Husband said something odd

[Casey70]

Last night after my husband and I went to bed, he kissed me good night like always and I was on my way to dreamland, when all of a sudden after being in the bed for about 15 minutes thinking he was ready to go to sleep, he says to me, "Oh I have something to tell you." I told him ok I was listening. He proceeds to tell me about this radio station he listenes to at work and how the DJ was talking about a woman who found out her husband had cheated. He says that she got her husband back good and posted a billboard all over town announcing to everyone what her husband had done.

 

He told me how he thought that was interesting a woman would do that. I told him, "Yeah that was interesting and her husband probably deserved it." So I'm thinking thats the end of the conversation and was ready to go to sleep. Before I knew it, he chimmed in again about how he was on his way home from work, and saw a car sitting out in some guys driveway. The back of the car looked to have been spray painted and read, "My name is (insert name) I am married, have 2 kids and I cheat on my wife." My husband then tells me he thought that was odd to, that people announce their spouse is cheating by spray painting it or getting a billboard etc.

 

Now, my husband and I talk about things alot, such as family, friends, things going on in the world, however, that was the first time he ever shared with me 2 cheating stories. As a matter of fact I can't think of a time really where we have talked about cheating people. So naturally I found this odd. I went on to sleep thinking maybe he just wanted to share this with me and it was no big deal. Its probably still not a big deal, but it was odd none the less. Do others think it was odd for him to all of a sudden tell me this info? Is there a reason behind it? I kept thinking he had a point to make with what he said but not sure. Thanks in advance.

[JackJack]

I'm not sure that I think its all that odd, but do you feel it is becasue he has never mentioned or talked to you about other people cheating? Maybe he was just trying to make conversation? I don't know if he had a reason for why he told you this or not. Do you feel he is doing something or he feels you are, and thats why he told you of this?

[bab]

I don't think it was odd. Sounds like it just peaked his interest and he thought he would share his thoughts with the person he loves. I wouldn't worry about it at all.

[Guest]

I don't think it was odd. Sounds like it just peaked his interest and he thought he would share his thoughts with the person he loves. I wouldn't worry about it at all.

 

Thanks. Yeah I'm not all that worried about it, it was just odd becasue we have talked about many things before and that was not one of them. I do think he wanted to just share with me what he heard and saw.

 

JackJack, no I don't think he has reason to think I'm doing anything, because I'm not, and I don't feel he is either. Nothing seems odd or weird in our life right now other than when he mentioned that. Thanks to you both.

[quankanne]

sounds like those particular actions stuck in his head because he found it hard to believe that people would respond like that. Usually you hear of fights or going to counselling or even threats, but for the most part, it's unusual for a betrayed spouse to publicly shame the adulterer. Pretty dang clever if you ask me ...

[portableversion]

THis girl i knew scratched WHORE on all all sides of her ex boyfriend's car when she found out he cheated on her.

 

Served him right.

[Chinook]

Thanks. Yeah I'm not all that worried about it, it was just odd becasue we have talked about many things before and that was not one of them. I do think he wanted to just share with me what he heard and saw.

 

JackJack, no I don't think he has reason to think I'm doing anything, because I'm not, and I don't feel he is either. Nothing seems odd or weird in our life right now other than when he mentioned that. Thanks to you both.

 

Um, I post on a couple of internet forums and this was big big news out there yesterday so it could just be that with it being mentioned on radio it grabbed his attention. I wouldn't worry too much about it. I think the nature of the stories kinda seem a bit surreal so maybe he was looking to validate his own opinion of the unreality of these kinds of things. The woman who posted the bill board also has a blog and wrote it up there. In addition to that the billboard was opposite the guy's office so all his co-workers could see it.

 

Yikes.

[scrybe74]

I think it's very odd. confront him and give him a chance to confess. He may have done something and is feeling incredible guilt...which is a good sign. It's possible that he's done something that he regrets it deeply. Good luck to you!

