I would do anything to be with her again.

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(I apologize upfront for the length; I just want to get everything in the open)

 

I would do anything to be with her again. My ex and I were together for about 2.5 years, of which we were in love for 2.

 

About a year and a half into our relationship I went on a family vacation and cheated on her, which I'm ashamed to admit. I realized what I did so I told her what happened. She told me that she would give me a second chance, but if I ever broke her trust again, she would leave me. I gave her a promise ring to say that I would never cheat on her again.

 

I have really been contemplating why I ever did it in the first place. I did love her and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, but she was my first love and I want to see if she was the one for me. I know that sounds pathetic and now I’m considered an ass whole, so let’s move on.

 

After a month or two we were back to the way things were and I loved her more than I ever did. Things were great and I couldn't have asked for more, but three months ago it all came to a shattering mess.

 

It was her senior prom (I'm one year older) and we had a good time. Since I still lived with my family, I told my mom that I would be home around 3am. I stayed with my ex till about 2 and told her I had to be home at 2.

 

I had a friend (female) that worked the night shift at a hotel and wanted to stop by and see her. I actually didn't know her very long, but she asked me to stop by and see her after the prom. We just kind of sat around and talked, I SWEAR. The next thing I know it was well after 3 and I get a phone call from my mom cussing me out. She told me that she tried my cell once, but didn't go through so see called my ex's house. Of course my ex told my mom that I had left over an hour ago and didn't know were I was. So they thought that I got is some kind of accident. I called my ex back to tell her that I was fine and where I was. She was tired so she said that we would just talk about it tomorrow. She wasn't upset or anything, just relieved that I was ok.

 

The next day she gave me hell. Of course she didn't believe that I didn't cheat on her. She told me that it was over and gave me the promise ring back. It was not an argument, it was just both of us sitting down and crying (in the 2.5 years we were together we never fought).

 

Two days later, two days, I called her up and she acted as if nothing happened. I asked if she wanted to hang out and play some tennis, she said she would love to. The whole time it was as if we were still together. A week later I called her and told her I had something important to talk about. We meet at a park and told her that I still loved her and would do anything to get her back. She told me that she would love me forever, but we could never be together again. She left me at the park crying.

 

We still stayed in touch, a call about every other week. She said she wanted to stay friends. Then just a few days ago, she tells me that she has a new guy. She said that they are unofficial, because she’s leafing for college in a month. I fell apart. I have never had so many different feelings at the same time. I don't think I ever cried as much as I did in the last 3 days.

 

We are getting together tonight so she can show me some pictures from a trip she just got back from and so I can show her my new place. I called her today when I got out of work and she told me that she was "out", but we would still be able to get together later. I was heart broken; I knew she was with her boyfriend.

 

I love her so much. I love her more than life itself because I would rather continue loving her and be miserable than move on. It just doesn't make any sense to move on. I already found the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. I would rather cling to hope than be in the arms of another woman. I swear that this hell that I've been through has taught me that I will never cheat on anyone ever again.

 

I would do anything to be with her again. How do I get her back?