Confusing ex!!!!!!!!

[Kitten]

I was with a guy who was the love of my life for a year nad I became pregnant with his child. Our relationship became a little shaky just before that. We wanted to get married and everything. we have been on and off for the past year, our daughter is now 6 months old. we broke up for what he said was for good about 2 months ago, he told me he didnt want to bring me down with him and he didnt want to see me cry anymore but he just didnt feel that "spark" he did when he first met me ( I thought that spark wasnt supposed to stay forever) so we should just move on with our lives, I was devastated at first but I seemed to have gotten over it for awhile there I still knew I missed and loved him but I knew that it was his wish and I had to love him enough to accept what his feelings were. He started coming over to my house and hanging out with me and her and kept finding excuses to be home when I was because he said he wanted to spend time with me. I told him he made his choice he would have to live with it, it kept escalating and last week he hugged me for like 10 minutes he just kept holding me, and now last night he kissed me. He told me not to take it personally and that it was for being a great mom. Now Im confused, he wants me to soend time with him on christmas and he kept asking if I had a boyfriend or not, he said he didnt care if I did then 5 minutes later he was asking if I did. I dont get this guy.

[Tony T]

I don't get him either.

 

If you're not interested in getting back with him, let him know that very clearly and do not allow him to be so mushy around you.

 

If you're open to another try, ask him what's up and get him to tell you just where his head's at.

 

Just don't get yourself into a situation where you get back together and then he slides back into the same way he used to be. That's the way it happens sometimes. Right now he may just be very vulnerable, especially with the holidays around us.

 

Good luck!

[Carrie]

The spark doesn't stay forever, because the spark isn't love or being in-love...it's more of a chemical rush. Once the spark goes (you realize the person is just human like everyone else), what keeps people around is because they love each other, are in-love with each other, and more importantly like the other person.

 

Another thing, how old is this guy? He may care for you, but may be too immature or young to handle the responsibility. He may have thought at one time he could do it and now feels that he sold himself short and needs more time for exploring other things. It doesn't sound like it's you or anything you've done, it's just the circumstance that you two are in - it can be scary if he's very young - for both of you. There's a lot of pressure and it can seem overwhelming and smothering. Unfortunately it's too late to avoid the responsibility of a child, and as long as the child's needs come first, that's really the important thing. As for the two of you working out, you'll just have to let him have his space to explore life and decide if you are the one he wants to be with in the long run. Having a child with someone isn't always a guarantee that a girl is going to keep a guy - just so long as he's there for his daughter is really what matters most.