So close, but so far...The worries of love.

[superconfused]

Hey everyone. Well, I'm back for more help. This time it's not quite so serious (if you look at my other posts, you'll know what I mean). I finally gathered the courage to tell this girl that I like her. I have liked her for years, but it hasn't been until the past 2 years that we've become really close, and I couldn't bring myself to tell her until just a couple days ago. And the good news is that she said she liked me, too! I was so relieved. I have been very loyal to her over these years, and I'm confident she knew that I loved her long before I said anything about it. Every day, she has been all that I can think about. I'm so afraid of losing her- aside from being the girl of my dreams, she's also my very best friend.

But that is the problem- being afraid. I have changed from an optimist to a worrier over these 2 years. Now I worry about every little detail in our 'relationship'. We aren't dating steadily - meaning that she's not my girlfriend - because of our standards (and our church standards, as I explained in my last post). But every moment that I don't see her, I'm wishing that I was with her. It really hurts, actually.

Even when we are with each other in a public setting, like school, It can still hurt. She is the kind of girl who likes to talk to everyone in the group. That's a good thing; it's just that she doesn't really talk to me unless I start the conversation. And even then, she usually just has a really short statement or response, and then she is off with the group again. But when we are alone, she isn't like that. It's kind of confusing for me because I know she likes me, but I want to talk to her every single day, every chance I get. I know that I can't be with just her every day. But if we could just talk more, even in public places like school or church, I'd be so much happier.

What I need is advice on how to stop worrying/missing her, I guess. It takes a lot out of me. I've forgotten what it's like to truly enjoy life over the past couple years. I need to find a way to be content with just knowing that she likes me, and I need to stop depending on being able to see her and talk to her all of the time- it just can't always happen.

 

I really want this pain to go away... Any suggestions? Thanks in advance!