quietintrovertgirl Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Can you believe i lose "Friends" to a message board.I leave this incel board because members verbal attack me so i leave the board.I thought the friendship i created would last offline but these "Friends " choose the incel board over me.Nobody has kept in contact with me. I just needed to vent because I'm so tired of not having loyal friends.I can not believe that incel board is more important then friendship.I reall y am in shock right now and i don't want to cry.I'm tired of being hurt by people. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 What is an incel board? Regardless, those people aren't true friends if they so easily abandon contact (I'm assuming you've tried contacting them and aren't just waiting for them to get in touch). Have you tried developing friendships offline? Link to post Share on other sites
TheSilentType Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Have you tried developing friendships offline? She's introverted...so I'm guessing she finds it easier to make friends online... Link to post Share on other sites
Author quietintrovertgirl Posted September 6, 2006 Author Share Posted September 6, 2006 incel board is involuntary celibate. You're right those people weren't real friend but you guys have to understand. I dont have any friends offline.All my friends are on these message board.IT's hard for me to create friendship offline so to hear my"Friends" posting on the incel board and not keeping in touch with me.It hurts.People verbal attack me on that board and nobody defended me. Why!!!!!!!!!!! can't i find reliable friends. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Well, if everybody on that board has no friends elsewhere either, it could be they preferred to keep their friendships on the board rather than ditch them for an email relationship with just one person. Not saying it's right or that was the only option, but it sounds like a high school clique pack mentality. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 I'm so sorry for you. I know just how you feel. I recently lost a dear friend, or what I thought was a good and dear friend too. It was an on-line friendship as well. NJ is right. Those friendships aren't really REAL. I believed it was as well. But the fact that they were so quick to drop you, should tell you that to THEM it wasn't really a friendship. Just learn from it and move on. Maybe you can make some more (fake) friendships on LS! Link to post Share on other sites
Author quietintrovertgirl Posted September 6, 2006 Author Share Posted September 6, 2006 I woudn't advice anybody to join the incel board. I feel that board is poison and cancerous because it's a bunch of people complaining about their problems and not willing to solve them. I got caught up in the sickness. I now realize i never had friends on that board.Everytime i yelled and scream about our friendship being in trouble. I got verbal attack and the moderator capt bandaid sided with everybody. Yup it's high school crap. The men would gain up and verbal attack me.The moderater didn't say anything to them. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Hey, I wouldn't worry too much about a mod named Captain Bandaid! Who cares what he thinks. Maybe you'll like it here better. Link to post Share on other sites
TheSilentType Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 NJ is right. Those friendships aren't really REAL. I believed it was as well. But the fact that they were so quick to drop you, should tell you that to THEM it wasn't really a friendship. Wise words... Maybe you can make some more (fake) friendships on LS! btw....i like your avatar touche Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Thanks, Silent! And OP, it will be ok. I know it hurts. It feels like you've lost a REAL friend. I'm going through it too but you'll get over it. Hang in there, ok? Link to post Share on other sites
SoCalCatman72 Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 It's called misery loves company, most people are on the incel board to gripe and complain and hope to find someone as miserable as they are (of the opposite sex hopefully, though it is the 21st century) to relieve them of their incel status, so I'm not suprised that they chose the board. The board is safe, there's more numbers working in their favor. Link to post Share on other sites
Author quietintrovertgirl Posted September 6, 2006 Author Share Posted September 6, 2006 Socalcatman, Thank you.Misery does love company and You're 100% right about the members on that board.Most of the incel board members didn't like posting on Love shack and other boards.Some of you guys were mean to them. I'm telling you guys that board is poison and the moderators are not fair and balance. I spoke the truth and Capt Bandaid the moderator would side with the people who verbal attack me. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 I think the friends you make online are real, but it takes time to cement, just like IRL. I know I've been more intimate emotionally with a lot of you guys than with the people I keep in touch with in the three dimensional world. It's a new kind of friendship, though, one where you don't know the faces and names of the friends your'e talking to with very little hope of actually ever meeting them in the flesh. The internet has changed the parameters of so many things, including friendship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author quietintrovertgirl Posted September 6, 2006 Author Share Posted September 6, 2006 Yes the internet has changed everybody lives for the good and BAD. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 I think the friends you make online are real, but it takes time to cement, just like IRL. I know I've been more intimate emotionally with a lot of you guys than with the people I keep in touch with in the three dimensional world. It's a new kind of friendship, though, one where you don't know the faces and names of the friends your'e talking to with very little hope of actually ever meeting them in the flesh. The internet has changed the parameters of so many things, including friendship. Yes, well said Burning. I'm still confused though as to whether these friendships are real or not. I think for some of us, especially those of us who would be considered introverts, they ARE more real. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 I think the friends you make online are real, but it takes time to cement, just like IRL. I know I've been more intimate emotionally with a lot of you guys than with the people I keep in touch with in the three dimensional world. It's a new kind of friendship, though, one where you don't know the faces and names of the friends your'e talking to with very little hope of actually ever meeting them in the flesh. The internet has changed the parameters of so many things, including friendship. Someone I know in RL confronted me and said that I prefer to be emotionally intimate with strangers on the internet because I fear real intimacy with real people because I was hurt by someone who I opened up to emotionally in the past. Food for thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 Someone I know in RL confronted me and said that I prefer to be emotionally intimate with strangers on the internet because I fear real intimacy with real people because I was hurt by someone who I opened up to emotionally in the past. Food for thought. So do you think you can't be hurt by people you open up to emotionally on the internet? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 So do you think you can't be hurt by people you open up to emotionally on the internet? No, you can be hurt by internet friends, but it doesn't have the same sting, for me at least. I lost a lot of RL friends when I was in my abusive relationship, because people got tired of seeing me put up with BS, and that hurt worse. For me at least, having online friends is slightly removed from having RL friends. The typing, and the distance, make it a bit easier to manage the friendships. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 But what if one of those friends (on line friends) just stopped talking to you with no reason given, like what happened with the OP, it wouldn't bother you? Say it was someone you were used to chatting with every day and then suddenly they disappeared with no explanation. The "sting" wouldn't be as sharp as it would have been in a RL friendship? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 But what if one of those friends (on line friends) just stopped talking to you with no reason given, like what happened with the OP, it wouldn't bother you? Say it was someone you were used to chatting with every day and then suddenly they disappeared with no explanation. The "sting" wouldn't be as sharp as it would have been in a RL friendship? It would, but not as much as if a friend IRL stopped talking to me out of the blue. I've had both of these things happen and the friends I lost IRL hurt the worst. Interestingly enough, though, those friends that I was very close to IRL, have reconnected with me over the years -- through the internet!! But those friends I had online, even very dear ones I had for years, and shared a lot with, I have not reconnected with. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted September 6, 2006 Share Posted September 6, 2006 How ironic. And thanks for your thoughts..very interesting. Link to post Share on other sites
Author quietintrovertgirl Posted September 7, 2006 Author Share Posted September 7, 2006 Blind_otter and touche, I agree with both post Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted September 7, 2006 Share Posted September 7, 2006 I only have three good friends IRL outside my family and like Otter these days I keep in touch with them mostly over the net Link to post Share on other sites
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