Not happy with life and struggling to cope

[whichwayisup]

I'm glad that you are going to see a therapist. That's very brave of you and remember - With tomorrow, always brings the hope of a better day. Next time you are filled with negative feelings and thoughts, think of that. If you had done yourself in, you wouldn't have read all the caring and wonderful advice from so many here on LS. And, you wouldn't be seeing your son's face everyday. You have SO much to live for! Life is hard at times, but don't give up on yourself.

[Ariadne]

Hey guys,

 

I just showed this thread to my son and he barely looked at it and shook his head, "crazy mom" he said lol

 

I think he knows me more than all of you guys

 

Ariadne

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[kbah]

What does that mean? Have you felt this way b4?

[Ariadne]

Hi,

 

What does that mean? Have you felt this way b4?

 

Oh no. He just knows that I come up with crazy ideas all the time.

 

"That" is normal for mom (I guess what he meant).

 

Ariadne

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[Kirlin]

please..dont do it its pshyco..

 

i feel liek doing it all the time like jumping off a mountain but i dont because seriously who could follow thru with that meet someone new if u think u need love that bad.. but serously who really needs a man to be happy when yah got friends!! and your son should make u the most happiest woman..

 

dont kill urself this thread actually made me cry ..u must be in so much pain

i suggest seing a counsellor.. shell give u hotlines to different suacide lines to call... please promise me u wont do this everyone u no will be crushed even ppl that heard on the news or internet about this including me and do you really wanna let your son down?

[Ariadne]

Well,

 

I feel even "more" silly about this thread this morning.

 

Yes, it was psycho. I guess it is something people think about at some point or another, and in my case more times than others.

 

I never actually attempted suicide (at least that) but yes, I remember going to some beautiful cliffs here in California and in between enjoying the scenery I kept thinking...if I jumped, would I just die or become handicapped?

 

I was astounded by the amount of responses. I didn't expect that, but I guess it was an opportunity to reflect about this sad subject.

 

Is not so much that I'm miserable...I guess I'm more hopeless than anything and I can't find a good reason to live other than "to be there for my son."

 

But I guess that would do for now,

 

Ariadne

[Ariadne]

Hey you,

 

With tomorrow, always brings the hope of a better day. You have SO much to live for! Life is hard at times, but don't give up on yourself.

 

Thank you so much, you guys have been great

 

Ariadne

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[Mollyanna]

Is not so much that I'm miserable...I guess I'm more hopeless than anything and I can't find a good reason to live other than "to be there for my son."

That is exactly how I feel (except I have nieces, not a son). I have been struggling to get out of bed every day because I don't have a sense of purpose in this life. And nothing to be excited about, nothing to look forward to. So now I am working on finding some hobby that I like and thinking about changing jobs, and doing some volunteer work. Just find something Ariadne. What did you really like when you were a kid and weren't thinking about boys all the time? What made you want to live your day?

[Ariadne]

Hey,

 

I have been struggling to get out of bed every day because I don't have a sense of purpose in this life.

 

Hahah... I don't know what to do with myself either! I kid you not, but I was just looking at this page for Zen centers in LA so that I'd become a monk or some

 

And nothing to be excited about, nothing to look forward to.

 

Me too. I just wished I'd find a soulmate and share my life with him, but all alone like this I feel like I have nothing to do, nothing to look forward to. Besides, I have no hobbies, no nothing, everything sounds stupid to me (?)

 

Like what, fly airplanes? Who cares about that crap. Study geography? For what? Collect rocks? I mean, that is my problem too. I don't care for that junk.

 

Even my job was stupid, it had to do with war and coding things about missiles and yuck! I hated it.

 

Just find something Ariadne.

 

Sigh... yeah.... A monk I'll be...

 

What did you really like when you were a kid and weren't thinking about boys all the time? What made you want to live your day?

 

I would just climb trees and build stuff with the legos. I guess.

 

But I was always boy crrrrrrrazy, my "thing" was boys and that's it. I guess that's the only thing I care about. To find a soulmate, a twin soul, that. But then I found him and caput! There he went with some other girl.

 

Ariadne

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[Sup]

Hi,

 

your son will go from extreme sadness to intense anger (and back and forth between the two.) ---for many, many years. And when he has kids I think his emotions will kick into high gear. He'll never, ever get over this.

 

Thanks.

 

I just asked him, what would you do if mom suicides?

 

He said, don't say things like that, I'd be very very depressed... and looked at me scared.

 

And I don't think you want to put him through that.

 

I guess I'll have to put this off or to the back of my mind,

 

Ariadne

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PUTTING it completely out of YOUR mind would be better! About hurting yourself that is!

[Green]

You know who committed suicide, Hitler did, do you want to go out the same way he did? So you sound a little happier now but if something crappy happens like you get in trouble or something just remember to ask yourself what would Hitler do... he'd kill himself! Is that how you want to die the same way Hitler did? And oh yeah most people think about suicide it’s nice to know life is in your own hands, scary too but just don't do it kid hang in there you’ve got mauxy...

[Ariadne]

 

Yeah, and so did Marilyn Monroe and I'm a fan of hers.

