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Boyfriend talks about his exes


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Hello,

 

I have been in a relationship for about 4 months now. So far it is the best relationship I have ever had. (I am 24 years old). We have such a great time together, have so much to talk about, and he is very loving and mature. However, there is one thing that has been bugging me. He talks about his ex-girlfriends. Of course it is normal for them to come up in conversation but it seems like it is happening very often. He just tells general stories, nothing that is outwardly hurtful to me. But it really bothers me! It makes me feel jealous even though he tells me I am the first person he can see himself marrying. Why I am so jealous about this? He also looks at other women more than I would like. I feel like I make it a point NOT to look at other men for the sake of his feelings. I wish he would do this too but I feel petty even bringing it up. I don't want to fight unnecessarily. When we first met we both had significant others, became friends, and subsequently broke up with the others and started dating. Could this be why I have jealous feelings? Maybe I am scared he will leave me too? I am so confused. Overall, I am very happy with him and our relationship but this one thing has been bugging me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Do I have a right to feel this way or am I just being dumb about it? Thanks for your help!!

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Hello, I have been in a relationship for about 4 months now. So far it is the best relationship I have ever had. (I am 24 years old). We have such a great time together, have so much to talk about, and he is very loving and mature. However, there is one thing that has been bugging me. He talks about his ex-girlfriends. Of course it is normal for them to come up in conversation but it seems like it is happening very often. He just tells general stories, nothing that is outwardly hurtful to me. But it really bothers me! It makes me feel jealous even though he tells me I am the first person he can see himself marrying. Why I am so jealous about this? He also looks at other women more than I would like. I feel like I make it a point NOT to look at other men for the sake of his feelings. I wish he would do this too but I feel petty even bringing it up. I don't want to fight unnecessarily. When we first met we both had significant others, became friends, and subsequently broke up with the others and started dating. Could this be why I have jealous feelings? Maybe I am scared he will leave me too? I am so confused. Overall, I am very happy with him and our relationship but this one thing has been bugging me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Do I have a right to feel this way or am I just being dumb about it? Thanks for your help!!
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hi, i am having the same problem with my boyfriend of 9 months. he has been married twice and brings up his ex's alot. but not in a hurtful manner. just mentions them. he also has a wondering eye!!! everything in our relationship is great, but this. we finally had a talk about it. he says he looks, but is not looking. he found who he loves and is happy. why am i so insecure? we are both in our 40's and have both been thru alot. i feel it is desrespectful to be looking so much and he should respect my feelings on this. he says he will watch what he does from now on, didn't realize he was doing it. why does this hurt so bad? any help out there?
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