Sand&Water Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 I cut myself and drew blood on a piece of paper and left it on the windshield of his car. Just a paper with blood Ariadne Just a glimpse smell of his soul, would intoxicate me. Likewise. Intoxicate is an understatement. Link to post Share on other sites
CrushedOrgans Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Sometimes I wonder: If you truly love someone, is it more courageous and truthful to pursue and fight for them or to let go? Do only the ones whom are afraid let go? . . . hmm. i guess it depends. the last guy i dated did not try even ONCE to contact me after i broke up with him, but we knew a lot of the same acquaintances, so i know it took him a very long time to get over me. not that i'm so special, he was just that much of a loser. and i don't think he was making a point, because i don't think he had the presence of mind to do that on purpose. i knew i made the right decision, especially when he never tried to call, text, anything. he was probably too dumb to know what email was back then. and he was also a gigantic p*ssy of a "man." he didn't do anything wrong to me besides be a dull, annoying disappointment. he wasn't overly happy, or overly sad, or any extreme temperament. he just "was". he stared and grunted a lot. ugh, i'd rather be with a sure-thing cheater than with him again. at least if he'd tried to get me back i might have been impressed by him for the first time since i saw him actually heat up his own can of soup. but he did what he always did...nothing. and i was relieved not to hear from him, actually. sorry, that was quite a rant. Link to post Share on other sites
Jaded-Arie Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 For those of us coping with relationships of any kind: How far would you go to attain even just a little bit of comfort and peace? Would you seek the person out? Would you be honest? Would you be hurtful? Would you get drunk? Would you gamble? Would you go to psychics? What, what? How far would you go? Well, with my breakup, which was 2 months ago. I got drunk, had 2 one night stands . Was the only way to keep me from stalking my ex. After a month of NC, I decided to make contact, not to get him back, but just to touch base. We talked on and off, going through what went wrong etc. Two weeks ago, he sent me an mail, which was The ultimate Closure. It was bitter sweet, but it did leave me all fussy inside. I still feel all fussy just thinking about it . Now I am doing good, not getting drunk anymore, no ONS, and no men in general, and just continuing doing my own thing. This is my 'Getting Back To Jade'. Link to post Share on other sites
Jaded-Arie Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Hi, How far would you go to attain even just a little bit of comfort and peace? I drove a thousand miles to look at him for an hour with the binoculars. (He was sitting at his computer by the window, I could see him as if he were three feet away ) Ariadne :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :lmao: I feel you on this one sis. Had I had money for gas, would probably had done that too. But I got a moment of clarity, wine and the occasional tequila costs much less than guess to drive long distance Link to post Share on other sites
LaraV Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 If it were possible, I'd have him erased from my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Jaded-Arie Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 You, know--I wonder how much you are in love with the Denver guy, and how much you are in love with love and the idea of what it's supposed to be like. *Standing Ovation* I couldn't have said it better myself. Hence the latest instalment with FWB Guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Jaded-Arie Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Hi, If this was my scene, I would have left a drop of my blood. The blood that ran through my veins, when my love was strongest. I did that for some other guy. I cut myself and drew blood on a piece of paper and left it on the windshield of his car. Just a paper with blood Ariadne Ariadne, have you tried boiling bunnies, writing on his lawn with your blood, crash his house??? Someone please call the guys in white coats. I'm afraid, I am very afraid. Link to post Share on other sites
justagirliegirl Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 I probably did a few things like that in my youth but not now as it is too stalkerish and creepy and besides I have gotten over other guys I was "so in love with" I know I would be able to again. Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 If this was my scene, I would have left a drop of my blood. The blood that ran through my veins, when my love was strongest. I did that for some other guy. I cut myself and drew blood on a piece of paper and left it on the windshield of his car. People, this isn't love. This is 'imagine you're the heroine of a goth novel - obsession/infatuation' Love makes you good and big - not creepy and stalkerish. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 How far would one go.....how about vandalizing the new bf's car with paint thinner, gluing his home doorlocks twice, sending him threatening texts and emails, cranking him at all hours of the night on his home phone, and lastly showing up at his complex at all hours of the night and simply pacing outside his door. Guess what...........it all worked and my girl came back to me. Sucks for him though huh as from what I understand he is heartbroken over losing her . Link to post Share on other sites
In Sync Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 stalking is not a sign of love...it's a mental disease of the mind, based in narcissism. how far would I go for love?..I would leave that person alone if this is something they wanted. Because love is selfless. Link to post Share on other sites
TheSilentType Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 stalking is not a sign of love...it's a mental disease of the mind, based in narcissism. how far would I go for love?..I would leave that person alone if this is something they wanted. i give very few people my "voice of reason" award.... ....but you get one for this post. Let's face it....if they really cared about you then they would want to be with you....by just stalking a person, you're essentially licking the feet of someone who's just given you a nice kick to the curb. GET SOME DIGNITY....and some mental counseling Link to post Share on other sites
LaraV Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Let's face it....if they really cared about you then they would want to be with you....by just stalking a person, you're essentially licking the feet of someone who's just given you a nice kick to the curb. GET SOME DIGNITY....and some mental counseling Amen to that. Link to post Share on other sites
