Darkwall Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Stag party is over. The future groom has disappeared off to...? Private party is quickly set up back at... house. Ten men and two strippers/dancers are gathered together in a tiny bachelor appartment house. They are all smashed. What are the odds nothing happened. Did "SOMETHING or ANYTHING" happen? Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Who are you and why do you want to know? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Darkwall Posted July 31, 2006 Author Share Posted July 31, 2006 my boyfriend was one of those men and says nothing happened. I'm finding it hard to believe that nothing happened. It seems almost impossible. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Well something happened.... I doubt they sat around sipping tea and were in deep conversation about the stock market........ If he won't tell you you have to assume the worst right? Link to post Share on other sites
Sand&Water Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Did "SOMETHING or ANYTHING" happen? I would say yes. Something did happen. The fact that he hasn't been open about the whole night makes you wonder and question more vigorously. And, you know how it is with men - Ten men together in a small apartment, with dancers, it is likely that the testosterone got the best of them. Strong and trustworthy relationships withstand such tests. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Stag party is over. The future groom has disappeared off to...? Private party is quickly set up back at... house. Ten men and two strippers/dancers are gathered together in a tiny bachelor appartment house. They are all smashed. What are the odds nothing happened. Did "SOMETHING or ANYTHING" happen? You have to speak more carefully. What does "something" or "anything" mean? I'm not intending to be disingenuous here, but your language, as you've asked the question here, anyway, is giving him WAY too much room for interpretation, and you're communicating in very unclear terms, if this is how you asked it. In a man's mind, there is probably a "line" that he tells himself he wouldn't cross. If he doesn't cross that line, then as far as he's concerned, "nothing" happened. Different men may be different, and your man's line is probably different than yours, or different than what you may expect it to be. Now you are asking insistently if "something" or "anything" happened, so if the dancers took their clothes off, for example, is that "something" to you? Because I'm betting it's "nothing" to him. And you will go on getting nowhere with these vague terms. I'm not making excuses for men and stag parties, but I'm telling you if you really want to know, you'd better communicate clearly and unambiguously. Don't even USE the words "something" "anything" or "nothing" because they are all relative and without a reference point between the two of you. As long as you talk in terms of whether "anything" "something" or "nothing" happened, you will be miscommunicating. "I would like you to be honest with me. You're all there in the house together. What did the dancers do?" Also, realize you may also be up against a kind of a guys' "code of silence" here. Again, I'm not agreeing with it (and actually I don't like it at all) but some guys think a stag/bachelor party is a special "bonding" fun zone where the normal rules are suspended - or at least stretched - and where the men are bound to secrecy by peer pressure. I don't have any advice on that one, just offering insight. (I think the likelihood of a man participating in this manner is probably largely related to his maturity level...) Link to post Share on other sites
Stripper Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 I use to be a dancer. I always refused the bachelor parties. I'm sorry but I just don't trust a bunch of drunk guys, seeing a naked woman, and not trying anything. Especially when this naked woman is a "Stripper". To society we are whores, if one was to rape us we would be the one on trial. No thank you. I did what I had to do to support my family and as soon as I didn't have to I didn't. I do know though that some girls do and some don't. Ask your man if there was a bouncer. Usually if there is a bouncer involved they are there to protect the women from being touched or violated. It's for the dancers protection. If there was one there it is highly unlikely that a guy spent a couple hundred bucks for a BJ or more. Link to post Share on other sites
CrushedOrgans Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Ask your man if there was a bouncer. Usually if there is a bouncer involved they are there to protect the women from being touched or violated. It's for the dancers protection. If there was one there it is highly unlikely that a guy spent a couple hundred bucks for a BJ or more. a bouncer at a house party? Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 I used to dance , and I never did bachelor parties , but I do know that what the before stated "stripper" said is true .If the dancer brings a bodyguard with her nothing happens , I had co-workers that did and cowerkers that didn't . The ones who didn't took Bodyguards with them to private parties. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Were'nt you complaining that you thought your boyfriend was gay? Now your worried that he messed around with a stripper? Should'nt you be ecstatic if he messed around with a stripper? Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Were'nt you complaining that you thought your boyfriend was gay? Now your worried that he messed around with a stripper? Should'nt you be ecstatic if he messed around with a stripper? She didn't say what sex the stripper was. Link to post Share on other sites
Pink Amulet Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Thank you for confirming the point I was going to make. Just because someone is a stripper doesn't mean they have loose morals, and are willing to be gang banged at every bachelor party they attend. They get paid to dance, not f*ck. I use to be a dancer. I always refused the bachelor parties. I'm sorry but I just don't trust a bunch of drunk guys, seeing a naked woman, and not trying anything. Especially when this naked woman is a "Stripper". To society we are whores, if one was to rape us we would be the one on trial. No thank you. I did what I had to do to support my family and as soon as I didn't have to I didn't. I do know though that some girls do and some don't. Ask your man if there was a bouncer. Usually if there is a bouncer involved they are there to protect the women from being touched or violated. It's for the dancers protection. If there was one there it is highly unlikely that a guy spent a couple hundred bucks for a BJ or more. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Darkwall Posted August 1, 2006 Author Share Posted August 1, 2006 Thanks trimmer, I will ask those questions as soon as I cool off and figure out how i am going to approach this rationally. Great advise and suggestions. Burning for revenge, thanks for paying attention. You're probably right, I should be relieved he was with "female" dancers. It's just that his weak efforts of communication and distance is driving my imagination all over the map. He tells me it's just the way he is. So, I'm supposed to put this crazy notion that he's gay out of my head. So why all the attention to two female strangers when it should be directed to me. Especially after all the talks him and I have had? Female dancers who responded... I hope i didn't imply that i thought the dancers were dirty or any such sort. As far as I know there were no bouncers or bodyguards. Believe me, that was my first question. Back to my question now... what could have happened? Link to post Share on other sites
FredTravels Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Back to my question now... what could have happened? Almost anything COULD have happened. They could have all gotten drunk and passed out and the stripper robbed them. They could have outted your boyfriend and all did him with th ereal thing and two strap ons for the strippers They could have pulled a train on the girls They could have danced for the guys They could have blown the guys They could have screwed the guys They could have watched Winnie the Pooh on On-Demand Why ask us? Ask your BF and hopefully you two have a solid enough relationship where he can tell the truth---or at least be a convincing liar! Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 They could have watched Winnie the Pooh on On-Demand Well, I have to confess that I did always find Kanga pretty hot... Link to post Share on other sites
lovestruck234 Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Well, I have to confess that I did always find Kanga pretty hot... :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
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