Guest Posted August 21, 2006 Share Posted August 21, 2006 Me and my fiance have been together for two years. We live together and we are expecting a baby anytime now. She has an 8 year daughter from a previous marriage. Problem is that there is this guy who lives a few doors down who I think has started to pay some interest in her. I don't know why because it's just started to happen. My fiance has been known to flirt and I have pulled her about this a few times. She know that I won't tolerate this otherwise go get some moron who will tolerate it. She took some ice pops and stuff when it was really hot a few weeks back and this guy was one of the recipients. Then the other day she asked if her daughter could borrow a pump for her bike so his daugther brought it over for me to use. Lo and behold this guy was then standing in the garden saying "Oh I didn't realise you were here so I just thought I would try to lend a manly hand" Yeah right. Then a day later my fiance was stood at the bus stop with her daughter and this guy pulls up and offers them both a lift into town. She declines but he insisted. So like fools they both got in and accepted the lift. Now this morning I looked out of my bedroom window and noticed this guy stood there naked. To me he sounds like a perve who likes to try and steal other people partners, or just likes to ruffle his feathers. Should I be bothered about him, or should I keep a close eye on him and knock him out if he tries anything again! He is a cop by the way which is why I have not yet confornted him yet! Link to post Share on other sites
britchick Posted August 22, 2006 Share Posted August 22, 2006 He was standing there naked???!!! Was he outside naked? If so, call the police on him (even if he is one). This is really bizarre. If your wife is heavily pregnant, I doubt she's got any interest in this man, when I was pregnant, the last thing on my mind was men. Why not talk to your wife about it, starting with "You know our wierd neighbour......" Perhaps, she feels intimidated by him but feels it is difficult to tell you because you are then in a position where you feel you have to do something about it. Talk to her about it and see how she feels. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 22, 2006 Share Posted August 22, 2006 He was standing there naked???!!! Was he outside naked? If so, call the police on him (even if he is one). This is really bizarre. If your wife is heavily pregnant, I doubt she's got any interest in this man, when I was pregnant, the last thing on my mind was men. Why not talk to your wife about it, starting with "You know our wierd neighbour......" Perhaps, she feels intimidated by him but feels it is difficult to tell you because you are then in a position where you feel you have to do something about it. Talk to her about it and see how she feels. Good luck. He was standing naked in the window upstairs. I told me fiance and she said "you are joking" I take your point about being heavily pregnant and stuff but you don't know my fiance. I have taken advice off various forums so I think I will just see what happens. At the end of the day she would be pretty stupid to do anything. That's she feels inclined once the baby is born. I would leave her like a shot and that would mean, drop daughter of at weekend to see her dad, and the after that drop son of to be with me. Now that would not look good to her new potential boyfriend would it! Link to post Share on other sites
britchick Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Even standing naked at the window is a bit odd isn't it? He sounds quite creepy. Is your fiance in the habit of going off with other men? Just asking because it sounds like it from what you have said - and that's a whole other issue! Is it his behaviour or hers that you're worried about? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Even standing naked at the window is a bit odd isn't it? He sounds quite creepy. Is your fiance in the habit of going off with other men? Just asking because it sounds like it from what you have said - and that's a whole other issue! Is it his behaviour or hers that you're worried about? I am only basing on what she has told me in the past. The fact that she did cheat on her husband, but it was not a happy marriage anyway. I think it's that fact that she may cheat. And again, I can only base this on what I did see very early on in our relationship. She never atcually cheated but she very much enjoyed the attention this guy was giving her. Nothing ever happened but I am sure it would have had they been alone together for an evening. But she has not yet done anything to make me wonder about her until now. It seems to go in fits and starts. I am worried about this guy because I think he has some nerve even to think he has a chance with her, that's if that was he was thinking in the first place. Hence the title am I over reacting? Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Did you say you believed that something would have happened with this other guy if she was left alone with him for an evening? This is very bad if you believe this because what you are saying is that the only reason she has not cheated on you with this guy is because she did not have the opportunity to be alone with him. Am I reading this correctly? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Did you say you believed that something would have happened with this other guy if she was left alone with him for an evening? This is very bad if you believe this because what you are saying is that the only reason she has not cheated on you with this guy is because she did not have the opportunity to be alone with him. Am I reading this correctly? This is the guy she flirted with about 2 years ago. And yes, I believe something would have happened if they had been alone together. You have to give and take and say it was a one off though. Not the guy who is standing naked in the window and offered her a lift and all of that. I think to some this all up. With her history and what happened two years ago and then this episode with this guy offering her a lift bla bla bla it just brings back memories of 2 years ago and I think the pattern will repeat itself. Or am I just over reacting? Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 Since he's a cop play this carefully, some can abuse their power, especially if you tick this guy off. However, no chick with a bf should be accepting rides from other dudes unless she's stranded out on the road or something, which this chick wasn't. Tell her to have no contact with this man and see how she takes it. Tell her if he attempts to hang out with her or give her rides to refuse and if need be, she should say something like "I have a bf, this isnt appropriate behavior" See what she says, if she throws a fit, then you know somethings up. If she doesnt, watch her for the next week or two. I find sometimes even when a chick says she wont see a dude, she conveinently finds excuses to do so, like for example him giving her a lift. So if she is ok with no contact, see if in the next few weeks that somehow manages to contact this guy. If she does, you shouldnt marry this chick. Link to post Share on other sites
britchick Posted August 26, 2006 Share Posted August 26, 2006 It's a bit worrying, but only in the context of other things you describe. Is she really untrustworthy or do you think you are the jealous type? Link to post Share on other sites
cesarmami Posted August 27, 2006 Share Posted August 27, 2006 You should absolutey contact the authorities. Some men have sexual perversions toward pregnant women and you should be extremely concerned that your fiance and her child got into a car with this man. She is obviously not being firm enough becuase, no matter how many times someone offers, she should be able to refuse a ride from a strange man. This is a terrible example to set for her daughter! This man may not be dangerous, but is at the very least acting extremely innappropriate. I think this has little to do with your fiance cheating and more to do with her not being able to make it clear to this man that his attention is unwanted. If she is not capable of this, you should do it yourself, for her and her daughter's sake. Link to post Share on other sites
Roo Posted August 27, 2006 Share Posted August 27, 2006 ok so do I have this right, she's your finace, you intend to marry her, but you do not trust her and feel she would cheat on you if the right opportunity came along?? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 ok so do I have this right, she's your finace, you intend to marry her, but you do not trust her and feel she would cheat on you if the right opportunity came along?? Yes, I'm just not 100% sure. There is a nagging feling right in the very back of my mind. Am I over reacting? Link to post Share on other sites
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