I'm Never Gonna Get Laid. Ever.

[superfreak]

That's really about it.

 

I mean... I don't think I'm unattractive. I'm a GIRL, fr Chrissakes! I'm not bad to talk to, I'm not all that self-absorbed, I am capable of caring for others... I have some social ineptitude issues (well, I guess that goes without saying).

 

I don't know how to flirt.

I don't know when I'm being flirted WITH, unless, of course, it's when it's someone I don't want to flirt with.

I don't know the first thing about where to meet [available] men, how to meet them, and then, presuming that the first two prerequisites have happened, how to talk to said available man.

 

I'm so frustrated I could scream.

It makes me feel unwanted. Unattractive. I feel so petty and "un-modernly feminine" saying that I would really like some male attention these days, and that the lack of it tends to make my self-esteem plummet. It just makes me wonder what's WRONG with me? Sometimes I wonder if I were just more... I don't know, flirtatious? "Slutty," or whatever that means? A girl of provocative ensembles and open legs? I'm not a club-goer--I don't drink, and besides clubs make me claustrophobic. So I wouldn't know the first thing on how to behave inside the local meat market.

 

Anyway. Thanks for the ventilation. I know I should just be patient -- my friend says that, "Women like you will require a SPECIAL guy. And you might have to wait a while to find him." Special, ok, I can dig that; but doesn't that require some kind of filtration? I mean... A POOL from which to choose? So far I'm working with NONE. NOTHING. NADA. What do I do?

[blind_otter]

Eh. I was like that years ago. I learned how to "act sexy" and have thus many bedpost notches, but it's not all that it's cracked up to be.

 

In any event, what do you do to garner this male attention? I mean, think about it from a marketing perspective. What's your angle? How do you advertise? If you don't have those, you aren't gonna get any sexual revenue, if ya know what I mean.

[FredTravels]

Call Alpha--he will do you. Just don't expect him to take you out for breakfast tomorrow!

[Rikka]

 

Anyway. Thanks for the ventilation. I know I should just be patient -- my friend says that, "Women like you will require a SPECIAL guy. And you might have to wait a while to find him." Special, ok, I can dig that; but doesn't that require some kind of filtration? I mean... A POOL from which to choose? So far I'm working with NONE. NOTHING. NADA. What do I do?

 

I used to have a friend who would tell me similar things... some stupid poem about an apple tree and so on. I had to believe her, it was the only thing I had.

 

I don't know how old you are or anything about you really, but I will tell you my experience. Sexiness is often interchangeable with confidence. If you feel/look/act like you've got it, people will notice. Friendliness is a great way to be flirtatious. A smile goes a long way.

 

After a nasty break up and a long single spell, I was bored and fed up and determined that my dating life must be over. I started online dating (cupid and lavalife etc). I never met anyone who I would ultimately start a relationship with, but I met a lot of interesting people. Some I am still friends with today. Serial dating (as I called it) was a great way for me to practice my interactions and build confidence.

 

As a side note... I hate drinking, I don't enjoy going out to clubs. I swore up and down I would never meet anyone in a club. Guess where I met the current love of my life? In a bar. We've been going strong for over a year. Never discount anyone or anywhere. You never know where the right guy for you could be.

 

(Wow. that's a long message!)

[angelfish]

I know how you feel, except I like going to clubs (not for the drinking or picking up people, but for the dancing-I'm a dance fanatic).

 

I don't know how to flirt either. Not when I want to anyways. Like I'll be talking to some random guy from class or at work and just being my friendly self, not meaning to flirt and then somehow I get asked out by the random guy who I'm not interested in. On the other hand, when I am interested in someone, I get tongue tied and I feel like I want to go in some corner and hide.

 

It doesn't help that I'm the loner type.

 

I've been told that I should join clubs where you're most likely going to meet others who share the same interests.

[stoopid_guy]

I don't know how old you are or anything about you really, but I will tell you my experience. Sexiness is often interchangeable with confidence. If you feel/look/act like you've got it, people will notice. Friendliness is a great way to be flirtatious. A smile goes a long way.

 

Great advice. Any lady who's confident and friendly automatically goes up several notches on the desirability scale for most of us guys, and practically anyone is more attractive when they're smiling.

 

Something else to make you think; The next time you go out, look at couples. You'll realize that a person doesn't have to be good-looking to find someone. Another thing you will see is how often they smile at each other, and (if they're past the first date or two) how confident they are in each other's company.

 

How to talk to guys? How to flirt? Simply pay attention to them. Listen to them. Smile at them. In other words, the same things that would get your own attention.

[dgiirl]

Hey, I can somewhat relate. I dont drink, dont act slutty, dont dress slutty, I'm pretty reserved and smart (so i've been told). However, for every guy who wants the above, there's just as many who really love the way I am. According to them, there's too many slutty ditzy girls out there that I'm unique and they really dig it I dont have tons of guys flocking in my direction, I havent dated much, but I've come to the conclusion that there's few SPECIAL people for everyone. Yes, if you really wanted, you could have A relationship with SOME guy just like everybody else, but it wouldnt last very long and wouldnt be very fulfilling. Or you could just wait for that special someone and have a great relationship. Either your a multi-fling type of girl or you are a relationship type girl. Multi-fling type might get more attention, but usually more attention from guys who just want one thing. A relationship type girl might get less attention, but she's also more picky on who she dates. I'm a relationship type girl. I dont date much, but I've come to not care as much.

 

Also, confidence is a major thing in attracting attention. You dont have to dress slutty, but you can still wear things that make you feel attractive. And stop worrying about how you act, what you should say, worrying/wondering how you can get them to like you. Just be confident in yourself. The rest will work itself out.

[burning 4 revenge]

I don't believe it's possible for a girl who's not unattractive to not get laid.

 

I mean if you want to get laid, believe me you'll get laid

[Ross_K]

Why not try adult friendfinder, or craigslist or some dating site?

[Guest]

I feel the same way!!! I miss men talking to me in public and flirting and it does bring u down hang in ther I 'm not giving up don't u!

That's really about it.

 

I mean... I don't think I'm unattractive. I'm a GIRL, fr Chrissakes! I'm not bad to talk to, I'm not all that self-absorbed, I am capable of caring for others... I have some social ineptitude issues (well, I guess that goes without saying).

 

I don't know how to flirt.

I don't know when I'm being flirted WITH, unless, of course, it's when it's someone I don't want to flirt with.

I don't know the first thing about where to meet [available] men, how to meet them, and then, presuming that the first two prerequisites have happened, how to talk to said available man.

 

I'm so frustrated I could scream.

It makes me feel unwanted. Unattractive. I feel so petty and "un-modernly feminine" saying that I would really like some male attention these days, and that the lack of it tends to make my self-esteem plummet. It just makes me wonder what's WRONG with me? Sometimes I wonder if I were just more... I don't know, flirtatious? "Slutty," or whatever that means? A girl of provocative ensembles and open legs? I'm not a club-goer--I don't drink, and besides clubs make me claustrophobic. So I wouldn't know the first thing on how to behave inside the local meat market.

 

Anyway. Thanks for the ventilation. I know I should just be patient -- my friend says that, "Women like you will require a SPECIAL guy. And you might have to wait a while to find him." Special, ok, I can dig that; but doesn't that require some kind of filtration? I mean... A POOL from which to choose? So far I'm working with NONE. NOTHING. NADA. What do I do?