Tanice Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 I went through a period of denial, probably still going through it, i didnt drink, but started smoking which is probably worst. I fought so hard for my relationship, and i am still waiting in vain, i was totally happy and he acts like i ment nothing which is what i dont get, we were involved for over 3 years and he acts like i was just a fling. But what hurts them most he acts so heartless, my tears mean nothing, and i have basically given up on love all together. By the way this is going on 2 months and i still cant stop the tears(How pathetic am I?) you be the judge Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Hey, Ariadne, have you tried boiling bunnies, writing on his lawn with your blood, crash his house??? Nah, none of that. I'm not a violent person at all, I never get angry even. I'm just a hopeless romantic. That blood thing was a very long time ago, a guy that I dated for a whole year and I was totally broken hearted when it ended. So I left him that note. Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Mollyanna Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 how far have I gone? well I read my ex's emails and forwarded some messages between he and I to the new girl he was dating. We were talking about our sex life in them. (note: This is not the guy I am currently dealing with.) Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 I haven't done anything yet with B.... We are well over 2 months with NC...... I miss her so madly... I've gone on a bunch of dates lately and all...... but it's hopeless. I LOVE HER. And I'm too much of a chicken sh*t to admit it. I really don't know what to do anymore........ I just want to be with her..... and I'm trying to change that. I really AM in love with HER, and ONLY her. -tp Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_alchemyst Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 Because love is selfless. Oh, I disagree. Love is totally selfish. Link to post Share on other sites
Jaded-Arie Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Love is selfless but being dumped drives people senseless I mean I agree with you, but lets be honest here, very few people go through a breakup with (ALL) their sense and dignity intact. From tame stalking tendencies: Obsessive Ex Calling Disorder, the (dreaded cringeworthy) drunk dialling to the more absurd and straitjacket deserving blood scrolling, camping out of houses, boiling bunnies, etc. Love = Selfless. Love + Rejection = "Holy crap did I do that????" Its been two months since my breakup and I remember for a week, I obsessively drunk dialled my ex Pathetic ), stalked his blog (never posted anything), and emailed. He was kind enough to entertain me. But then I came back to my senses, put down the wine and just got on with it. After a while, we started talking again in a civil and saner fashion. We talked about everything, the good, the bad and the dowright ugly, then there was closer. I guess that is what I wanted all along, the closure and as I said, it was bitter sweet, but more sweet . Now I am fine and just doing my own thing. Link to post Share on other sites
In Sync Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Love is selfless. It means not thinking about your own needs but what the other person desires. No matter if their desires mean they don't want you. Maybe the ex is totally blind and made a mistake but hey, you know what that is their choice. Selfishness aka Narcissism brings out insecurity and immaturity. Because it's now all about satifying your needs. Selfish people can't accept rejection they- distort reality leading to stalking an harassment. Where is love in that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_alchemyst Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 I'm really glad to know you are doing far better now, Arie. You know, this is why I prefer to entertain feeling and emotion over logic; there is just so much more variety, you know? I think I understand what you mean, and I think that it makes sense. However, I still think love is selfish. Why? It is so commonly voiced to us that "love is selfless." But this "selfless love" would be unrelated to anything else pertaining relation to the lover, then, like their happiness, for example. But doesn't such a thing defy the very nature of love or of what it is supposed to be? When you say love is selfless, you might as well be saying that love is disinterested, which seems like a contradiction in itself because it's like saying you are indifferent to the thing you love and value, but how can you love something that you don't love or value? It doesn't coincide. And also, you often hear something like, "In order to love another, you must love yourself first." Well, while that is all well and good, doesn't that then mean you must literally love yourself before you can love anyone else? You are putting yourself first, as you should, but doesn't putting yourself first constitue selfishness? I remember I read it somewhere--just think of how you say you love someone: You say, "I love you." It's still you before them, isn't it? And isn't that selfishness? Link to post Share on other sites
In Sync Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 if one never puts anothers needs in front of their own...it is impossible to understand what selfless love is...ask a parent who works at an unfulling job not because the want to but because they love their kids and want to clthes feed and shelter them..that's selfless. It's not emotionless or dettached it's stepping outside of your ego and acting out of love. Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Romantic love is just infinite contradictions. C'mon. No one has ever really been able to fully describe love. But we know how good love feels when we have it, and how horrible it feels when we lose it. I think that's probably about the most we'll ever know. Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_alchemyst Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 Perhaps you're right. But it's that another type of love? Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 if one never puts anothers needs in front of their own...it is impossible to understand what selfless love is...ask a parent who works at an unfulling job not because the want to but because they love their kids and want to clthes feed and shelter them..that's selfless. It's not emotionless or dettached it's stepping outside of your ego and acting out of love. Parent/child love is VERY different from romantic/sexual love. Our language needs more words. Link to post Share on other sites
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