jerbear Posted August 14, 2006 Share Posted August 14, 2006 Just thought I would be the first one here to let you know Brittany Jean, apart from having a great smile (as previously noted) you have fantastic tits I agree, I'm attracted! :lmao: From what I have seen, some women left the guy because he was a true bum but that was after 5 years, 2 kids, and her hoping he would change... :rolleyes: She married young and wanted to be married to almost and wanted to be a mom. Now divorced and "man hunting." Another younger one was after the car and money. Amazing what happens after a few years after college, still the same car and inflation adjusted hourly income. Link to post Share on other sites
superconductor Posted August 14, 2006 Share Posted August 14, 2006 I agree, I'm attracted! Glad I'm not the only horny b@st@rd who noticed that! Another younger one was after the car and money... Unfortunately, this is all to common: a good relationship goes sour after she decides that she somehow "deserves" all the fancy trappings. It's strange, too, because I've seen situations over and over again where the guy works himself into ill health, then his wife complains that he never spends enough time with her and the kids. So, he does what she asks, spends more time at home, then she starts complaining that their lifestyle starts to suffer. No more European vacations, new car every 2 or 3 years, no more fancy shmancy jewelry... No matter what the guy does, he can't win. Work and supply her with all the trinkets, or spend more time at home but be unable to afford the goodies. Link to post Share on other sites
Author thekhris Posted August 14, 2006 Author Share Posted August 14, 2006 Just thought I would be the first one here to let you know Brittany Jean, apart from having a great smile (as previously noted) you have fantastic tits and so are you:D .. but sometimes very cold and distant Link to post Share on other sites
ImmaBeAlright Posted August 15, 2006 Share Posted August 15, 2006 When a woman leaves a man, it's always because of one single reason - a lack of attraction. It's not because she has found a new man. It's not because she doesn't trust her boyfriend or husband anymore. It's not because she thinks he is "too good for her." These are all EXCUSES that women use. The REAL reason for any woman to breakup with her lover is due to a LACK of ATTRACTION. Always. I want you to imagine a balance scale in front of you. On one side is whatever problem your relationship is facing. On the other side is a woman's attraction for you. If the attraction is greater than the negative forces, she'll stay with you. Otherwise, she's leave you in a heartbeat. It's as simple as that. Using this model, you can see how attraction is ALWAYS the underlying force that makes or breaks a relationship. If the attraction is high... 1) She won't leave you because you've made a tiny mistake. ("Mistakes" are just "excuses" for a woman to breakup with a man!) Even if you do make a mistake, if the attraction is great enough, she will forgive you. 2) She won't think you're "too good for her." 3) She won't choose her family, culture, or religion over you. 4) She won't fight with you everyday. And the list goes on and on... In short, if the attraction is strong, the chances of a woman staying in a relationship with you will be MUCH higher. Heck, if she likes you enough, you won't be able to pry her off with a crowbar. This is EXCATLY why most men are DEAD WRONG when it comes to fixing their relationships. They fight and beg and promise to "change themselves"...when the women they love is really NOT leaving them JUST because of whatever problem the relationship is facing...but because of a lack of attraction. Let's put it this way: The "reasons" for the breakup are merely the "symptoms"...the UNDERLYING cause is ALWAYS a lack of attraction, get it? So...how do you keep the attraction high? Dude, who died and made you Dr. Phil??? You need to sit down somewhere. I am a woman and agree with the women here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author thekhris Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 how many zillion times do i have to tell you..when I say attraction it s not based only in physical matters its more on what is your personality.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author thekhris Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 1) The protection of her most valuable asset -- Her Reputation. 2) Women want to FEEEEL a range of emotions. Do not try to make her happy, give her a full range from fury to ecstasy. This is a.k.a. her Drama Cookie. 3) Cater to the little girl in her. Know the difference when to ignore her ramblings and when she needs you to give her a hug. Sometimes she just needs to be reassured like a little kid. 4) Be dominant and take responsibility for leading the relationship. This includes making all the decisions, and taking 100% responsibility for the sex in the relationship. It all has to be the man's "fault". 5) She fears abandonment. This is part biological programming, as in the event she is left with a child, she needs to be sure that she will not be abandoned, and left alone to care for it. This covers her emotional need to feel secure. 6) Trust. The key here is if she can trust you to be honest with her; even if you know she will not like what you have to say. In a woman's reality, she is used to people lying to her ALL THE TIME because of the way she looks, or because they simply want something from her. If you are willing to piss her off with your honesty, you have demonstrated that she can trust you. 7) Her physical safety. A man must demonstrate that he is capable of protecting her physically from the threats of the outside world. This is to make her feel safe. 8) Women need to know you can handle her TRUE sexuality. She will only be as wonton with you as you demonstrate that you can handle. She needs to explore her sexuality and let it be free with you as a Natural Woman. 9) Prove that you have high quality sperm by showing other girls want to have sex (procreate) with you, and/or you are a "good catch" and her kids with you will also be a "good catch" enough to also attract a mate. 10) Prove that you are not a homosexual. She knows every homosexual male friend she has that is not out of the closet yet. Could you be one too? Regardless of what she tests you with, if you can spot one of these ten emotional needs in-between her words and you address that need by your communication and actions, you will pass the test, and she will by default feel attraction for you, and desire to be your lover. I think what happens in most relationships is that a man attracts a woman as his lover, and over time, she becomes more like his mother to him, thus sacrificing her attraction to him. In my unscientific-based opinion, that is when the relationship starts to die. That is my theory anyways. So far, it has worked for me, as you will read herein. There are a limited number of ways to pass her tests and address her emotional needs, but that is something for next time. Link to post Share on other sites
