Is it really always their fault, sometimes is not

[journalstar4]

I believe this is my second post here, haven't been here for a very long while. I been searching for this forum again and forgot the name, didn't know you could post again here.

 

I notice those who are trying to find better ways to cope with their anger tend to get bashed and people are more likely to say "Oh you're just a bad person, you'll never change", but YOU DON'T KNOW, it's not easy, esp. if you have words constantly coming back at you, from someone that was suppost to love you and take care of you. Though it wans't physical, emotional along with the verbal feels like you were being truck by a train and your bones are breaking.

 

One thing I can agree is that it is true you do suffer when that person finally leaves you for good and you wished you had known it and gotten hepled ealier that it is too late and you did love him/her. I'm also aware there is never an excuse for anyone hitting. At the time is was liek you couldn't find any way to release your frustration other than lashing on your partner for them to get the message. Some don't really mean to at all.

[Craig]

At the time is was liek you couldn't find any way to release your frustration other than lashing on your partner for them to get the message. Some don't really mean to at all.

Think about your life skills like a box of tools, the more different kinds of tools you have in your tool box the better job you can do. Think about the anger management courses you could take, the relationship and conflict management skills you could learn in courses and books. Then go out and do it, get yourself more tools to handle a situation and the next time it comes up, you won't only have ways of handling things that cause you pain and regret later.

 

Best wishes,

 

Craig

[Lollie72]

I

At the time is was liek you couldn't find any way to release your frustration other than lashing on your partner for them to get the message. Some don't really mean to at all.

 

 

You cannot control, cure or didn't cause it...get it, but you can contribute to it by aiding and abeding the fugative and letting them get away with being abusive. No one can stand up for you but you in the end!

[Outcast]

It doesn't matter if you don't mean to. What that means is that you are unable to control yourself when it's critical to do so. You can get help for this. It is NOT ok to do even if 'you don't mean to'.