heyduh Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 NLP is as a persuasion/influence style of communication. there are many workshops and seminars that teach NLP communication ... people like salesmen, leaders, politicians use these techniques all the time ... FYI, this probably works more on women than men because women are more right-brained/emotional and females are more "linguistic" than men .. this makes sense .. think about it ... all the master seducers of the past were "smooth talkers" excellent linguists .. ross jefferies of "speed seduction" (google it) is one of the first dating/seduction/pickup gurus .. and his tactics are all based on NLP ... his workshops and books are geared at getting laid ... but i think some of that can be taken a step further and used to seduce an ex .. or influence them back into a positive state and feeling about our relationship .. i wonder if anyone has tried this? it would be amazing to hear success stories and strategies. at a very high level it would involve (all this done via NLP communication patterns): 1. the elicitation of the ex's true values (core values deep down .. not fluffy stuff like i need a man who is honest .. duh, everyone says they do but what does that do for you??) .. if we are dealing with an ex or current gf, we should have a head start on this 2. being able to meet ex's core values or the perception that you meet the ex's core values ... this is manipulative. to be honest, if you don't meet each other's core values then you should not be in a relationship .. for the people involved in "speed seduction" this is ok, they just want to get the girl in bed by making her feel close/connected/intimate with the pickup artist ... but if you are trying this on an ex.. think about whether you do or can truly meet her core values ... btw, this is the hardest part if trying to win an EX back ... she left you because most likely you DID NOT meet her core values ... (that's why I asked above, this strategy needs a lot more thought if it is to work) 3. again, using NLP communication to change the emotional state of an ex .. we must lead communications so that they guide her state from comfort, closeness into fascination, adoration and ... horniness .. this can be done using patterns, stories, embedded commands etc ... 4. "anchoring" the "emotional states" in her .. so next time you want her to be aroused, or fascinated, or comfortable or (whatever state you want her to be in), you just execute the appropriate anchor to have her in that state immediately (versus long drawn romantic/emotional communications in #3 above) 5. using covert influence tactics on a day to day basis. this sounds bad, manipulative etc .. but the fact is we do this all the times! we ask our signifiant others to do things for us .. sometimes they will, sometimes they won't ... but the power lies in making them believe that they want to do *whatever* for us, or that the idea we are trying to push is really *thier idea*, not ours ... lol! ... think about all the times you've tried to argue, rationalize, "talk about" issues with your significant other .. i believe NLP gives you tools to make the influence more suggestive, and thereby more powerful .... example .. you tell me what works better: guy sitting in underwear watching tv in winter "hey! can you get me the blanket from the bedroom??" ... OR (looking at her sweetly in a particular way looking at her sweetly in a particular way (stimulating an anchor of "caring feelings" .. see above) and saying "i'm cold here.. why don't you come cuddle up with me??" there are a few more things .. i'm very much a newbie to NLP and don't have a clue (really) .. but I'd love to see if anyone has studied and successfully used this to "get back the ex" other points to consider : strategy to win back an ex who has started dating someone else (using NLP boyfriend destroyer patterns) strategy of reminding ex of all your good qualities and making your bad qualities seem insignificant .. major challenge .. you need to go back and somehow reinforce the positive anchors that you subconciously created over the past X number of years ... and even more difficult is negating the bad anchors that you subconsiously created over the years ... other obstacles to overcome .. an ex who just doesn't talk to you anymore .. NLP techniques supposedly market themselves with things like "get anyone to return your phone calls" ... interesting, huh? NLP isn't everything, but I think it could be a very useful tool to use in a situation like this ... Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 Neuro Linguistic Programming 3. again, using NLP communication to change the emotional state of an ex .. From what I know about NLP it is not used to change the emotional state of someone other than yourself. ... his workshops and books are geared at getting laid ... No, his workshops & books are geared to lining his pockets. Are you trying to sell something here? Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 Are you trying to sell something here? I also get that distinct impression. example .. you tell me what works better: guy sitting in underwear watching tv in winter "hey! can you get me the blanket from the bedroom??" ... OR (looking at her sweetly in a particular way looking at her sweetly in a particular way (stimulating an anchor of "caring feelings" .. see above) and saying "i'm cold here.. why don't you come cuddle up with me??" Neither. This just conjures up the picture of a goose-pimpled gimp sitting around in his underwear in the middle of winter. Neither cute nor masterful. I think I'd probably just go out for a walk in the snow and contemplate the state of my life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author heyduh Posted September 1, 2006 Author Share Posted September 1, 2006 Are you trying to sell something here? NO .. I'm looking for folks who may be serious about wanting to better the chances of getting an ex back. Link to post Share on other sites
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