waitingforlove Posted August 11, 2006 Share Posted August 11, 2006 Hi everyone, Just for discussion: Do you think NC works if it's the dumper who initiates it? I mean, do you think the dumper will regret afterwards or want the dumpee back after NC if it's not the dumpee who implements it first? Link to post Share on other sites
johnnytable Posted August 11, 2006 Share Posted August 11, 2006 I think that the only way to answer this question is "maybe" which doesn't help much does it? NC is not about getting people back. Its about getting yourself back. Link to post Share on other sites
Ukwizard Posted August 11, 2006 Share Posted August 11, 2006 Hi WTL, That`s a really good question, but has so many varying degrees for a specific answer, or correct answer. I m not sure how you mean by the dumper doing no contact. The only reason I would see the dumper doing NC is either to get the dumpee to move on, or has found another love interest. I know this because this is what exactly happened to me. My ex, said the usual break up lines, and even said we`ll be friends, and go out for drinks, and have lunch together. I was in LC (low contact) back then, but now she has cut all communication. I think its hard for the dumpers too. They also want NC so they can concentrate on their new love interest, and to get you to move on. The dumpee on initiates NC to supposedly `heal` like they say in LS. I don`t think it works that way. When I did do NC it only lasted 1 week. Link to post Share on other sites
xxrubyredxx Posted August 17, 2006 Share Posted August 17, 2006 Hi everyone, Just for discussion: Do you think NC works if it's the dumper who initiates it? I mean, do you think the dumper will regret afterwards or want the dumpee back after NC if it's not the dumpee who implements it first? Who knows whether or not the dumper will want the dumped back or not. I guess that there will be instances when the dumper refuses contact with the dumped, only to have second thoughts further down the line and want to try again with the dumped. My ex was always actually the one to end our relationship....yet the first to run back. There were occasions I wouldn't see him for ages, then he'd resurface wanting to try again. But I didn't hang around awaiting him showing up....oh nooo! I was out enjoying myself meantime Link to post Share on other sites
toonicegirl Posted August 17, 2006 Share Posted August 17, 2006 Hi WTL, I think its hard for the dumpers too. They also want NC so they can concentrate on their new love interest, and to get you to move on. i agree with Ukwizard but what bothers me is the question: "so when dumper contacts the dumpee does it mean that his new love interest is not that interesting as he/she thought?" Link to post Share on other sites
ImmaBeAlright Posted August 17, 2006 Share Posted August 17, 2006 Hi everyone, Just for discussion: Do you think NC works if it's the dumper who initiates it? I mean, do you think the dumper will regret afterwards or want the dumpee back after NC if it's not the dumpee who implements it first? *I'll be blunt once again* You know what works, what works is for the dumpee to stop eating denial by the bowl and accept that they have been dumped, its over, finito. At that stage the dumpee can then do NC to get herself away from a relationship that is BROKEN and get back in touch with herself/himself. As the other poster said, NC isn't about getting someone back, its about getting YOU BACK. Link to post Share on other sites
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