Road Rage Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Very happy for you luvstarved that things are going better in the present moment. It does seem to suggest an emotional basis for the problem. Physiological problems can`t easily be overcome without medical assistance but the mind and emotions have an amazing ability to function when the will is centered. And I hope his mind is centered on you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author luvstarved Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 Very happy for you luvstarved that things are going better in the present moment. It does seem to suggest an emotional basis for the problem. Physiological problems can`t easily be overcome without medical assistance but the mind and emotions have an amazing ability to function when the will is centered. And I hope his mind is centered on you. Well I define success as mutual orgasm so that is pretty good. However, it was the same rather impersonal event in nature so I have real doubts that his mind was centered on me. It is almost like an alternate form of masturbation, really, but I did benefit so I'll take that for now. I am rationalizing at the moment that we are working on being able to "succeed" more often than fail as the immediate goal, and hope that I will be able to then take the next step (whatever that might be) that will bring us to a more intimate type of sex. I will be afraid of undoing the progress by giving him any excuse to think that I am "unsatisified" with his "performance". You have a good point about the psychological angle. I think if things don't continue to progress I will have to bring up the physiological part but he is having an increasingly easy time of it that way so your argument is good... Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 I don't know, I wouldn't put all my eggs in the psychological reasons basket. Many people mistake ED with impotence. ED is having problems achieving and maintaining erection in normal circumstances, not being completely unable to achieve erection or achieve orgasm. ED also varies by degrees. One man may have extreme ED, while another may be borderline. I do think his not masturbating is crucial, though. The build up of semen releases certain chemicals into the bloodstream that are integral to the erectile process. Once a man releases his semen he must remanufacture those chemicals from the beginning. If he is getting older and has structural changes that contribute to ED, as all men do to a certain degree as they get older, he needs all the internal stimulus he can get. I think having a bottle of a vasodilator like viagra wouldn't hurt either. If he's feeling any anxiety he can pop a pill and have some added support. There would be times he could probably use it, other times he wouldn't need it. The combination of more confidence and retraining his body to only respond to you I think would improve your marriage immensley. Link to post Share on other sites
Author luvstarved Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 ... retraining his body to only respond to you .... Holy Cow! You've just described my wildest fantasy! And I'm sure, a WHOLE LOT of other people's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You've got a good point, too. I am NOT putting my eggs in any one basket...there's a lot of time and circumstance to consider... Link to post Share on other sites
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