Lacey Posted January 29, 2002 Share Posted January 29, 2002 I feel absolutely lost. My boyfriend died in a car crash on new years eve and i cant get over it. i feel so depressed and lonely, i have no family apart from our three month old little girl Victoria. He was my world and all i want is for him to come home. Everytime my phone rings i think its him and i am having nightmares about the crash. I am thinking of giving Victoria up for adoption because she deserves 2 parents. Not a mum who can hardly even look after herself. i just want to curl up somewhere and die. Victoria is driving me mad and i just want to end it all. What can i do to stop feeling like this Link to post Share on other sites
o-o Posted January 29, 2002 Share Posted January 29, 2002 My heart goes out to you. I am so very sorry about your tragic loss. The best advice I can give you is not to make any decisions regarding your life and the life of your child while the wound is still so raw. Please, please give it some time. Give yourself time to heal at least a little bit. Death is never easy to deal with, especially unexpected death. I lost both my father and my brother as a result of a massive heart attack. There were no warning sings, and they both died instantly. They were ripped out of my life while I was totally unprepared. I promise you, it will get easier. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen nevertheless. Cherish your little girl -- a part of your boyfriend is alive within her, and that is something that will always be with you. If you need a friend, if you want to write to me - let me know and I will give you my email address. You are not alone... Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted January 29, 2002 Share Posted January 29, 2002 my heart also goes out to you, because losing someone is a very hard thing to work through, but unless you work through that grief, it's going to be doubly worse. But, there's hope. Many churches offer grief ministry or counseling at little or no cost. They sometimes even offer bereavement support groups, where people who have been or are going through the same thing as you gather together to help lessen their burden of pain by sharing it. Look in the phone book -- most cities have a ministerial alliance made of preachers and priests and rabbis and other local spiritual leaders who can point you to the church of your choice. Don't let grief cheat you out of a relationship with your child. Sometimes it's easy to forget that no matter how much pain we're in, there's someone dependent on you for love, for shelter, for food. Am not saying this to burden you, but to help you put things into perspective. If you have a close friend or family member to help you with your daughter, don't hesitate to ask. Most people don't know how to begin to help a person who's lost a loved one, so speaking up can only help. Good luck as you work your way though this grieving process, and remember, even if we aren't on very familiar terms with everyone who posts, I think the neatest thing about this community is that people truly do want to help others. Keep us posted, jo anne Link to post Share on other sites
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