Call from ex

[Ukwizard]

Hi there again. Well I m back to get some some advice, or peoples opinions.

 

I m not sure if anyone remembers me being on here, but a little bit of the background.

 

My ex split up with me in October 2005. She`s currently dating someone else now, and met him around the beginning of May 2006. She`s stil with him now. During that time before she met this new man, she had seen 2 other people. I was trying to retrieve our relationship up until she met her current man. I also met someone else, but nothing came out of it, and split up with her about 2 weeks ago.

 

I have to say here that my ex who I split up with in October hasn`t spoken to me since the 22 May 2006.

 

I do send the occasional email to her, and other than that I ve not heard from her until tonight. I recieved a phone call on my mobile, and it was her. I left it, as it was a shock to me. We haven`t spoke for around 3 months.

 

I texted after 5 minutes saying it was a nice surprise hearing from her, and not heard from her in ages, and I was driving. (which wasnt true. I was at home). I left it to see if she would call back, and sure enough, after half an hour she called back.

 

I found out it wasn`t actually her. When I answered the second time. All I heard was her daughter laughing, and giggling. It was her 11 year old daughter that got hold of the phone, and called me! I could hear my ex in the background asking for her daughter to hand the phone back.

 

About five minutes later I get a text saying "Sorry was sat on the phone! Didn`t mean to call!"

 

Obviousily she must have been talking about me to her new boyfriend on the landline about me. I had sent her an email the day before. What do you think I should do?

 

I`d like some feedback.

 

Please don`t give one liners to leave it. Of course, I can leave it. General advice, and opinions would be useful.

[SwayLady]

Your ex has obviously been talking about you to her ex, or to someone, because an 11 year old child (I wouldn't have thought), doesn't take it upon themselves to call their mothers ex boyfriend for no reason. The fact that her daughter was laughing and giggling at the other end, suggests to me that the child was purposely being mischievous.

 

It could be that your ex was telling her new bf, that she recieved an email from you yesterday, the daughter has overheard and as a joke her daughter has grabbed the phone and rang you.

 

When you email your ex, doesn't she mail back?

 

If not, then I can't understand for the life of me, why you continue to email her when she doesn't even bother replying. The last thing I'd do is continue to mail an ex, if I wasn't recieving a reply. Knowing my ex and if he didn't want to hear from me, he'd delete his addy probably so that I couldn't mail back again, but your ex isn't, so she's obviously flattered/recieving an ego boost from your continuing attention of her. And if she is informing her ex you are emailing, which it sounds like she may be, then she's trying to make him jealous IMO.

 

What should you do? Well not mail back, for one!

 

If she wants you, she knows where to reach you.

 

Probably not much help, but you've been there for me with opinions and advice when I need it

[Ukwizard]

Thank you Swaylady. I think you are 100% right. She sometimes has her children stay with her. I know this because when I went out with her, her kids stayed every couple of days.

 

The thing is that she talks to people on the phone while her kids are in the same room. The living room. Now for me, I would go to another room for some privacy.

 

an 11 year old child (I wouldn't have thought), doesn't take it upon themselves to call their mothers ex boyfriend for no reason.

The fact of the matter is that, I recieved two phone calls on my mobile. I assume now that both are from her youngest daughter. I didn`t answer the first time, but it did ring significantly.

 

The fact that her daughter was laughing and giggling at the other end, suggests to me that the child was purposely being mischievous.

Correct again sway lady, because when I did answer the second time, I heard her youngest daughter giggling. She must have had hold of the phone, because everything sounded muffled. I actually heard my ex-girlfriend ask her Her daughter) to give the phone back.

 

So thank you for your advice. I wont call her back. I actually thought something was wrong. She had a few problems with her youngest child when I was with her. They used to be fight each other all the time.

 

I m just surprised she even texted me at all. Usually she`d just blank me.

 

To answer you question. When I email my ex. She doesn`t reply anymore. I m okay with that. Sometimes I send written emails, and sometimes just jokes, and attachments. I don`t give up on people that easily. I guess you`re right. One day I will stop. I m on the look out for a new girlfriend. Maybe thats when it will happen!

 

The ex comes sniffing about when the emails, and phone calls stop to find out what happened, and why you stopped. Lol

[SwayLady]

 

I don`t give up on people that easily.

 

Do you think you may still have a chance with her? Has she ever given you a second/third chance, or given you reason to think that there may be another chance? I'm tending to think that because you havn't given up on her easily, that it's because you think that there may still be another chance with her.

 

We've heard that saying, 'If at first you don't succeed,try and try again'. But me, well I'm one of those people who lives by, 'If at first you don't succeed, give up'...LOL! If I don't hear back, then I take it as a hint that the other person does not want to hear from me and I've cleared off, as I did when I last emailed the ex and he didn't mail back. Figured that he just didn't want to hear from me at all and now, as much as I want to mail, I daren't mail back because I feel like I'd be imposing on him and he'd think I was being a nuisance. Sometimes though I think, do I give up too easily, which is why I lose out.

 

I guess you`re right. One day I will stop. I m on the look out for a new girlfriend. Maybe thats when it will happen!

 

Hmm, well I went on to meet my ex H, after me and the ex split, but I never ever completely forgot the ex. Just got caught up in the new R with my ex H and thought of the ex less. Your contacting her would very likely stop when you meet someone else and you'll likely meet that special person when you are least expecting it, it always happens that way.

 

The ex comes sniffing about when the emails, and phone calls stop to find out what happened, and why you stopped. Lol

 

It's normally when we stop pursuing, that they come pursuing us. When we stop emailing/calling, it gets the better of their curiosity and they wonder what happened to us. That is when they can come calling. Personally I'd have to test your ex in this way. Just stop the mails altogether and see what happens.

[Ukwizard]

Thanks again for your input SwayLady. I really appreciate your comments.

 

To be truthful, my ex is a very confused woman. Sometimes she doesn`t think before she says anything. I ll answer your question first. I don`t know if I will get back with her. I don`t even know for sure if I want her back at all. Although, I still think about her. Its not as much as before.

 

The reason is when we split up, (I nearly got her back!) that she never took anyone back before. I found out after a few months, she`s back in contact with one of her ex`s! The first man she dated!! I was the third man! (she`s on her sixth boyfriend in around 18 to 21 months after being separated from a 12 year marriage). She even after a few more months said, `Why don`t you date other people first, and then come back to me!`. Yeah right! I come second best then! Also I thought she said she never took anyone back! So you see what I mean. A very confused woman. So I don`t take what she says as for sure.

 

Do I want her back? Well, not as much as before. Remember I ve dated someone else. If I find someone else then thats all the better. I can`t get her back now as she`s dating someone.

 

She did say when we broke up `lets stay friends, and we`ll go out for meals, and drinks every now and again`. None of which ever came true. What a lot of tosh!

 

One day, I will stop pursing. I know human curiosity dictates that they will try to contact you to find out what happened to you. When I split up with my last girl before my ex. I had a strange inkling wanting to find out how she was doing. I know back about 3 months ago, my ex went onto Friendsreunited. A site that reunites old friends. She, emailed me to update my profile as it mentioned her. I totally forgot about my old profile. Obviousily she went sniffing about.

 

She wanted to be friends then fine. I will be her friend. Let it be a curse to her. Lol