Midnight Tear Posted August 28, 2006 Share Posted August 28, 2006 I'm 24 and very confused. In November of last year I ended a 3 year relationship with an older man who had two children from a previous relationship. I vowed to stay single to have time to myself because I have always been in long relationships. But then in January of this year, I met another man (he lives 3 hours away) and things moved quickly, we had just met and then we were together all of a sudden, I didn't know how to stop it. He's a great man, but also older and has two children froma previous partner! However, between the time of my ex and my new boyfriend, I was introduced by email to a friend of a friend who lives a few hours away. We only talked on line, the phone and through email, exchanged pics as well. He was gorgoeus and exciting, just what I needed. But before we could meet, I met my new partner and....well that was the end of that. We did end up meeting, once, and went out for a night together (nothing happened, we were with a group of friends). I am very attracted to this man and interested in him, however he lives quite far, has a different life and I don't know him all that well. My new partner is nice but he was "in love" with me so fast and I couldn't say it back to him, I don't know if it was because I feel like I fell into the same situation I got out of (older man, kids) or because it happened to fast. Right now I feel confused because I feel so guilty thinking about and wondering about the other man I only met once, when I am with my partner. Realistcally I don't think we could have anything because he is so far and different lifestyles, but my mind still lingers over him..... Should I ruin a relationship I have now for a "maybe"......I would hurt my partner a great deal, not to mention a lot of our close friends.... I used to be very good in relationships, but now I feel I am all over the place and can never really understand my feelings. It is confusing and frustrating............ Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted August 28, 2006 Share Posted August 28, 2006 Sounds to me like you are not ready to have a committed relationship, which is fine. I think that if not all, most of us need to experience that time in our lives to have fun and be single, so that you can get it out of your system before you settle down in the long run. I would say to end any committed relationship that you have and enjoy the single life. You have plenty of time to meet someone to settle down with. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted August 28, 2006 Share Posted August 28, 2006 I think you should listen to your gut instincts which led you to your vow to stay single and be on your own for a while. By being interested in men who are 'a few hours away' - geographically unavailable men, men who aren't around for a full-time relationship - you are effectively staying out of a full-time relationship while still having the fall back of being in a relationship. Try being on your own for a while and see how that fits. When you start falling for guys who are nearby and can really be in your life, then you'll know you're ready to date again. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts