18 Months With Her, 1 Month Without Her and She Wants To Be With Me

[cantshakethelove]

Just over a month ago my lover and best friend broke up with me do my own personal stress problems and anger issues due to my stressfull occupation.

 

The break up was a huge wake up call for myself. I quit work immediately. I look back and see what it did to our relationship and it makes my stomach cringe.

 

I started dating another girl 2 weeks after she called it off. A week later my ex called me balling and would not tell me why so I kind of shook it off and was nice to her and tried to see what the problem was. The girl I dated was simply a rebound girl and in consideration that the cause of the breakup was my fault, I wanted another chance to make things up with my lost love.

 

Things have slowly progressed since the break up. Recently, my ex and I went to a friendly gathering. I was texting to my friends who would not leave me alone and she confronted me in front of everyone asking whom I was texting to. I told her and meantioned the name of the girl I had been dating. I saw the smirk on her face and I know it pissed her off. I then had to make a phone call and came back as I was saying my final words to the person I was speaking to and then she asked in front of everyone who I had been speaking to. I told her it was none of her business. She suddenly after 3 weeks of no contact had become more interested in my life. I actually enjoyed seeing her like this because it gave me a sense of hope.

 

Then we went off in another room and talked for a bit. The next day I went and bought a single rose along with a poem I had written her and put it on her windshield before she went to work. The next day we had a talk and I went over to say what I had to say.

 

She said she didnt want a boyfriend right now but she did still love me. I couldnt help but notice her body language and it was telling me to go in for the kiss. SO I did. I went in for the kiss and before I knew we were in her toolshed and she was starting to take off my clothes. She stopped suddenly and asked herself what am I doing. As this was completely not a thing she would ever do. I grabbed her and kissed her more and continued to hug her. She broke down crying. Said how much she had missed me. She still wanted to be with me but wasnt sure if she was ready. I think she is finally realizing a world without me. She also said she loves me more then I will ever know.

 

Now what to do?

[MrPot]

My girl broke up with me about 8 weeks ago, and I've had very similar episodes with her. She freaks out over the notion of me being with another woman, even though she chose to end the relationship. However, she hasn't responded in any manner like yours, so it sounds like your girl has much stronger feelings left for you than mine. Maybe that's because I've chosen to move on myself and haven't made any gestures like that.

 

Anyway, what you need to do now is pull away. Do the "NC" thing. If she has feelings that strong for you, all you need to do is stop acting like you're spending any time thinking about her for a couple weeks and she'll probably come crawling back. She could probably go on for many months having you as a friend who will always be there and who will always buy her flowers, but she won't be able to stand more than a couple weeks if you don't take the initiative to contact her. She'll probably think you're with that other girl and that will drive her crazy. Don't even answer all her phone calls. Answer them half the time and be brief when you do. Pretty soon, she'll probably tell you she wants you back. Then the reigns are in your hands.

[cantshakethelove]

She has already told me she wants to be with me. I might try the "NC" thing. We already did the no contact thing though.

[MrPot]

If she wants back with you already, then no contact isn't necessary if you want her back. She's yours now. Just remmeber to be a challenge in the future and make sure she stays in love with you.

[cantshakethelove]

I need help. I dont know how much pain from her I can endure. Being without her and the thought of never being with her again was bad enough. Now that I have her in my life again and have got to hold onto her and kiss her she says she wants to be with me but not right now. This puts everything back in her control. What do I do? Someone please help.