[JamesM]

No, I would go with the "he wanted to share with you" idea. I highly doubt that he would feel the urge to confess that way.

[Sand&Water]

I don't think it was odd for your husband to have shared the idea with you. It is part of normal conversation within any relationship. However what I find particularly strange is the way he started his talk with you. You said, he said "Oh I have something to tell you", which sounds like he is not in a relaxed stress-free type of communication. If he had said "Oh honey, I was listening to the radio one day and I happen to hear a woman etc. etc.", then it would be less direct and more welcoming.

 

Don't blow it out of proportion, it'll drive you crazy. Talk to him, if it makes you feel better.

[typical]

If it were me, I would of added, "yeah, that is pretty crazy, so, is there something you want to tell me"?

 

Question: do you have 2 kids?

 

Maybe he was just sharing info with you, but the timing is a bit odd. Maybe he was trying to gauge your reaction to cheating in general. I agree with s&w...his delivery sounds a bit staged. Just my opinion. But then again, I am extremely suspicious of everrrrryyyythhhiiiiinnnggg.

[Becoming]

I think it's odd the way it came up and WHEN it came up.

 

My H and I are like you--can talk about most anything--but when he started saying odd things briefly like this I didn't think much about it because it never dawned on me that he would ever be unfaithful. Turns out he was having an email thing with someone he met online, which he never suspected I would snoop and find, which was easy to do.

 

Something in you is on alert or you wouldn't have written this. I'd be keeping my eyes and ears open.

 

If there is something going on, catching it early can nip it in the bud and control the damage. If not, you'll have your reassurance.

[Guest]

I think it's odd the way it came up and WHEN it came up.

 

My H and I are like you--can talk about most anything--but when he started saying odd things briefly like this I didn't think much about it because it never dawned on me that he would ever be unfaithful. Turns out he was having an email thing with someone he met online, which he never suspected I would snoop and find, which was easy to do.

 

Something in you is on alert or you wouldn't have written this. I'd be keeping my eyes and ears open.

 

If there is something going on, catching it early can nip it in the bud and control the damage. If not, you'll have your reassurance.

 

 

 

Hi thanks for all the replies. Yes its not really what he said I don't guess but it was how he said it and the all of suddeness about it. Its possible he meant to say something to me about earlier in the evening and forgot or maybe he just wanted to wait till later on. The way he went about it and the sound of his voice kind of like it was a planned thing to tell me, something he might have rehearsed to say to me. Not that what he was saying wasn't so, but it was the way he went about it. I agree to with someone esle said, he might have brought it up to me to see what my general reaction to people who cheated was.

[Walk]

Maybe he thinks you're having an affair or that there's something going on, and doesn't know how to talk about it with you?

[Guest]

Maybe he thinks you're having an affair or that there's something going on, and doesn't know how to talk about it with you?

 

 

 

I guess anything is possible. But if thats what he thinks he can keep on thinking it, because its not so. He is a very paranoid insecure person anyway by nature so it wouldn't surprise me for him to think that. I remember once awhile back I threw some trash in the trash can it was a paper towel that I wiped up a spill with. He came in to take the trash outside, I caught him on the deck going through the trash. When he saw me standing there he looked like a deer caught in head lights. I asked what he was doing, he stuttered and said, "Uhhhh taking out the trash." I remember laughing as I walked away from the door. His insecurites have gotten the best of him before. Must be a terrible way to live.

[ridingthebulls]

Trying to gauge your reaction because he either thinks you are or is doing it himself. Sounds more like doing it himself though based on the scenarios he brought up. Sounds like he really wants to tell you.

[Guest]

Trying to gauge your reaction because he either thinks you are or is doing it himself. Sounds more like doing it himself though based on the scenarios he brought up. Sounds like he really wants to tell you.

 

Hmmm I'm not convinced he's cheating. He obviously wanted to guage your reaction, though, which may be weird. Ask him directly, but not in a threatening way, so he'll feel free to open up to you.