SeatPanda Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 I broke my fiancé (now ex fiancé)´s trust, on several occasions (not cheating or anything, just letting secrets of his slip to friends I thought were trustworthy, and discussing our relationship with his mother). Though it was on accident, I realize what I did and why he got so angry with me. I haven´t contacted him in over a month as I have been on vacation, but I wanted to apologize because I truly realize the things I did wrong and why he did what he did, and I simply wanted to tell him that I am sorry for the pain I caused. (my email)¨I was reading through a few old emails recently and I started to realize why things went so wrong and how much I really did hurt you. I really didn´t think things through enough on many occasions and I made some very stupid mistakes. I can´t take back what I did but I do want to apologize and tell you that I know you were right about so many things. I only wish I´d listened better, sooner. I hope the rest of the summer treats you well and if you need a friend, I´ll be around.¨ (his response)¨The only thing you keep doing wrong is contacting me. You lap top will be at my house sometime within the next 30 days. You can call me to schedule an appointment to retrieve your items from my room as that time nears. other than that, leave me alone. I'm the last person you need to tell that you screwed up.¨ Does this mean he simply wants more time apart, time which I didn´t give him when he originally asked for a trial separation, or is this a ¨you´re a stalker, why don´t you get the hell away from me?¨ email? I want to think there is hope of him someday forgiving me but I wonder if perhaps the damage I did is irreversible and that this is his way of telling me it is over, forever... I really love him, with all my heart, and if he will be happier without me then so be it, but I would like to know how others read into the situation... we were together as friends for 3 years, then boyfriend/girlfriend for 3 years, then fiancés for 2 years. I was at the point of starting to plan our wedding when he broke it off and I just don´t know if I should keep hoping (with no contact, giving him his space like I should have at the beginning) or just give up hope completely and let him have his life... And one more question ... is it really true that first loves never work out? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 I'd say you weren't demonstrating any reasonable appreciation/respect for his requests. And should learn to think before you engage your mouth Now it would seem his words are as they indicate you just won't listen Move on there will be others. Yes the deal with first loves is true. Link to post Share on other sites
superconductor Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 other than that, leave me alone. I don't know how much clearer he could be. Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenSpirit Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 He is being quite clear... Dont even see where you can read anything into that... Hes angry and doesnt want to talk to you... Move on and let it go... Show him respect at this point and leave him alone... Sorry to be harsh but its true hun... Link to post Share on other sites
Author SeatPanda Posted July 28, 2006 Author Share Posted July 28, 2006 Guest, I have found no other that makes me feel the way he did. I know that I messed up. I cannot take back the past. I did not demonstrate respect for him and while I was having troubles of my own at the time, that is no excuse for the stupid mistakes I made. I am starting to think that the deal with first loves really is not true ... I love this man and I cannot get him out of my mind. I pray for his happiness and that, even though he no longer wants anything to do with me, with good reason, he will someday forgive me in his heart. I envy the woman who does him right. It could have been me, and that´s what hurts the most. You are all right, and I thank you for your input ... though reality hurts, I have to face my mistakes and move on and hope that one day I may shed this burden of guilt I carry every day I miss him. A word of advice: when he/she asks for space, give it to him/her ... if they love you, they will come back. Don´t screw up like I did. And no matter how frustrated and upset you are, keep your mouth shut - all the advice in the world will never make up for losing your best friend. It´s about time I truly listen to him and give him what he deserves. ¨I'd say you weren't demonstrating any reasonable appreciation/respect for his requests. And should learn to think before you engage your mouth Now it would seem his words are as they indicate you just won't listen Move on there will be others. Yes the deal with first loves is true.¨ Link to post Share on other sites
johnnytable Posted July 28, 2006 Share Posted July 28, 2006 Ya, you just need to leave him alone. He is very clear about this. Stop contacting him. Link to post Share on other sites
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