Interloper Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 I think thekhris has been reading too much David DeAngelo Link to post Share on other sites
Author thekhris Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 nah...david de angelo is for beguiners..and frequenly it failed try Sosuave.com.... you be in cathatonic:laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
swirly27 Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 I guess I see on 'some' level where attraction can be a key factor for women (being a woman myself). BUT......its not that black n white. I just ended a dating relationship with a guy that I was VERY much attracted to on almost all levels. He was very good looking, good in bed, always very sweet to me and talked to me like a person, very sensitive and hard working, etc etc. But, he wasn't reliable and I put up with it for a short time and then I had a final straw and ended it. So you're saying that based on my attraction being very high for everything else, that I would jave overlooked his unreliability....but I didn't. This breakup is hurting me more than him I believe...I wouldn't know though...but I did it and didn't want to, but I too didn't deserve the way things were going. God I miss him though and wish like hell things would have worked.....we could have been a really good thing, for many other reasons. Bottom line, there is no magic formula to anything....and there are always exceptions. There might be a majority rules kinda advice that rings true, but there will always be stories that go opposite of that and everyone perceives, acts and learns differently from every experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Humm ummm!!!! (If you’re religious, you'll probably think this is bunk) Nobody seems to mention the possibility that all this probably has to do with our instincts, evolution, and natural need to procreate. These natural elements don't give a rats ass about what you think, how you feel, what your religion is, or what your opinion is, it's all about survival, adaptation, and pro-creation. I think the confusion came in when humans became intelligent, our emotions were dealt in, and suddenly we were trying to figure out why we were doing things that we think are wrong. Other species living on this earth (with maybe the exception of a few), don't care how many partners they have, and move on to the next partner without hesitation. What I'm eluding to be that maybe were are genetically dispositioned to subscribe to more than one partner for the sake of evolving the species. However; as modern humans that have evolved into high intelligence, we need to understand that our actions do hurt other people, so it seems we keep struggling to find answers to why we hurt people, we get hurt by people, and who is right or wrong in the situations given. If you read this thread and others like it, you probably do like me and totally agree with one comment, then the next comment comes along where several other people disagree. Conversely, you may agree completely with one comment, and then another comment comes along with some contradictory truth about the previous statement. We will probably continue fighting with this problem for a very long time, or until we can evolve mentally and emotionally to override our natural instincts to evolve the species without hurting other people. My guess is that this will continue, and we will always be trying to figure out how to solve these kinds of issues. Humble Regards, Darwin Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 If evolution meant humans to procreate with anybody the way animals do, humans wouldn't get 'hurt feelings' when their partners chose others. You don't see a hen off in a corner weeping because the rooster serviced 86 other hens. The lioness doesn't go into a blue funk and eat a quart of Chunky Monkey because the male impregnated all the other lionesses in the pride. It's only humans that feel grief when their mates mate with others. Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Oops, I think you need to go back and read the post. That is exactly what I was conveying. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 read this post for more ideas how to fix loss of attraction http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t97828/ Link to post Share on other sites
heyduh Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 So...how do you keep the attraction high? read various ebooks by Carlos Xuma .. Link to post Share on other sites
Author thekhris Posted September 1, 2006 Author Share Posted September 1, 2006 i did last year Link to post Share on other sites
heyduh Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 thekhris there is no point reading the books out there, or posts and advice on these forums if you do not use it. most of the relationship psychology books will give you the same basic teachings ... i mentioned my favorites after reading tons. but if i don't use whatever i learned, there is no point in reading it. now here is the biggest problem .. everything is not going to work on every girl, but there are some basic things that will work on every girl (perhaps to different extent, but they will be useful) the key is to calibrate. what does that mean? you need to use feedback from her reaction (and her words, but mostly her actions) and use that to modify your approach in the future. the problem guys face when trying to win the girl back or trying to fix a relationship going downhill, is that they may use all these new tactics and it will be transparents .. she will "know" you are playing games ... so the best advice is focus on new love, not ex-love. but if you do want to focus on ex-love ... start at the very beginning .. as if it is a brand new relationship ... and EASE into using the new character traits of a REAL MAN that will keep the girl attracted long term. edit .. also wanted to add that people CHANGE. when i met the ex, she was at a low-esteem phase of life, i was semi-alpha (natural) .. towards the end of one year, i was clearly being domesticated and morphing into the supplicating wimp, while she was gaining in self esteem ... a few months later things started to go downhill ... soooo .. take these as a lesson for life. you must always keep evolving in a relationship .. when two of you evolve together, the relationship grows .. when one of you stop, or if two of you go in different directions .. best thing to do is end the relationship Link to post Share on other sites
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