Lil' Jinx Posted January 11, 2002 Share Posted January 11, 2002 I found out about an hour ago that my friend died last night in his sleep. He is only 24 yrs old. The cause of death is yet to be announced. I feel numb right now. I feel like when I go visite his family tomorrow that he will be there. The reality of his death hasn't hit me yet. I feel guilty for not spending more time with him. He has been a very close friend of mine for five years and this last year we had not spent as much time together as we did in the past. My birthday is in two weeks. Last year for my birthday he gave me two gift certificates to go to the movies and a card. In the card he wrote about our friendship and how important it is to him. He spoke often about the importance of living life to the fullest and without regret. He never held a grudge. My friend became ill when he turned 18 and as a result was confined to a wheelchair. The doctor's never figured out what caused his sudden inability to walk. This didn't stop my friend from living. He was one of the happiest people I have ever met. He had house parties, went to the bars, dated beautifull women, went to college and held a job. He was always surrounded by many friends. My friend would sometimes say that he felt that he would not live long. This didn't ever appear to bother him. He wanted me to have a relationship with him. I was involved with someone else and wanted to be friends. This put a bit of a strain on things. He is a wonderful person, loved by many. I just needed a space to vent, thanks for listening. Lil Jinx Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 11, 2002 Share Posted January 11, 2002 I'm deeply sorry about the death of your friend. Do not for an instant feel guilt about the limited time you spent with him. You did what you had to do, especially under the circumstances of him desiring more from you than you could give. Life is just not fair. Some people live a very long life, filled with great and fulfilling relationships. Others tend to labor quite feverishly to that end and fail. But they are the architects of their own lives and they have their very own lessons to learn. The greatest gift God can give man is to go in his sleep. No pain, no suffering and not even the knowledge that one has gone. Your friend was lucky in that respect. We all have to go and we all will go at some point. It's unconditionally guaranteed. Life is pure uncertainty. Please read sparkle's post below and the responses. She is going through the very same experience you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Lil' Jinx Posted January 15, 2002 Share Posted January 15, 2002 Hello. Thank you Tony for your kind words and support. I went to my friends funeral. When I saw him lying in the casket, he had a huge smile on his face. He looked so happy and peaceful. I felt like I couln't cry because I remembered how much he enjoyed life, and I know that this is how he would want to be remembered. His parents said that he actually had a stroke and was in a coma, and that he died in his sleep. They said that if he had come out of the coma that "he wouln't be there". The minister gave the eulogy and stated that the past four months have been the happiest of my friends life. I trust that my friend is longer suffering from his disease which the doctor's didin't really know anything about. I trust that my friend is in a better place free from sickness and disability. I believe in God. My belief has guided me through this. After the funeral, my pregnant friend went into labour for her first child. Thank you, Lil' Jinx Link to post Share on other sites
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