I need her

[Guest]

I just don't know what to do. My girlfriend and I have been together for five years. We have always considered eachother soulmates and thought that our love was more unique than any other. About a year ago we had a really rough week of fighting and she left me (she was planning on coming back but she wouldn't let me know that). After about a week of her being gone I (messed up) hooked up for the night with another girl. We ended up getting back together but she held that incident (as me cheating on her) over my head for the past year. I guess I probably didn't do enough to make her feel confident and have the trust she needed to be happy. I've pretty much been running from facing-up to everything and just (very naive) thought maybe time would heal her wounds. Now we have been very distant for a month and we've been fighting a lot. She's been begging me to "snap out of it" or "come back to her" but I just kept running. Now she has got fed up and has been gone for a week. We've lived together for three years. I'm 24 and she's 23. She still talks to me. She called me three time the first night sh left...she called to tell me what she was up to and then she called to tell me she loves me and good-night. Then she didn't call for a couple of days (she was staying at a friends house) but kept telling me to call her. She kept small talking me and wouldn't let me tell her how I feel. Finally I got it all out. She said we had a good talk but i'm not sure what that means. She called me on her own yesterday (the day after our big talk) just to say hi and tell me how her day was going, plus she told me to call her later. I called her that night but (it seems like night makes her a little different with her attitude towards me) she just small talked for about 20 minutes . She just acts like she's fine without me. She tells me everynight "good night" and have sweet dreams. She told me she would date anybody else and wouldn't forget about me. She says I am still her best friend. No I am trying to be happy on the phone with her (she won't see me) so I don't stress her out or make her want to stop talking. I don't understand. Why would she stay in contact? Why will she talk everyday (sometimes more than once) but not see me in person? She's been staying at her parents and won't come home. Is there any hope for us to get back together? She is my other half.

[Guest]

Hhhheeeeelllllpppppp, somebody please reply

I really need some advice on this!!! (Please reply if you have any advice) I just don't know what to do. My girlfriend and I have been together for five years. We have always considered eachother soulmates and thought that our love was more unique than any other. About a year ago we had a really rough week of fighting and she left me (she was planning on coming back but she wouldn't let me know that). After about a week of her being gone I (messed up) hooked up for the night with another girl. We ended up getting back together but she held that incident (as me cheating on her) over my head for the past year. I guess I probably didn't do enough to make her feel confident and have the trust she needed to be happy. I've pretty much been running from facing-up to everything and just (very naive) thought maybe time would heal her wounds. Now we have been very distant for a month and we've been fighting a lot. She's been begging me to "snap out of it" or "love her" but I just kept running. Now she has got fed up and has been gone for a week. We've lived together for three years. I'm 24 and she's 23. She still talks to me. She called me three time the first night she left...she called to tell me what she was up to and then she called to tell me she loved me and good-night. Then she didn't call for a couple of days (she was staying at a friends house) but kept telling me to call her (so I did). She kept small talking me and wouldn't let me tell her how I feel. Finally I got it all out (We had a 3 hour conversation and I told her everything...she doesn't believe that I could realize everything I did in just a week). She said we had a good talk but i'm not sure what that means. She called me on her own yesterday (the day after our big talk) just to say hi and tell me how her day was going, plus she told me to call her later. I called her that night but (it seems like night makes her a little different with her attitude towards me) she just small talked for about 20 minutes . She just acts like she's fine without me. She tells me everynight "good night" and have sweet dreams. She told me she wouldn't date anybody else and wouldn't forget about me. She says I am still her best friend. Now I am trying to sound happy on the phone with her (she won't see me) so I don't stress her out or make her want to stop talking. I don't understand. Why would she stay in contact? Why will she talk everyday (sometimes more than once) but not see me in person? She's been staying at her parents and won't come home. Is there any hope for us to get back together? She is my other half.

[Ukwizard]

Hi Guest, it would be grateful if you could write in paragraphs to help other Loveshackers to read your thread.

 

It gives us a poor eye sight, and a big head ache reading such a badly constructed piece of writing. In fact I ve given up!

[missdeathwish]

Ditto on the paragraph thing.

 

Have you tried apologizing and dedicating yourself to not messing up again? If I were her, I'd be in agony. A genuine apology is in order. Not promises, not begging. A genuine, honest apology. This consists not of "oh, sorry" or "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings" but an actual admission of guilt, the mistake, etc. You need to tell her you did something wrong and that you regret it, AND you need to show her that you won't do it again. Then you listen to her. Just a thought.