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So I went out with the guy for 3 years off and on. We were in HS so we were both young and niave. Eventually we broke up for the last time and I always wanted to get back with him. My sister convinced me that he had gotten over the break up and to just let it go. So I did. Everytime we broke up it seemed like I just wanted to get with someone new to forget about him. So I did just that. And this guy and I became bestfriends. I truly thought that I loved him and we got married. Even though I have been married to him I constantly was thinking about my High School Sweetheart (HSS). I would search the Web for him and stuff. I couldn't help to think "what if?" So I decided to be happy I had to have a child. I know... big mistake. It didn't work.. and just recently my HSS contacted me again and we talked about what went wrong. I told my husband that I am talking to HSS again. He doesn't like it, but I told him that I won't stop. Thing is that nothing really has ever been right between me and hubby. and now that HSS is back in my life I just can't be happy with hubby, knowing that my heart has always been someplace else. If I didn't have a child I would leave and be with HSS. But since I have a 2 month old I can't take him away from hubby. He is a great father and a great man. He is also my best friend. But I just don't have my heart in it anymore. What should I do? Some friends said to leave now while my boy is so young, but it would crush hubby. He knows things aren't going well right now though. And HSS doesn't want me to get a divorce for him. He thinks I should try to work this out with hubby. But I don't want to work it out. I just wish there was an easier way to do things. So the question is do I stay miserable in a relationship where I am not sexually attracted to my hubby and my heart is with HSS. Or do I make ny hubby misserable by being happy myself? HELP!!!

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Well, you and your HSS broke up a lot in the past...what makes you think anything would work out any better between you this time? You say that you were both immature back then, but what you have been doing - marrying a man even though you were constantly thinking about someone else, deciding to have a baby to "be happy", considering abandoning your husband simply becasue HSS has deigned to contact you again...sounds like you still might be on the immature side.

 

Why don't you go to some marriage counseling before you toss aside your whole marriage? HSS is telling you to work on your marriage. Maybe he still doesn't want you as much as you want him.

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I know I married him for the wrong reason. Even had a baby for the wrong reason too. But I will say that I was happy for a while. Until things started to go wrong. Which made me say "what if" even more. HSS is going through a divorce right now and he doesn't want me to ruin my marriage. He wants me to be happy no matter what. He also suggested marriage counseling, but I don't think my hubby thinks that we are at that point yet.

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scarlyjones

are you kidding??? HSS is in the middle of a divorce,.....you are in a loveless marriage.....you and your HSS broke up constantly,......how about taking a freakin breath and figuring out what is best for your SON???? You dont matter as much as your son anymore. Its all about your son. He needs a Daddy. Not a weekend daddy who doesnt get along with his mom and growing up in a home with no father figure all because his selfish Mommy wanted to relive high school.

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