Ariadne Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hey, Are you really upset to lose him? or are you just feeling rejected? No, just feel rejected I guess. Because I liked hanging at his house and I had a good time there. I'll miss that. Ok, good night you guys, Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
AriaIncognito Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Sorry you are feeling bad for talking to him now. Do you regret reaching out to him? Are you going to be OK with the things the way they are now, if they do not progress to a relationship? That is where I am. I know I need to accept that this is all I am going to get from D. There is no future because just like your D, my D has not changed. They still want the same things out of these relationships with us. Can we accept it and enjoy it for what it is? Or do we absolutely have to have more? I want more but I also want what I have and I am not willing to give that up. But I am not going to let myself get sucked up in the feeling again of "I love him so much that I will die without him". It's not that I feel bad from talking to him, I'm just feeling unsure as to whether or not anything will change for us if we become a we again. I'm trying to just go with the flow. I've seen him 3 times in the past 5 days I think, clearly something is there, I'm just not sure what. It's been nice. It's just hard to not know your status so to speak when you're used to being committed. I'm seeing him again thursday and probably saturday, so if he's seeing other people, well he isn't seeing them much lol. Part of me says to just stop worrying about who he might or might not be talking to, as he's also talking to me and spending a good deal of time on me. However there's the other part that says well, I shouldn't have to worry about anyone else. But, that's what it's like when you're not yet exclusive with someone. So I need to determine if i can handle it. Nobody can answer that for me, unfortunately. Just doing all i can to be no pressure and not try to analyze it all right now. I'll keep my eyes open. Jennifer Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Just doing all i can to be no pressure and not try to analyze it all right now. I'll keep my eyes open. Yep, that is what I am doing too. He called today from work and we talked for an hour. We made plans to do dinner and a movie on Thursday night. At one point in the conversation, he made a comment like "you and I, we keep it real. We are more than just friends." What the hell does that mean? I was too afraid to ask. I do not want to pressure him at all. It seems like when I don't talk about our relationship and I instead just have fun with him, he is very turned on and interested in me. But for all I know, we have become FWB and that is all we will ever be... Wow you guys are spending an awful lot of time together so quickly. Are you sure it is wise to jump back in like that? Protect yourself! Link to post Share on other sites
AriaIncognito Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Of course it's not wise lol. We just seemingly fell back to where we were. I'm sure it'll die down next week. For now I assume I should just enjoy, cuz who knows what'll happen... Jennifer Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Sounds good Jen. That is what I am doing. I just hope my mouth doesn't run away on its own and start talking about marriage and babies. Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hey... don't run off on me with those icky boys!!! -tp "SB" Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 I REALLY want to meet someone else now. How the heck do I do that without going to a bar? You are doing it now! Meeting people on the internet, even though it has a "stigma" attached to it, can be very rewarding. I've met so many amazing people online, friends, lovers, relationships..... You really are never "alone" online. Just look around you, sweetie. Look at all the friends you've made on here, and now translate that to the people you'd meet on a dating site... You are obviously very "loveable" (I sure think so!), you'll have no trouble starting up some conversations that could lead to anything! Since my breakup in June, I've gone out on at least a half-dozen dates, all with varying degrees of success. The best part is, as long as you come off as a decent person, finding an online date really isn't hard. I had a great first date (well, I wouldn't really call it a "date", per se) last week, since we met really just for a couple of drinks, though it was a LOT of fun, and my personal ads seem to get a lot of responses (amazing what "6 foot 4, 190lbs, athlete, owns own business, drives a Ferrari and is hung like a 2x4" gets you! :) Only problem is coming up with an excuse when the girl shows up and sees you are more "5 foot 8, made of donuts, corporate slave, drives a crappy Jeep, and is hung like an olive", but personality usually gets me by! ***that last part was for comedic purposes only, I'm hung like a gerkin, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!