When is it a date?

[Almost]

So I'm having a hard time telling if when I ask a woman out, if it is a date or if it is just hanging out as friends.

 

I've asked several women out on what I think are dates, only to discover later that they didn't think they were on a date, just getting together as friends.

 

To me, if I ask a woman out to go do something, just the two of us, and neither of us is in a committed relationship, and I offer to pay and everything, that means we are on a date. Especially if I pick her up at her place and drop her off afterwards.

 

Do I have to be so blunt and obvious about it by saying something like, "ok, then this is a date, right?"

 

I'm thinking that if a woman is attracted to you and wants to think she is on a date, then she'll think she is on a date and act accordingly. If not, then she will think you are going out as friends and will act as such.

[DaNziNgQuEeN1]

I think it should be pretty obvious to a woman if a man is asking her out on a date. Of course it depends on the current relationship that you may have with a woman. If you two are friends and then you say you wanna hang out then you're hanging out. If you tell her that you like her as more than a friend and you want to take her out on a date...then I think she'd know it was a date. Maybe some of the women you've encountered were lying to you when they said they thought it was "just going out as friends."

[Jane Doe]

How are you ending your dates? With a "See ya later!" as you drive off or are you making romantic gestures? Are the women you're taking out women whom you've hung out with as buddies previously? Guys always get the rap of being clueless but sometimes women need to have things spelled out, too. It could be that perhaps you're giving off a "don't get too close" vibe that they're picking up on. Just a thought.......

[Yamaha]

When your tearing each others clothes off because the passion is so intense then she knows it's a date.

[monkey00]

Women dont like things to be 'labeled' or verbalized.

"is this a date?" "can i kiss you?" "can i hold your hands?"

Asking just reeks of insecurity becuase they interpret as a guy being unsure of himself, it gives them the upperhand because you're letting her decide whether the outing was a 'date' or not.

 

there's absolutely nothing wrong with asking, you can be successful depending on the type of woman she is.

 

Take action, talking is for girlfriends...action dates.

The easiest way to be successful is to (say it and) do it, dont question.

[Almost]

How are you ending your dates? With a "See ya later!" as you drive off or are you making romantic gestures?

 

I always give a hug, but hardly ever a kiss.

 

 

Are the women you're taking out women whom you've hung out with as buddies previously?

 

Most of the time they are friends of friends that I've met before and hung out with in groups, but don't really know well yet. Sometimes it's someone new I haven't met or known before.

 

Guys always get the rap of being clueless but sometimes women need to have things spelled out, too. It could be that perhaps you're giving off a "don't get too close" vibe that they're picking up on. Just a thought.......

 

That might be the case. I think sometimes I end up sending mixed messages because I perceive I'm getting mixed messages from the woman myself, and it becomes a self reinforcing cycle and self fulfilling prophecy.

 

I find it easier to flirt with and make romantic gestures towards women I haven't met before, as opposed to women I've known for a while through volleyball and other friends, where we have pretty much established a pre-existing friendship relationship.

[Jane Doe]

I find it easier to flirt with and make romantic gestures towards women I haven't met before, as opposed to women I've known for a while through volleyball and other friends, where we have pretty much established a pre-existing friendship relationship.

 

Then there's your answer! You need to step outside your comfort zone and meet complete strangers and see how your luck goes for you.