Is he serious?

[yk_2006]

Me and my boyfriend of almost 1.5 years came to a state where he is telling me that he doesn't want to force it anymore. I've been telling him that since day one and he said that if we don't do anything we will not be together. We live in different states, he is still in school and I am holding a f/t desing position. Since day one, I've been telling him not to force me into the relationship, don't make me call you, don't make me love you. I am afraid I never felt it naturally, since day one HE was after me. I have a very strong feeling for him maybe love. I say I love him. He would not say "You were right about this and that", he just tells me he doesn't want to force it. I ask him, can you say that I am your girl, he says "I don't want to force it."

What is going on?

 

Now, he is back at school and maybe have been talking, thinking about where it is goin but that's not him. Has he met someone or he actually understands my point of view. The major problem is us being away and competition with this relationship. He is at school and he interacts with many people unlike me. I don't want to trust where he is. He gets pissed and mad when I don't trust him or say something "well you have options at school (to be with someone else). Am i obsessed and overprotective of him, is that love too...he says he stopped hanging out with his friends for me, so I can trust him and know he doesn't do anything without me. I am all for him to have friends girls/guys and I never had a problem, he has willingly on his own chose that and says that I don't have to worry about it because he doesn't hang out with anyone.

[norajane]

I don't understand your post - it's full of contradictions, like you love him but you never felt it naturally, and you ask him not to force you into a relationship, but you want him to say you're his girl, and you say you are ok with him having friends but you say you don't want to trust him.

 

I wouldn't be at all surprised if he's confused too.

 

What do you want? Do you want to be with him? If so, stand up and tell him that. Do you want him to enjoy his life and his friends? Then tell him that and trust his feelings for you.

 

If you really don't want to be 'forced' into a relationship, then by all means END this and stop giving him mixed signals and then getting mad when he doesn't know what to do with you.

[Da_1_n_OnlyN3na]

first of all to trust him you have to actuaally TRUST him....do not and i repeat DO NOT assume things that are not dont make stuff up in your head and think they are real...thats the biggest mistake i have ever done in my relationships....trust me...ugh! but neways i am confused also but i Think i know where your comming from....is it that you want to be with him but not be too serious about it? i dont know...but when you have doubts in love you should go with the doubts...dont say you love him when you say you think you love him...love is not a maybe thing....and you cant make him not hang out with his friends just because he is with you...he has to have his fun with his friends too not just with you.. sometimes guys need their time out with their boys to hang out and chill talk about music cars sports al those things guys talk about lol....just like girls like to go to the mall try on shoes and dresses and buy make up talk about their loved ones ..girly stuff...if you tell him not to force things in the relatioship then do the same thing and dont force things with him....

[yk_2006]

first of all to trust him you have to actuaally TRUST him....do not and i repeat DO NOT assume things that are not dont make stuff up in your head and think they are real...thats the biggest mistake i have ever done in my relationships....trust me...ugh! but neways i am confused also but i Think i know where your comming from....is it that you want to be with him but not be too serious about it? i dont know...but when you have doubts in love you should go with the doubts...dont say you love him when you say you think you love him...love is not a maybe thing....and you cant make him not hang out with his friends just because he is with you...he has to have his fun with his friends too not just with you.. sometimes guys need their time out with their boys to hang out and chill talk about music cars sports al those things guys talk about lol....just like girls like to go to the mall try on shoes and dresses and buy make up talk about their loved ones ..girly stuff...if you tell him not to force things in the relatioship then do the same thing and dont force things with him....

 

 

I've never forced this relationship and I've never asked him or had any concern for him to stop hanging out with his friends. He stopped and isolated himslef form hanging out so i do not have negative thoughts.

[yk_2006]

I don't understand your post - it's full of contradictions, like you love him but you never felt it naturally, and you ask him not to force you into a relationship, but you want him to say you're his girl, and you say you are ok with him having friends but you say you don't want to trust him.

 

I wouldn't be at all surprised if he's confused too.

 

What do you want? Do you want to be with him? If so, stand up and tell him that. Do you want him to enjoy his life and his friends? Then tell him that and trust his feelings for you.

 

If you really don't want to be 'forced' into a relationship, then by all means END this and stop giving him mixed signals and then getting mad when he doesn't know what to do with you.

 

 

 

Interesting, he's been busy at school on training. I left for the weekend and I've told him. Three days passed, he hasn't called me. I called him last night, his cell was off and he did not aswer his room phone. What am I suppose to think, afterall...he hasn't called me but he knows where I am and with who. I checked his profile this morning, he changed it up and included a song that pretty much says "i've had enough of this bull****" so how should I respond to that as well...