*** Seriously, I've met some wonderful people since my breakup, people I wouldn't have met if I was still with B getting my heart trampled on. Heck, I've met someone great people right here at LS! Sweetie, us great guys (yes, myself included THANK YOU!) are out there. You'll find the right one. I KNOW you will. Always your SB, -tp Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hey, So? How did you like the gym guy story? And how are things going with the hurricane over there? Is he worrying at least that you are safe and that kind of stuff? Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 TP: Thank you for your words of encouragement. I have been on dating sites but I only got the courage to meet 3 people. 2 people I didn't like and the other one didn't like me. That is the one that is throwing me. I remember talking to that guy for a couple of months online and on the phone and feeling this unmistakeable connection. I even warned him that I am not beauty queen and he saw pictures of me. I was so excited and when I showed up to meet him at the ice cream place, his face fell. I saw it. He tried to hide it, but I saw it anyway. I tried to make my personality overcome my little weight issue. (i was pudgy then, 5'5 160 lbs). It was embarassing and uncomfortable and I never want to go through that again. On MySpace I have had 3 guys ask me out in the past month and I have been putting them off. I'm scared. Even though I am now at 140 lbs, I still feel fat and want to wait to meet people after I lose 15 more pounds. I guess you can say my self-esteem is in the toilet. My personality is not great enough for people to see passed the physical. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hey, So? How did you like the gym guy story? And how are things going with the hurricane over there? Is he worrying at least that you are safe and that kind of stuff? Ariadne That gym guy reminds me of a guy I used to like. He's a jerk. Move on. He just wants to know you are interested in him. It is an Ego thing. Once he believed he could have you, he is not interested anymore. He is insecure. It is raining here but no hurricane. I am in Central Florida on the East Coast. Just not a good day for the beach, that's all. Here is a live feed near me: http://www.volusia.org/beach/daytona.htm Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 OMG hon... I've seen your picture. You are a cutie, and I MEAN that! Most guys who are jerks expect "their women" to be supermodels, while they themselves look like crap. Who do supermodels date? Other supermodels and rock stars. I'm sure none of these guys on Myspace qualify, so if it's a supermodel they want, they better learn to play guitar really well, and really fast! We've talked a lot online, you are funny, sweet, smart, and really cool. Screw (well, don't screw lol) those guys. My ex was 5'6" 170, and really attractive. She was about 250 at one time, before I met her, and I saw pictures of her then, and she was still cute. Remember.... bones are for dogs, real men prefer curves! Hang in there sweetie..... -tp P.S. At 5'8", 300+, ya think women are banging down MY door? I actually have to be funny and smart when I meet a chick! God forbid! Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hi, That gym guy reminds me of a guy I used to like. He's a jerk. Move on. Oh, you are clever. He "is" kind of a jerk. He is cocky and goes around the class talking to everybody kind of jack-a style... I didn't want to kiss him that time because it was pretty lame, but then I kind of questioned myself if he felt turned down or some. And the weight thing, isn't that something. Guys that look like total crap, like tp was saying, want Paris Hilton and no less. Oh no. It sucks. I had my ex bf (couple years ago, I wasn't in love tough) as my fwb and he was always ready...but then, he went to Asia to meet some girls that he met online, and after that he never wanted to see me again. He wanted Asian skinny girls only. It is raining here but no hurricane. I am in Central Florida on the East Coast. You know, I was thinking about that. I'd be really upset to have a hurricane come no less, and all that rain, and not be with him protecting me, holding me, watching the rain together. Oh, I'd be so pissed... How are you holding with that? Because it is kind of romantic. Thanks for the webcam, Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 It isn't raining hard and the wind is barely blowing. We really needed the rain so nothing to worry about. If there were thunder and lightening, THEN I would want him here, because there is nothing better than a man to cuddle with during a storm. I can always hope for that tomorrow, right? It is really odd, but the last few days I don't feel desperate or clingy or feeling the need to contact him a hundred times a day. I am not even thinking about him as much. Keeping busy with my own life. I wish I would have been this way in the early days of our relationship. Maybe he wouldn't have bolted. I know I was being extremely needy. I can't figure out this change in myself. Hope it lasts. You don't want some guy you have to chase Ariadne. Wouldn't you rather he chase you? Play the game. Ignore him and I bet he comes running! