Kathleen2260 Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 I had posted about my bf who had an EA with an ex of his who is married. He doesnt' think it was an EA because she did not return his feelings and basically shot him down. this happened in March- June 2005. He was telling me that they were just friends and he wasnt' interested in her THAT way but he kept lying to me about time they spent together and when she would call he woudl hide it from me. It drove me crazy and we were always fighting. He would promise not to talk to her then she woudl call our house and he would have a half hour conversation right in front of me. Recently I found a letter he wrote her back then, saying he had feelings for her again (they dated 10 years ago) She has been married for three years) I confronted him and he confessed that he'd had feelings for her back then but it was just a temporary thing (probably beause seh wasnt' interested. So recenlty my boyfriend brought up the engagemetn thing (we had been talking about getting engaged before I found the letter 3 months ago) He already bought a ring but when I found the letter I was so hurt I put the brakes on that. Right now I'm trying to figure things out. Trying to decide if I want to stay or go. Lately we've been going to counseling and he's attempting to gain my trust again (he has a LONG road ahead of him!) So anyway, I told him I don't want to get engaged. I am still hurt and angry over his betrayal and I'd be an idiot to accept his proposal. Also yesterday even though I don't think anything physical happened between my bf and his ex, I wanted to be on the safe side so I had STD testing. I didn;t tell my bf at first but I was late getting home and he asked where I was. I told him and that it was in case he was still being dishonest becasue I didn't want to catch something from his ex (she constantly cheats on her husband with a variety of guys). He tried to reassure me that he has never slept with her since we've been dating but I just told him well I guess you have nothing to worry about then but its just for peace of mind. Well eventually my bf got mad and started yelling at me and arguing and he kept saying "why don't you just tell me that you are leaving me cause thats why you are doing all of this!" He said he thinks I had STD testing done because I found somebody new that I want to sleep with and that I won't say yes to getting engaged (even though its something I've wanted for a long time now) but I've said no because I JUST found out 3 months ago about his lies/betrayal. So its still new in my mind. I'm not jumping up and down to marry him. It doesnt' mean I don't still love him. I tried to explain this but he just kept saying that there have been signs and he thinks I am going to leave or cheat on him (funny considering HE is the cheater/liar among us) Stupid me tried to reassure him. Why is he acting like this??? Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Why is he acting like this??? guilt .................... Link to post Share on other sites
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