he's gone - i'm sad

[pahotty]

hi. i've never posted here before but here goes. i met an older man while he was in the area for work. i worked for him and we teased and flirted all the time. we always went out in a group and had a great time. he would buy me wine when i asked, we bar b qued outside. well need less to say, the job ended, and off he went. i couldn't stand the fact he left to go home to his significant other and on to another job. i called his house when he was home, just to see if he was really at home with her. she answered all the time and i would hang up. i've called him a few times, he's always nice. do you think i have a chance?? thanks. by the way, he travels all over, and he just might travel back my way, he does major construction.

[Kiz]

Maybe I didn't read your post correctly, but didn't you say he has an SO?

 

1. Why would you even think of disrespecting her and yourself by going after him? Leave him alone.

 

2. If he's going after you, thereby direspecting her, you, and himself, why would you even want him? Trust me, what a cheater will do with you, s/he will do to you. When you take his SO's place, someone else will come along and take yours.

 

You should be happy this man is gone and you should be meeting SINGLE men who are interested in you.

 

Let this go.

[Tony T]

If he has a girlfriend, I think you ought to butt out. If you get hurt, that's totally your fault. You are on notice that another woman is the prime person in his life and not you.

 

Yes, you do have a chance, a very slim one though. But if he breaks up his relationship for you, he would break up his relationship with you for somebody else he might flirt with at his workplace. There is no indication in your post that he has any fondness for you beyond a nice friend.

 

If you don't respect the sanctity of other people's relationships, you will have no grounds for other people to respect your relationships.

 

Perhaps he is unfairly misleading you. If that's the case, I'd be pretty pissed at him. On the other hand, he probably has NO idea you are as smitten as you are. Maybe you ought to tell him and clear this all up...find out just where he's coming from. If he tells you this is not a happening thing, maybe you'll get the message.

[Laurynn]

The guy is a charming dog. I know the kind quite well cuz 4 years ago I met a guy just like that. Him and his construction company were in my (small) town doing work at the local Mill....there for 6 months. He had his own apartment. My first question to him was, "are you married?".....he didn't say "no" but jokingly responded in a way that lead me to believe he wasn't married.

 

I was hot for this guy. He was funny, hard working, smart, charming, sexy. I cherished our time together. Then one night I was over at his place and I noticed that the phone cord was unplugged from the wall. I thought that was strange, so asked him about it. He simply said he didn't want to be bothered by 'work stuff' at home, during his time off. I didn't buy this too easily....so when he wasn't looking, I plugged the phone in...and sure enough, a couple hours later it rang. Guess who? His WIFE.

 

I was crushed, devastated, heartbroken. I'd not yet slept with him, but it was getting close. Thank God I didn't.....wouldn't have been too pleased with myself for sleeping with someone's husband (poor woman).

 

This guy, along with his company, went from town to town doing contract work.....so I imagine he had himself a 'hunny' in many towns. He was a lying, conniving b*stard and I really felt so sorry for his poor wife......

 

After I found out about her, after I blasted his ass for deceiving me....he told me the story about how she was crazy but that he 'stayed for the kids' sakes' (crap)....

 

Guys like this don't have an ounce of conscience or scruples, values or morals. They think of women as objects to use. They have no respect for women, period...and maybe a lack of respect for themselves.

 

You want nothing to do with a guy like this, I tell you from experience. He's never going to leave his 'significant other' (most likely a WIFE) for you.......never, ever ever...and if he did, you'd simply be the next gal he screws around on.

 

I know you probably fell head over heels for him....and it hurts you to imagine life without him....but the guy is boil on the ass of life......he's nothing but trouble and unless you put him out of your mind, you'll end up a mess.

 

Don't phone his place anymore and hang up.....you could get into big trouble for that (that's harassment).....his "woman" could have the line traced to see who's doing it. Out of respect for her, just leave them alone...and be thankful that you're not in her shoes.

 

If he tries to contact you, tell him to p*ss off...if he persists, tell him you'll contact his "significant other" and inform her what kind of boob she's with...that should stop him in his tracks.

 

Laurynn