Why get married?

[TattooedPrincess]

Marriage creates jobs. Think of the tens of thousands of dollars couples spend on a wedding. Flowers, caterers, gown purchases, tux rentals, limo rentals, honeymoon vacations, etc. etc.

 

And then the tens or hundreds of thousands spent on divorce lawyers.

 

So do your part for the GDP! Get married and divorced!

 

 

Marriage do not create jobs. People create BS jobs for all the glitz and galore. It is people choice however big they want to make a celebration which can be nothing but ridiculous in my book but that isn't what a marriage is about.

 

Any bride who has to become bridezela is not in it for the marriage and shouldn't be getting married in the first place because people like that is so fixated on the fact how the big party is going to be pulled off.

 

If your concern is about the party then you don't need to be getting married

[Outcast]

I'm just not convinced there are that many people out there who are capable of falling - or would permit themselves to fall - in love to that extent.

 

Seems the world's full of scared rabbits. Too bad, really, when you've only got one go-round.

[ladyinwaiting]

Why get married? I used to ask myself that question quite a bit. I was pretty much of the view that it was pointless unless you wanted to have kids. After all, where I live you get the same rights after living together for a number of years anyway. I was happy with that.

 

But then, much to my surprise, I got engaged. I know understand a little of what the attraction to marriage is. Marriage is a public and social affirmation of love and of partnership; a mutual declaration of intention, done in a way that is nearly universally recognised. It's about the two of us standing up in front of our friends and family and saying "you know what, we're in this for life." Tradition, affirmation, determination ... And this is sounding corny, but I can't put it any better than that.

 

Lots of people say "...but it's just a piece of paper." Those are the same people who don't want to get married. But if it was "just a piece of paper" it wouldn't be such a big deal for them, would it? Marriage is a socially recognised institution, prehaps the most enduring. Even in a society in which the legal rights have been replicated by other relationships, marriage continues to hold a special place in our hearts and minds and fears. And that's why I'm getting married (well that, and the fact that I really, really, really love my fiance and want to whole world to know it!)

[Mary3]

Why get married? I used to ask myself that question quite a bit. I was pretty much of the view that it was pointless unless you wanted to have kids. After all, where I live you get the same rights after living together for a number of years anyway. I was happy with that.

 

But then, much to my surprise, I got engaged. I know understand a little of what the attraction to marriage is. Marriage is a public and social affirmation of love and of partnership; a mutual declaration of intention, done in a way that is nearly universally recognised. It's about the two of us standing up in front of our friends and family and saying "you know what, we're in this for life." Tradition, affirmation, determination ... And this is sounding corny, but I can't put it any better than that.

 

Lots of people say "...but it's just a piece of paper." Those are the same people who don't want to get married. But if it was "just a piece of paper" it wouldn't be such a big deal for them, would it? Marriage is a socially recognised institution, prehaps the most enduring. Even in a society in which the legal rights have been replicated by other relationships, marriage continues to hold a special place in our hearts and minds and fears. And that's why I'm getting married (well that, and the fact that I really, really, really love my fiance and want to whole world to know it!)

 

The divorce rate is quite high.

 

For me personally if that person is the * one * then 2 years later they will still be * the one * when you walk down the aisle together...

 

My point is that getting to KNOW the person is far more important than the flowers and decorations. ( marraige )

 

The decorations won't save you when you find out later that person you married is bad with money , bad with temper , and so forth...

 

If that person is wonderful enough to take a bullet for you this month then maybe 6 months from now their feelings change for you and they let you take the shot full force.

 

Thats the biggest problem . People marry because they are going to have a baby , their parents want to throw a big shabang , they are * in love * , they want to impress the world.

 

But none of those things can save a marriage that happened too quickly.

 

You can * be in love * with someone and 10 months later you grow tired of 53 traits they posses and you want out.

 

Thats where I say WAIT until you can find out if you can live with that persons good and bad and then take the plunge.

[bab]

The divorce rate is quite high.

 

For me personally if that person is the * one * then 2 years later they will still be * the one * when you walk down the aisle together...

 

My point is that getting to KNOW the person is far more important than the flowers and decorations. ( marraige )

 

.

.

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But none of those things can save a marriage that happened too quickly.

 

You can * be in love * with someone and 10 months later you grow tired of 53 traits they posses and you want out.

 

Thats where I say WAIT until you can find out if you can live with that persons good and bad and then take the plunge.

 

Sure. I like the idea of marriage, but I agree wholeheartedly with the waiting aspect. It shocked me when my husband and I were doing the pre-martial counseling stuff to see some of the questions people were supposed to ask their soon to be spouse. Like, "what do you like to do in your spare time?" "Do you have any hobbies?" Okay, I think that if you don't already know the answer to questions like those, you should automatically fail pre-marital counseling and have to wait another year before attempting to get married again.

 

Wait. Make sure you've got a partner you can rely on.

[Guest]

in the near future im going to ask my girlfriend to marry me.

 

Im going it not for soacial acceptance, not because im insecure as i am, and im certainly not going to impress many of you am i?

 

To tell you the truth, the fact that I love her is only a part of the reason i want to take this step.

 

I think that true love is a verb. You know you love someone when your happiness is so dependant on their happiness, that you prefer their needs to your needs. You become attentive to what they need and it matters more to you that they are happy than that you are happy. That takes commitment, when you feel like that about someone, you want to do the most loving thing you can for them, and promise to be there for ever.

 

having said that, my mate just phoned me and needs alift cos he fell asleep on the train - now thats also love!

 

gotta go!

[Mary3]

in the near future im going to ask my girlfriend to marry me.

 

Im going it not for soacial acceptance, not because im insecure as i am, and im certainly not going to impress many of you am i?

 

To tell you the truth, the fact that I love her is only a part of the reason i want to take this step.

 

I think that true love is a verb. You know you love someone when your happiness is so dependant on their happiness, that you prefer their needs to your needs. You become attentive to what they need and it matters more to you that they are happy than that you are happy. That takes commitment, when you feel like that about someone, you want to do the most loving thing you can for them, and promise to be there for ever.

 

having said that, my mate just phoned me and needs alift cos he fell asleep on the train - now thats also love!

 

gotta go!

 

 

Its also so very romantic and fun....yes.....just be sure that you know that person VERY well Romance is awesome....it does not necessarily have to lead to marriage.

But marriage is good for those who want to tell me they want to spend the next 75 years with that person . ( because you said he/she is forever ) Do you see yourself with that person 75 years from now ?

[Guest]

absolutely, the thought of being without her 75 years from now (I'd be 97!) is terrible to me. I simply can't wait to experience the whole length of life with her (as indeed i am doing now).

[skylight]

I personally don't feel the need to get married, although I live with someone. Marriage just creates legal tangles, if you ask me and is a way of trying to control society, it doesn't guarantee a successful relationship. Born free, stay free I say. If you love someone and are committed to each other what difference does it make? Marriage is just a legal phenomenon created by man and I think it's quite comical. And as for making vows before God....well I don't think he invented marriage or animals would have to marry also....he just wants us all to be happy and live in peace. However if marriage is for you, that's fine by me, each to his own. We shouldn't enforce our beliefs on anyone else.