A Girl Posted February 3, 2002 Share Posted February 3, 2002 Hi everyone, Currently, I'm sorta a "friend" with a really great person. We know each for awhile, but haven't really hang out with each other that much, but as of late we're starting to a lot. In the beginning I was attracted to him, but now only sometimes am I attracted to him while other times I'm not. He's a very great guy. Has most of the qualities I look for in a guy (but we might have some different values), but I don't really know if I should forge ahead and date him or continue to be "friend" with him. He had expressed that he wanted to date me, but I've told him that I'm not really sure if I'm ready. I don't want to date him and then end up breaking up. I want to know for sure if I really like him and the relationship will last. We do things like couple do, but sometimes what we do also reminds me of my ex. I find myself doing things to him that I would do to my ex. It's really weird. My ex and I had been broken up for over a year....so I should be over him by now. Plus I was the one to break up the relationship...so I was just wondering why am I thinking about my ex when I'm with this person. By the way my ex and I still talk with each other, but we don't really hang out with each other. I haven't have the gut to tell him that I'm "friend" with this other guy. What's the next that I should take? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I just want to thank you ahead for any advice. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted February 3, 2002 Share Posted February 3, 2002 I think you should go ahead and date this guy...... if attraction's there, a friendship isnt really gonna work out... so - either date n see if it works, or simply lose him - cuz he will get away once he sees u dont like him the way he likes u ... just take it slow ... oh yeah, and u have no obligation to tell your ex anything... he's out of the picture thats my opinion! best of luck Hi everyone, Currently, I'm sorta a "friend" with a really great person. We know each for awhile, but haven't really hang out with each other that much, but as of late we're starting to a lot. In the beginning I was attracted to him, but now only sometimes am I attracted to him while other times I'm not. He's a very great guy. Has most of the qualities I look for in a guy (but we might have some different values), but I don't really know if I should forge ahead and date him or continue to be "friend" with him. He had expressed that he wanted to date me, but I've told him that I'm not really sure if I'm ready. I don't want to date him and then end up breaking up. I want to know for sure if I really like him and the relationship will last. We do things like couple do, but sometimes what we do also reminds me of my ex. I find myself doing things to him that I would do to my ex. It's really weird. My ex and I had been broken up for over a year....so I should be over him by now. Plus I was the one to break up the relationship...so I was just wondering why am I thinking about my ex when I'm with this person. By the way my ex and I still talk with each other, but we don't really hang out with each other. I haven't have the gut to tell him that I'm "friend" with this other guy. What's the next that I should take? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I just want to thank you ahead for any advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted February 4, 2002 Share Posted February 4, 2002 Dont' date him or anybody unless you're sure you're ready. And if you're looking for assurances that a relationship is going to last forever and there won't be an eventual break up, you're on the wrong planet...try Neptune...or Mercury if you can handle the heat. Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted February 4, 2002 Share Posted February 4, 2002 You dont want to end up in a full blown r/s if you have second thoughts. You may hurt this guy if you first agree to date him and than decide to back out later. You should spend less time with him. If you have been friends with this guy for a while now, whats the problem? Your attracted to him but whats stopping you. As long as the two of you spend time together, you will be leading him on. Giving him hope, giving him a fantasy. You have to be straight foward when talking to him. Tell him you are not ready to date now. That you need a friend not a r/s. As for your ex, why is he in the picture? Do you have kids with this person? Something keeps you two tied at the hip. Dont' date him or anybody unless you're sure you're ready. And if you're looking for assurances that a relationship is going to last forever and there won't be an eventual break up, you're on the wrong planet...try Neptune...or Mercury if you can handle the heat. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted February 4, 2002 Share Posted February 4, 2002 I kind of disagree: I dont see how dating the guy is necessarily same as a "full-blown r/s" ........ why not just try him? she's half-attracted to him... maybe something as simple as kissing him will help her decide if she likes him or not. as long as she lets the guy know it's just dating and no committment, she's not leading him on or hurting him... just my opinion. -yes You dont want to end up in a full blown r/s if you have second thoughts. You may hurt this guy if you first agree to date him and than decide to back out later. You should spend less time with him. If you have been friends with this guy for a while now, whats the problem? Your attracted to him but whats stopping you. As long as the two of you spend time together, you will be leading him on. Giving him hope, giving him a fantasy. You have to be straight foward when talking to him. Tell him you are not ready to date now. That you need a friend not a r/s. As for your ex, why is he in the picture? Do you have kids with this person? Something keeps you two tied at the hip. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts