Has anyone had someone come back ?

[Cathy]

Hi All-

 

Out of curiosity I was wondering if anyone has ever had someone come back. I've read many many posts about people wanting their exs back but I was wondering if anyone has actually had an experience where someone did come back and why, how, etc. In your experience, do you find that they come back once you have moved on and have lost the feelings you once had for them?

 

Thanks so much !

[Anthony]

Well i seriously doubt that anypone can give you a personal account of such a situation but rather on what has hapened to their relatives etc...

 

My grand parents were married and divorced and married... so on and so on to and from each other quite a few times.. but i dont know if that counts.

Hi All- Out of curiosity I was wondering if anyone has ever had someone come back. I've read many many posts about people wanting their exs back but I was wondering if anyone has actually had an experience where someone did come back and why, how, etc. In your experience, do you find that they come back once you have moved on and have lost the feelings you once had for them?

 

Thanks so much !

[tkgirl]

First, to Anthony: Why do you seriously doubt that anyone that posts here has been in a situation that Cathy asks about? I just found it odd that you said that...

 

And now, to Cathy: Yes, I have been in that situation, more than once actually. My experience has been...well the obvious one where I've broken up with someone because things weren't working out, then all of a sudden they want me back and want to work things out, etc. One boyfriend didn't even talk to me for a couple months after we broke up. I thought he had moved on, then all of sudden out of the blue he calls me and wants to try to patch things up. We tried, it didn't work... Now there's a guy in my life that I've seen off and on. We got along great at first, but weren't really a "couple". Then he practically disappeared from my life...only to come back 6 months later and wanted to be with me again! He sort of broke my heart at first, but I still liked him when he "came back" so here I am, seeing him again. Only now I realize that he'll never be a serious thing, but he's still fun to hang out with once in a while.

 

I think some people just don't really know what they want, or people just want different things at different times. Timing has a lot to do with how relationships work out sometimes.

[Anthony]

Well to me it seems to be similar question (by propability of situation) to

 

"has anyone ever had their limb torn off while hangin it out side of car widow?" to that everyone whom answers most

 

likely gives the reply of .. "i had a friend of a friend..."

 

or "my cousin so and so...." i meant nothing more by that comment. I know has nothing to do with the specifics of the original question but just trying to make my point of it all.

 

But as you pointed out the relationship never worked out after you and your exboyfriends brokeup and got together again. My point was to the situation that if they had goten separated from each other dated around and goten back together permanently that a situation of such nature would be highly unlikely.

 

But then again that was just my understanding of the situation mentioned in the original query.

 

As to letting the go and them coming back again well with most people after having ones heart broken... how much bitter ness would you suppose would be left after that towards the person that left. When in turn they came back and if the other person were able to overcome the bitterness over the pain.. there is allways the reason of why did the other leave in the first place and is there anything that would stop it from hapening again.

 

It might work for a while on the second try but it in most cases wont last.

 

As i mentioned the situation with my grandparents

 

that might be comparable to your situation... in a way...

First, to Anthony: Why do you seriously doubt that anyone that posts here has been in a situation that Cathy asks about? I just found it odd that you said that... And now, to Cathy: Yes, I have been in that situation, more than once actually. My experience has been...well the obvious one where I've broken up with someone because things weren't working out, then all of a sudden they want me back and want to work things out, etc. One boyfriend didn't even talk to me for a couple months after we broke up. I thought he had moved on, then all of sudden out of the blue he calls me and wants to try to patch things up. We tried, it didn't work... Now there's a guy in my life that I've seen off and on. We got along great at first, but weren't really a "couple". Then he practically disappeared from my life...only to come back 6 months later and wanted to be with me again! He sort of broke my heart at first, but I still liked him when he "came back" so here I am, seeing him again. Only now I realize that he'll never be a serious thing, but he's still fun to hang out with once in a while. I think some people just don't really know what they want, or people just want different things at different times. Timing has a lot to do with how relationships work out sometimes.

 

[Cathy]

Thanks for your response, I appreciate it. As for you and this new guy, are you together or just seeing each other? Why did he leave in the first place? It kinda sounds like you sit back and let them come to you?

First, to Anthony: Why do you seriously doubt that anyone that posts here has been in a situation that Cathy asks about? I just found it odd that you said that... And now, to Cathy: Yes, I have been in that situation, more than once actually. My experience has been...well the obvious one where I've broken up with someone because things weren't working out, then all of a sudden they want me back and want to work things out, etc. One boyfriend didn't even talk to me for a couple months after we broke up. I thought he had moved on, then all of sudden out of the blue he calls me and wants to try to patch things up. We tried, it didn't work... Now there's a guy in my life that I've seen off and on. We got along great at first, but weren't really a "couple". Then he practically disappeared from my life...only to come back 6 months later and wanted to be with me again! He sort of broke my heart at first, but I still liked him when he "came back" so here I am, seeing him again. Only now I realize that he'll never be a serious thing, but he's still fun to hang out with once in a while. I think some people just don't really know what they want, or people just want different things at different times. Timing has a lot to do with how relationships work out sometimes.

 

[Anthony]

I suppose im the new guy you mean

 

well i have never been in the situation mentioned but i have seen it a few times...

 

ie my grand parents whom i mentioned had that years ago... and there is a friend whom went trough something similar...

 

in any case never worked out.

Thanks for your response, I appreciate it. As for you and this new guy, are you together or just seeing each other? Why did he leave in the first place? It kinda sounds like you sit back and let them come to you?

[tkgirl]

okay, I'm probably going to sound like a total b*&%$ here, but I think Cathy was asking me about MY situation...?

 

So here it is: This "new guy", we are not TOGETHER together (if that makes any sense). It originally started off with a few dates, then he stopped calling. I was bummed but moved on. I even heard he had a girlfriend. Then a few months later he called again and now we see each other off and on, but I wouldn't call him my boyfriend. I guess my attitude is that if it was meant to be it will happen. I'm trying to learn how to not take things so seriously and just have fun. Sometimes it's hard because I would like to find a boyfriend, but you just can't force things to happen like that. Anyways, I hope that cleared things up for you. What is your situation? Did you break up with someone and are wanting them back, or you're wondering what might happen next? In my situations (as Anthony pointed out) is that when I have tried getting back together after a breakup, it didn't work out. And I'm not so sure what's going to happen with this guy yet either, but... I guess what I'm trying to say is every situation is different. You never know how things might turn out, but (to repeat myself) if it was meant to be it will happen

Thanks for your response, I appreciate it. As for you and this new guy, are you together or just seeing each other? Why did he leave in the first place? It kinda sounds like you sit back and let them come to you?

[cinsi]

I try to break up with my b/f every few months. I think its a personal problem on my part because our relationship is great and I want to marry him. I am trying to figure out how to fix my problem.

 

I recently broke up with him and made him move out. Now we are back together and he lives 30min away. the relationship is going really really good now. this last time we broke up I dated other people which just caused me to realise that he is better for me than all of the other guys. so maybe I am cured of thinking there may be better out there, although I find it hard to believe it could be that simple. ugg! Its a huge problem for me! I am with the guy I want to marry but obviously he is nervous b/c of my previous break up attempts.

 

I need a shrink but am broke and dont have insurance.

 

any advice for me???? how do I work this out? ?

First, to Anthony: Why do you seriously doubt that anyone that posts here has been in a situation that Cathy asks about? I just found it odd that you said that... And now, to Cathy: Yes, I have been in that situation, more than once actually. My experience has been...well the obvious one where I've broken up with someone because things weren't working out, then all of a sudden they want me back and want to work things out, etc. One boyfriend didn't even talk to me for a couple months after we broke up. I thought he had moved on, then all of sudden out of the blue he calls me and wants to try to patch things up. We tried, it didn't work... Now there's a guy in my life that I've seen off and on. We got along great at first, but weren't really a "couple". Then he practically disappeared from my life...only to come back 6 months later and wanted to be with me again! He sort of broke my heart at first, but I still liked him when he "came back" so here I am, seeing him again. Only now I realize that he'll never be a serious thing, but he's still fun to hang out with once in a while. I think some people just don't really know what they want, or people just want different things at different times. Timing has a lot to do with how relationships work out sometimes.

 

[tkgirl]

I think talking to a trained therpist is definitely a good idea. You need to understand what is causing this behavior in you. I am a strong believer in therapists. I think it is really helpful to talk to an "outsider" who can give you their viewpoint of things. Have you tried any of the "free clinic" type places? Lots of times you can go see someone there and all they ask for is a donation, if you can afford one. Good luck!

I try to break up with my b/f every few months. I think its a personal problem on my part because our relationship is great and I want to marry him. I am trying to figure out how to fix my problem.

 

I recently broke up with him and made him move out. Now we are back together and he lives 30min away. the relationship is going really really good now. this last time we broke up I dated other people which just caused me to realise that he is better for me than all of the other guys. so maybe I am cured of thinking there may be better out there, although I find it hard to believe it could be that simple. ugg! Its a huge problem for me! I am with the guy I want to marry but obviously he is nervous b/c of my previous break up attempts. I need a shrink but am broke and dont have insurance. any advice for me???? how do I work this out? ?