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 OMG hon... I've seen your picture. You are a cutie, and I MEAN that! Most guys who are jerks expect "their women" to be supermodels, while they themselves look like crap. Who do supermodels date? Other supermodels and rock stars. I'm sure none of these guys on Myspace qualify, so if it's a supermodel they want, they better learn to play guitar really well, and really fast! We've talked a lot online, you are funny, sweet, smart, and really cool. Screw (well, don't screw lol) those guys. My ex was 5'6" 170, and really attractive. She was about 250 at one time, before I met her, and I saw pictures of her then, and she was still cute. Remember.... bones are for dogs, real men prefer curves! Hang in there sweetie..... -tp P.S. At 5'8", 300+, ya think women are banging down MY door? I actually have to be funny and smart when I meet a chick! God forbid! I love you TP. That's all I have to say. *hugs* Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Hey, That's good. At least you have your plans for tomorrow and all of that. (I told you something would come up). And good that you are not all werided out wanting him like nuts. Oh, I've been drinking again and my ex husb 2 just came and brought food (for my bd on Fri) and I had a bit to eat and went to bed. I showed him the DVD Denver guy sent me that said: To ***, sweet, beautiful, and kind, - T. Oh, I'm freaking out again I think. Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 I love you TP. That's all I have to say. *hugs* I love you too! *hugs* Now if someone in the Metro-NYC area would say those words to me.....*sighs* Back to sulking, -tp Link to post Share on other sites
AriaIncognito Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 TP: Thank you for your words of encouragement. I have been on dating sites but I only got the courage to meet 3 people. 2 people I didn't like and the other one didn't like me. That is the one that is throwing me. I remember talking to that guy for a couple of months online and on the phone and feeling this unmistakeable connection. I even warned him that I am not beauty queen and he saw pictures of me. I was so excited and when I showed up to meet him at the ice cream place, his face fell. I saw it. He tried to hide it, but I saw it anyway. I tried to make my personality overcome my little weight issue. (i was pudgy then, 5'5 160 lbs). It was embarassing and uncomfortable and I never want to go through that again. On MySpace I have had 3 guys ask me out in the past month and I have been putting them off. I'm scared. Even though I am now at 140 lbs, I still feel fat and want to wait to meet people after I lose 15 more pounds. I guess you can say my self-esteem is in the toilet. My personality is not great enough for people to see passed the physical. DS - Just because 1 man thought you at 160 wasn't for him, that doesn't mean ALL men would have been that way. I'm an inch shorter than you, and well, I'm not even down to 160 yet, and I've found men to accept me at whatever weight. In my opinion, if they can't handle me at 180, then they dont deserve to handle me at 150. Maybe you should take on that same attitude. You definitely are a cutie, and such a great person, that any man would be dumb to pass you up, 140, 160, 200, or 300. :-) Love ya - FW :-) Link to post Share on other sites
AriaIncognito Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 I love you too! *hugs* Now if someone in the Metro-NYC area would say those words to me.....*sighs* Back to sulking, -tp I love you, TP ;-) I'm in NJ. I qualify. :-) Jennifer Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 I love you, TP ;-) I'm in NJ. I qualify. :-) Jennifer You most certainly do. :) And yes, I love you too! And wow...I don't have a followup to that statement, since you DID say you love me, you DO live in my area, and you ARE cute. Dammit, I can't think of anything funny now! But I'm always your SB, and you'll always be my FW. -tp Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hey Mollyanna, I've been thinking of something... I'm going to forget about men for a while. I'm going to be all alone and forget about dating, meeting someone new, and all that jazz. Because every man I meet is the same or worse than the one I met before. They suck. This fwb guy seemed to be so into me, called me every day, etc etc, and now look what happened. So, if I meet someone new most likely is going to be the same crap and it's not worth it. So forget men. (Hard for me to say since I am boy crazy...) So I'm going to watch movies, go to the therapist, work on getting a job, and try to lose weight because looking at it in a positive way, that Jamaican smoke only made me fat. Besides, I didn't care about that stuff until I started dating that guy, so I'll be the same as before. And I'm not going to drink anymore either. Because I'm crazy enough as it is. If I get drunk I end up doing things like the other night with the gym guy. Thank goodness I didn't leave the phone no. in his car! So? What do you think? Sigh... I feel relieved already! Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hey Mollyanna, I've been thinking of something... I'm going to forget about men for a while. I'm going to be all alone and forget about dating, meeting someone new, and all that jazz. Because every man I meet is the same or worse than the one I met before. They suck. This fwb guy seemed to be so into me, called me every day, etc etc, and now look what happened. So, if I meet someone new most likely is going to be the same crap and it's not worth it. So forget men. (Hard for me to say since I am boy crazy...) So I'm going to watch movies, go to the therapist, work on getting a job, and try to lose weight because looking at it in a positive way, that Jamaican smoke only made me fat. Besides, I didn't care about that stuff until I started dating that guy, so I'll be the same as before. And I'm not going to drink anymore either. Because I'm crazy enough as it is. If I get drunk I end up doing things like the other night with the gym guy. Thank goodness I didn't leave the phone no. in his car! So? What do you think? Sigh... I feel relieved already! Ariadne well, I say don't give up on men yet. I went on a date tonight with an internet guy. I didn't like him in that way, but I still had fun. It was nice to have someone laugh and smile at me. Made me feel good. So that isn't all bad. Maybe we should just date guys and not get into serious relationships yet? Free drinks and free dinners for a while isn't too bad. And it beats sitting at home entertaining myself all the time - too much pressure. I am not THAT amusing. I know all my jokes and stories already. Well the storm wasn't all that bad, but D did call and said he was checking on me in my very first tropical storm. Then he told me that his Ex is staying at his house for a couple of weeks on and off until she finds someplace to live. (since her boyfriend kicked her out.) He made a point of saying that he is not getting back with her and she knows that. He said he has a strong attachment to her since his Mom died. She is the only person in his life that has known him this long. (They were together for 12 years). I understand that and I am not TOO jealous, but she better be sleeping on the freaking couch as he said she is. Throughout the call he called me sweetie and baby and baby-girl over and over again. Doesn't it say something that he called me while she was there and also that he told me about her being there? That says we are more than just FWB, right??? We still have a date planned for tomorrow, although i did tell him i understood if he wanted to postpone it when he didn't have so much going on. Give up the smoke yes - and curb the drinking when you go to the gym. How do you exercise drunk???? It makes me want to run to Taco Bell! Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hey, well, I say don't give up on men yet. I went on a date tonight with an internet guy. You did!? Wow, good for you. That some progress... I didn't like him in that way, but I still had fun. It was nice to have someone laugh and smile at me. Made me feel good. So that isn't all bad. Yeah.... that's exactly why I was with the fwb. Because I had fun, and I laughed (at lot sometimes), and he made me feel good with all the attention and then, crap. Gym guy seemed so interested, wanted to know all about me, and then never talked to me again. Crap too. I mean, it isn't all that bad, at first, but then turns out bad most of the times. Maybe we should just date guys and not get into serious relationships yet? Free drinks and free dinners for a while isn't too bad. Well, but then they want to make out and you know what happens. Well the storm wasn't all that bad, but D did call and said he was checking on me in my very first tropical storm. Well, at least that. I'd have been really messed up if he didn't show some concern. Then he told me that his Ex is staying at his house for a couple of weeks on and off until she finds someplace to live. (since her boyfriend kicked her out.) Oh nooooo!!! I understand that and I am not TOO jealous, but she better be sleeping on the freaking couch as he said she is. Well, maybe he is friends with the ex (like the ex husb 2), but still, what a pest to have that woman there. Throughout the call he called me sweetie and baby and baby-girl over and over again. Hmmm... I think he was just feeling guilty for the hurricane thing. But maybe I'm