably just taking a break from you, but you never know. Link to post Share on other sites
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