Are you addicted to porn sites?

[Shell]

I would be interested to hear from anyone who is either addicted to porn sites, or is the partner of someone who is. I think my partner is, and want to try to help him but dont't know the best way to go about it- (though I do appreciate that he has to realise his problem for himself first), I also want to try to understand the problem. Any thoughts on this please would be welcome.

[JadeStar]

You might could do a search on loved ones who are addicted to porn. There are also websites that offer help and understanding/support for those who are involved with someone who is addicted to porn as well. IMO, I think theres a fine line between someone who occassionally views porn and someone who is addicted. Why do you feel he has a problem with it? Can you share with us what makes you feel he is?

 

 

 

 

Jade

[Shell]

I feel he is addicted because everytime I go out with my friends (occasional Friday nights into the city and to night clubs!) he is pleased I am going. He even takes me and picks me up (saves a lot of money for me!). However, when I check the computer the next day, i see absolutely loads of teen porn he has viewed, pics and vids.

 

He rejects advances from me and told me that it doesnt turn him on when i come on to him. (I have a pretty good body for my age). This may be a control thing on his part, but sex is just one sided. he satisfies himself and thats it. Makes me feel used. So we can only do it when he wants to and he is usually turned on before he even looks at me. That tells me that it isnt me turning him on, its something else.

 

I may be way off the mark here, but it doesnt feel good. He has a history of viewing porn. Lived at home before he lived with me - long list of sex sites in his favourites on his computer. Even accused ME of having a higher sex drive than him, which of course dampened my enthusiasm.

 

Was great when we first met (but then it always i!) he couldnt keep his hand off me and got an erection just by me walking past him! Now, i have to guess when he might want to. Usually preceeded by longer kissing. otherwise I get a few pecks on the lips and a goodnight.

 

 

By the way, i have tried to discuss this with him, but he says he just doesnt understand women!

[P1xie]

I may be way off the mark here, but it doesnt feel good. He has a history of viewing porn. Lived at home before he lived with me - long list of sex sites in his favourites on his computer. Even accused ME of having a higher sex drive than him, which of course dampened my enthusiasm.

 

Sounds to me he does have a high sex drive with his porn and "Self Love Seat".

 

I think porn is a problem if it effects people's sex life's. Or if someone needs it to get aroused before performing. Sorry folks no man or woman wants to be primed with porn before getting laid.

 

Basically you have to choose if you want it in your life or not. You can tell him you don't then he will have to choose whether he wants it in his life. Some will tell you it's no big deal but obviously it is a big deal or you wouldn't be posting her. Coming from a girl that has been through it.

 

Hope it turns out for the best.

[abitconfused]

I have been to some but rarely ever buy into any sites. If your single or not getting any I would say ok but if you have someone then there should be no reason for him to look else where. Maybe ask him what his fantasy is with it. Ask what exactly he is looking for.

[Elbereth]

Hi,

 

I agree with you. For what you said, I think he is an addict.

It won’t be easy, and he won’t stop even when he promise to do so. Even if he sees he is an addict, the next day he will forget and say to you that he doesn't understand women again.

This is a common addiction these days, thanks to the facilities of Internet. What happens to you is happening everywhere. And nobody wants to talk about it, because many people are involved in one way or another. So talking about it will make them question about themselves... and they don't want that.

When I first started looking for help about this matter on the net a few years ago, I couldn't find anything. Then I found a board for Porn and Sex addicts and their SO. And nowadays, you can find lots of boards and sites about it (fortunately).

Many divorces are because of it these days...

Unfortunately, no many psychologists are aware of the problem, or are involved in porn too, so be aware in the moment of finding counseling, or his/your psychologist will tell that you are a freak 'cause you don't watch porn as well or masturbated thinking in other guys.

 

Search for "porn addicts support board" at Ggl.

 

Good luck to you.

[Ross_K]

What's a self love seat?

[Poboy]

What's a self love seat?

 

ya me too was wondering

[Elbereth]

I don't know. But my best guess is that it's a j*rk drooling in front of the pc caught in his infant and narcisistic sex relationship (while supporting an industry that abuses and hurts people, and profits from abused people as well).

[Guest]

If he deletes his history, how are you to know he has surfed porn? What if he is just viewing it and not downloading it can you still tell he's looked at it? Does it hide somewhere on computer?

[Elbereth]

If I were you, I would NEVER provide men any information about how you found out that your partner was watching porn or jerking to it... They only learn how to hide it better, and the lie continues...

 

Good luck

[Sideburns]

I have been to some but rarely ever buy into any sites. If your single or not getting any I would say ok but if you have someone then there should be no reason for him to look else where. Maybe ask him what his fantasy is with it. Ask what exactly he is looking for.

I can't buy whatever it is you're selling.

 

I don't care who you are, if you're in a relationship living with a woman

I'm assuming you're a man, otherwise disregard this.

 

getting the regular there are certain truths:

1. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission
   
2. After awhile living together you better believe you're thinking about someone else (not always but you will at some point or another: both ways men and women both do it)
   
3. You're gonna watch porno and shake hands with the pope.

And the reason to watch porn...because it's there, it's just a means to an end, which is saturating your brain with dopamine.

 

I'm not meaning to sound like some compulisve masturbator, but I do know I am a cynical a-hole; I know that much about myself.

 

I just wanted to address the one comment, I'm not qualified to give advice on porn addiction. All I can do is offer up what I know, however little it may be about things I've experienced in life so far.

 

All things aside, I know women folk generaly don't like to think their man is crankin it whenever their not around, and that's reasonable and I can understand how it may upset them, but facts are facts and once inawhile it has to be done, but I think guys should be discreet cause noone likes to get caught pullin' their goalie.