can't unlove her Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]My wife gave me a letter saying the she no longer wanted to be with me and that she was moving out. I was completely blindsided by this. We had some problems communicating, but I thought that it was under control. Apparently she had been brewing for the last six months and came to the decision that all was lost and hopeless. I asked her if we could go the counseling and she said I could but she was not interested. We have been together for 7 ½ years. I was surprised that she would not want to try one time to resolve our differences. She is bound and determined to live by herself, while share custody of our children. We have been separated for four weeks now. I still come to the house every morning to take our 2 children to school and daycare. I am at the house until she gets home with the kids as well. She feels bad because I am suffering. The odd thing of this is that she is still intimate with me. At first I thought that is was just a pity episode. But we have had difficulty taking about details of what seems like divorce. We both want a peaceful environment say we can stay friends, for us and our kids. What I have found is that I can have as much intimacy as I want. She is just as open to my wants in the bedroom as before the breakup. She also tells me in letters that she feels bad for what she has lost, but I am still here. [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]What is going on? Does she just want to see what it is like on the other side, grass greener? [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]I am confused[/sIZE][/FONT] Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 She is just a woman being a woman. Join the club because many men are going through this same thing. I would stop being intimate with her. If she wants to not be with you anymore then she needs to do it all the way. No halfway crap. Link to post Share on other sites
jmars Posted July 21, 2006 Share Posted July 21, 2006 I went through the same thing with my wife of 8 years. We have two children, my step-daughter and our son. I was equally blindsided by her announcement, confused at to why she didn't want to make any effort to work through our problems, and we continued to share the same bed and be intimate for a month after she announced her intent to move out. I have also continued to play housedad for the past two onths since she moved out, taking care of my step-daughter and son, even as I was looking (and just yesterday found) some part-time night work. If you want, check out my thread "Coming or Going?!" here in the Second Chances section, for all of the details. Let me say however, that I agree with Woggle, that you should stop being intimate with her. At least for now, 'til you can accurately gauge the wind direction and have a better understanding of what the Hell has been going on, et al. Cheers, mate! And best of luck with things! Link to post Share on other sites
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