wrong but that's what I get. Doesn't it say something that he called me while she was there and also that he told me about her being there? That says we are more than just FWB, right??? Well, he had to tell you she was there because it was inevitable that you'd find out. That guy is kind of a pain to say the least. But, he gives you that feeling when you are together and you enjoy being with him. So is more like you are stuck. We still have a date planned for tomorrow, although i did tell him i understood if he wanted to postpone it when he didn't have so much going on. Noo.... keep that date... You know how hard it is to get that guy to make dates. Give up the smoke yes - and curb the drinking when you go to the gym. How do you exercise drunk???? It makes me want to run to Taco Bell! Well, I just stopped every 5 mins to drink water. Ok, I'm going to watch a movie I rented now... Not a word from the fwb today. The hell with him. Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Oh, I had a IM conversation with my ex bf (the former fwb) that went like this: Ariadne says: is that why is my fault? Ex bf............ says: you don't get it? Ex bf............ says: because you tell a guy that was into you, that you don't like him, he's ugly, and there is no future Ex bf............ says: and you think he is going to be happy staying? Ariadne says: well he was having good sex Ex bf............ says: well, sex isn't enough sometimes Ex bf............ says: that's probably why he was still in it Ex bf............ says: you are rude and insensitive Ariadne says: but now he got a new booty Ariadne says: yeah, that is my fault, I told him, I was too blunt Ariadne says: but he said he liked that Ex bf............ says: they like blunt to a point Ex bf............ says: not to the rude insensitive level Ariadne says: yeah, I guess I don't know where to draw the line Ariadne says: but I can't bs him either Ex bf............ says: yes, you dont know where to draw the line ------------ So now I have to warn people. I'm blunt and insensitive. So sorry Mollyanna if I say something that offends you, I'm blunt, or whatever because I tell it like it is. But I don't mean to offend anyone. Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mollyanna Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 Ariadne: you haven't said anything to offend me. your suggestions are sometimes a little off the wall, but no harm. I know you are just a romantic. As long as you don't tell ME that I am ugly, we are fine. Anyway, who did you say that stuff to? The recent FWB or the guy before him? Wow, that IS a little harsh. What was the context of the conversation? D called me this morning to see if we are still on for tonight and to tell me he is looking forward to it. He even said I didn't have to go to the trouble of cooking for him, that he could bring takeout, And we are SOOO going to have good sex tonight! we have been passing sexy/x-rated text messages for days. That girl can go ahead and stay at his house - cause he won't be there tonight!!! I talked to our friend today and she said that girl is DEFINITELY trying to work her way back into a relationship with him. NOT going to happen. I bet it really pisses her off to know he will be with me tonight. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Hey, Anyway, who did you say that stuff to? The recent FWB or the guy before him? Wow, that IS a little harsh. What was the context of the conversation? Oh, I was talking to my ex bf of two years ago (the one that went to Asia to meet girls and didn't like me afterwards). We are still friends. I was just venting about the fwb guy that is dating someone else now, and he was telling me no wonder why... He says I'm insensitive because I tell the truth and sometimes I'm a little too truthful. I can't even tell the difference. Like the fwb would tell me, let's go spend a weekend together, let's go out of town... and I said, no. He says, why?! Because I don't like you. I know, I know, but I didn't want to spend the whole weekend with him. I mean, I liked going to his house and all, but is not like I loved the guy to be 24 hrs all weekend together Things like that. And the ex bf knows about that trait of mine so he says I'm insensitive. But I can't BS people, I don't like that. D called me this morning to see if we are still on for tonight and to tell me he is looking forward to it. Alright! That'd be fun. I talked to our friend today and she said that girl is DEFINITELY trying to work her way back into a relationship with him. Nah, maybe not. Since they were together for all that long, I doubt that they have "getting together issues" they probably went over all of those by now. But seems like you sure have to deal with women left and right with that guy... always something going on. Argh... gotta go now, running late, bye, Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
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