 

But thanks,

 

Ariadne

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[Brittjean06]

adriane did you say you believe in reincarnation? Well if you do happen to kill your self than your new life will have alot of consequences for leaving your son.

 

Everyone has been so supportive here that should show you that there is alot of love around you, even on the computer? HOW CRAZY is that? Its great and if you are only 40 you still have alot of living to do. There will be a better day I'm glad to see you are responding and haven't gone through with what you first posted.

[Ariadne]

Hey you,

 

your new life will have alot of consequences for leaving your son.

 

Wow! I didn't think of that, that's a good point. (I mean, not in the "new life")

 

that should show you that there is alot of love around you, even on the computer? HOW CRAZY is that?

 

I know! I didn't think of that either But you are right. I guess that's a good sign. Maybe better things are going to happen to me, I hope.

 

Thanks so much!

 

Ariadne

 

Ps: I'm 38, don't scare me with the 4-0

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[Green]

her death officially ruled to be probable suicide by drug overdose has been the subject of much speculation and conspiracy theory. I don't think she killed herself its a conspiracy! and maybe Hitler isn't dead, he better not be reincarnated eh!

[Ariadne]

Well,

 

I think she did because she called Joe DiMaggio's son to say goodbye before she died.

 

But yes, there's a lot of speculation about it,

 

Ariadne

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[burning 4 revenge]

Adrienne, if that's you in your avatar, you're hot. What the hell do you mean you can't find love and you want to die?

[Apathetic]

You know who committed suicide, Hitler did, do you want to go out the same way he did? So you sound a little happier now but if something crappy happens like you get in trouble or something just remember to ask yourself what would Hitler do... he'd kill himself! Is that how you want to die the same way Hitler did? And oh yeah most people think about suicide it’s nice to know life is in your own hands, scary too but just don't do it kid hang in there you’ve got mauxy...

 

I heard he died from a drug OD

[Ariadne]

Hi,

 

Adrienne, if that's you in your avatar, you're hot. What the hell do you mean you can't find love and you want to die?

 

Thanks. Yeah, that'd be me. That pic is a few years old though, but I like it.

 

Is just that I want to find a twin soul, and that's the trick.

 

And I don't know, it gets so frustrating sometimes. But I don't want to die anymore now .

 

I'm going to play the piano

 

Ariadne

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[Touche]

Hi,

 

Adrienne, if that's you in your avatar, you're hot. What the hell do you mean you can't find love and you want to die?

 

Thanks. Yeah, that'd be me. That pic is a few years old though, but I like it.

 

Is just that I want to find a twin soul, and that's the trick.

 

And I don't know, it gets so frustrating sometimes. But I don't want to die anymore now .

 

I'm going to play the piano

 

Ariadne

 

What's this twin soul thing? Can you explain it to us? I'm not sure if there's really such a thing.

[leopardprint]

What's this twin soul thing? Can you explain it to us? I'm not sure if there's really such a thing.

 

I think I get what Ariadne is trying to say here.

 

I absolutely HATE when people say to me, "Oh get off it, what do you have to worry about, you're hot you can get guys!" Argh. First off, I wouldn't call myself "hot", but yeah - Sure, I can walk into a bar and get guys who wanna screw me just because I'm decent looking (just like they hit on every other pretty girl in the bar before me, and after I turn their yucky drunken selves down), but looks don't get you your bestfriend-significant other-lover-companion type of person. It's not so easy finding someone you can be COMPLETELY yourself with, have so many things in common, be intimite with, etc.

[burning 4 revenge]

I agree with Touche, I don't believe in soulmates. Degrees of comptability, certainly, soulmates, no.

[leopardprint]

I actually haven't decided on what I believe about soulmates yet, personally.

[burning 4 revenge]

I think I get what Ariadne is trying to say here.

 

I absolutely HATE when people say to me, "Oh get off it, what do you have to worry about, you're hot you can get guys!" Argh. First off, I wouldn't call myself "hot", but yeah - Sure, I can walk into a bar and get guys who wanna screw me just because I'm decent looking (just like they hit on every other pretty girl in the bar before me, and after I turn their yucky drunken selves down), but looks don't get you your bestfriend-significant other-lover-companion type of person. It's not so easy finding someone you can be COMPLETELY yourself with, have so many things in common, be intimite with, etc.

It makes it easier, because the number of guys interested will increase exponentially.

[Touche]

I think I get what Ariadne is trying to say here.

 

I absolutely HATE when people say to me, "Oh get off it, what do you have to worry about, you're hot you can get guys!" Argh. First off, I wouldn't call myself "hot", but yeah - Sure, I can walk into a bar and get guys who wanna screw me just because I'm decent looking (just like they hit on every other pretty girl in the bar before me, and after I turn their yucky drunken selves down), but looks don't get you your bestfriend-significant other-lover-companion type of person. It's not so easy finding someone you can be COMPLETELY yourself with, have so many things in common, be intimite with, etc.

 

You're right. It's NOT so easy as you say. I was 33 before I met the type of man you describe. Some have to wait a lot longer than I did...and some, sadly, never do at all. But good things never do come easily.