melina Posted August 22, 2006 Share Posted August 22, 2006 HI I got married a few months ago and my husband is actually a good catch. There is just one thing that drives me mad; he's still in contact with his ex. She's married and has two children but unfortunately she belongs to the close circle of his friends and our paths cross sometimes. She lives in Singapore so we hardly see her but my husband goes on a business trip to Asia once a year and then usually meets up with her. She was also at our wedding which caused massive fights between my husband and me. There is nothing I can do really as I won't "forbid" my husband to ever see her again. It's just so painful to think about what they shared together and how he somehow is such an insensitive dick to not see how I feel. what should I do? Just bear it? Link to post Share on other sites
Layla Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 I can't see why your husband is so insensitive as not to see how much you suffer! Why does the friendship with this woman mean more to him than your feelings?! I would really talk to him and tell him that he's acting in a selfish way and that it puts a serious strain on your marriage. good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
rebekka Posted August 24, 2006 Share Posted August 24, 2006 why are you so upset about him still being in contact with his ex? He married you, in front of her eyes. I can't see any threat from her side. It rather sounds to me that you have a confidenc problem. I would find an old ex much less threatening than say a hot chick he works with in his office. Enjoy your marriage and stop worrying girl! Link to post Share on other sites
Author melina Posted August 27, 2006 Author Share Posted August 27, 2006 thanks for your answers. I don't think that my being upset has got anything to do with being insecure; I just find it respectless of my husband to still see his ex even though he know how much it hurts me. Why can't he just make a choice and not see her again?! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 29, 2006 Share Posted August 29, 2006 My advice - this will be hard, but smile and perhaps even extend the hand of friendship to her. This will make you super reasonable and the "good guy". Keep friends close, (potential) enemies closer! If there is any hint that they are overstepping the mark of friendship, stamp on it immediately. I dont feel you have anything to worry about from this woman. I would say to him - You know I have had problems accepting this friendship, but I will try to do so because I love you. There will be some ground rules though. Contact with her should never happen without my knowledge, I dont want to feel you are more intimate with her than me in any way, (so no long involved conversations I am not a party to) and I want you to always make it clear to her that you are 100 per cent committed to me. (Marrying you in front of her was a good start!) Link to post Share on other sites
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