Mary3 Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 What are the odds that a young couple only knowing eachother 3 months and getting pregnant and then married the next month , that it will all work out ? They are early 20's.... Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 What are the odds that a young couple only knowing eachother 3 months and getting pregnant and then married the next month , that it will all work out ? They are early 20's....What are the odds that any couple that's getting married works out? There are no odds, Mary. Sure it sounds like their chances are pretty slim, but none of us is just a dot in the statistics. If they happen to be good people, consistent in their characters and decisions, willing to work on their marriage and deeply in love - their chances are good, whether they're 20 or 40, been together for 3 months or 30 months. Many of the couples you see who have been married for over 40 years have known each other very little prior to marriage. P.S. Besides, they alredy are pregnant. Whether they will marry or not won't make it less of a huge change in both their lives! I am sure they're getting married because they're in love. Is it wise what they are doing? No. But "wise" refers to how much they already know each other and how ready they are for this move. When you talk about "odds" it's bad prognosis based on the fact that they can't know if they're right for each other at this point. Not knowing someone well doesn't mean they're bad. Don't play a psychic. They won't appreciate your doubts. Link to post Share on other sites
Buttaflyy Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Doesn't sound too promising to me. They've got so much to learn about each other, and a very trying time to do it. Some women are hellish during pregnancy, what a way to get to know your new wife. It can work tho, to each it's own. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 What are the odds that any couple that's getting married works out? There are no odds, Mary. Sure it sounds like their chances are pretty slim, but none of us is just a dot in the statistics. If they happen to be good people, consistent in their characters and decisions, willing to work on their marriage and deeply in love - their chances are good, whether they're 20 or 40, been together for 3 months or 30 months. Many of the couples you see who have been married for over 40 years have known each other very little prior to marriage. P.S. Besides, they alredy are pregnant. Whether they will marry or not won't make it less of a huge change in both their lives! I am sure they're getting married because they're in love. Is it wise what they are doing? No. But "wise" refers to how much they already know each other and how ready they are for this move. When you talk about "odds" it's bad prognosis based on the fact that they can't know if they're right for each other at this point. Not knowing someone well doesn't mean they're bad. Don't play a psychic. They won't appreciate your doubts. No, I would never tell them what I just told you Thats why I posted it here. To get your opinions... Link to post Share on other sites
ShoeGirl Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Based on what you said their odds are not too great considering that they are young and haven't dated very long. They have added the stress of a new relationship with the stress of a new marriage and a new baby. If they are both mature and responsible then they have a better chance than most. I have seen marriages like this work out longer than people who dated for 7 years first. What they really need is support from their family and friends, not to say that you are not supporting them. If they are serious about making it work maybe suggest a marriage counselor... something similar to pre-martial counseling but at the beginning of their marriage, it could save them some future problems. Link to post Share on other sites
kaizer0007 Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I think it's wrong to get married just because someone is pregnant. You need to be in love, and feel right before marriage. They should date for at least some time, and consider living together before they decide on marriage. A marriage that won't work is far worse for the kid than not having the biological dad during the early years. Link to post Share on other sites
HeyYouGuys Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 About 50% of marriages fail. I think their odds of making it are 50-50 (maybe less, because they are so young and have the added stress of a new baby coming) But you never know. My friend's grandparents married after knowing each other three weeks. They had a baby during their first year of marriag. They went on to stay together 52 years! So some people defy the odds. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 What are the odds that a young couple only knowing eachother 3 months and getting pregnant and then married the next month , that it will all work out ? They are early 20's.... The chances aren't good at all. Just the fact that they have only known each other for a few months before getting married. It definitely takes more then a few months to really get to know someone. I also don't believe in marriage just because of pregnancy. Link to post Share on other sites
almostthere Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 I got married because i was pregnant. I was with the guy since i was 15 and got pregnant at 18 then married young because of that. We had another baby together and shortly after her birth (1 year) we divorced. Had i been older, wiser and had a grasp on the world none of that would have happened. My bf got married 8 months after dating his exwife. she threatened him with giving the baby her last name if they didnt marry. They went on to have 2 more kids and then she cheated on him and divorced him. I had a friend that had a one night stand with this guy. She turned up pregnant with his kid. they married shortly after she told him and have been crazy in love for 10 years. My sis and her husband got pregnant after about 8 months of dating and got married before my neice was born. They are married now for 12 years...not happily tho. This is my best advice...there isnt any way to know if it will or wont work out. What I would do is have the baby and give it the guys last name. child support reasons (i heard it was easier). Then continue your relationship and see where it goes. I wish everyone would have told me to do that. I wuld have never been though everything i was put through. divorce sucks no matter if you are in love or not. who gets this and i want that...trust me you dont want that. Link to post Share on other sites
typical Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I am going to go against the grain here, and say their chances of making it together are pretty damn good. Quite a few people mentioned that it was a bad idea because they dont know each other. That is precisely why it might work....Other people stated that it was such a short time span. Again, another reason why it might work. People who tend to live together (IMO) for long periods of time and then get married, and have kids have a greater risk of falling apart, because they are already used to the fighting, nagging, annoying idiosyncracies, habits and whatnot. Somehow, they expect all of these things are going to magically disappear when they get married, or when a new life enters the picture. The reality is that it often gets worse because then they feel like they dont have to try anymore. They already tried enough and accomplished what they set out to do. People that are thrown together by fate, circumstance or love that get married and are pregnant all within the span of 3 months or so, while it seems irresponsible, and haphazard, actually might have a better go of it then the rest. You see, they are not accustomed to each other, and they know this. It is still so new, all of it. They are willing to work harder to overcome the hard times because they know they have had the short time working against them. Because of this, it gives them more of a reason and incentive to push past the hard times and perservere. Link to post Share on other sites
prncssfce9 Posted September 22, 2006 Share Posted September 22, 2006 slim to none Link to post Share on other sites
rina_r Posted September 22, 2006 Share Posted September 22, 2006 What are the odds that a young couple only knowing eachother 3 months and getting pregnant and then married the next month , that it will all work out ? They are early 20's.... Didn't they hear about birthcontrol???? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted September 25, 2006 Author Share Posted September 25, 2006 Didn't they hear about birthcontrol???? In the heat of passion...perhaps not Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted September 25, 2006 Author Share Posted September 25, 2006 I am going to go against the grain here, and say their chances of making it together are pretty damn good. Quite a few people mentioned that it was a bad idea because they dont know each other. That is precisely why it might work....Other people stated that it was such a short time span. Again, another reason why it might work. People who tend to live together (IMO) for long periods of time and then get married, and have kids have a greater risk of falling apart, because they are already used to the fighting, nagging, annoying idiosyncracies, habits and whatnot. Somehow, they expect all of these things are going to magically disappear when they get married, or when a new life enters the picture. The reality is that it often gets worse because then they feel like they dont have to try anymore. They already tried enough and accomplished what they set out to do. People that are thrown together by fate, circumstance or love that get married and are pregnant all within the span of 3 months or so, while it seems irresponsible, and haphazard, actually might have a better go of it then the rest. You see, they are not accustomed to each other, and they know this. It is still so new, all of it. They are willing to work harder to overcome the hard times because they know they have had the short time working against them. Because of this, it gives them more of a reason and incentive to push past the hard times and perservere. When the lust and infatuation die down ( in a quick rush rush relationship ) all you are left with is the person they really are....and you may just not like them too much. Thats why you have a long engagement so you can see the intolerable and the tolerable. Link to post Share on other sites
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