tony, is it always like this?

[yes]

I notice how guys to whom im not attracted like me much more easily... and the more they feel my dis-attraction, the harder they try.

 

Guys who sense attraction from me usually aren't as attracted in return.

 

Is there something about dis-attraction that rlly attracts people?? My main question is - Is it ever possible to feel attracted to someone and find out they're just as attracted to u?

 

Im talking physical here, because those guys i mentioned - i like them as people, i just dont like 'em physically...

 

so how should i act w/ guys i do like physically?? show a lil attraction n stop? show no attraction? then they might think i dont even like 'em at all?

 

advice? i'm lost cuz guys act unexpectedly for me ... so far

[Tony T]

I'm sorry I can't address your final question. You just have to play that by ear. It works out fine in the end for most people.

 

Yes, it is absolutely possible to be mutually attracted and it happens millions of times a day. If you don't think it's happened to you, you probably aren't paying attention or you just aren't catching on. This is an instinctual thing. If you're missing the cues, you better start paying attention. When you're attracted to a guy, don't go bonkers but don't act disinterested either. Just watch out for signals he may send and respond to them...just don't over-respond. Seeming desperate will turn a guy off instantly.

 

As far as you being attractive to those you aren't attracted to, many people like what they can't have. The more a person acts like they are unattainable, the more many people will go after them. Actually, you aren't acting unattainable...you just aren't attracted or interested but they just don't get that right off. That's the challenge men love and they will turn up the power almost every time. With some men, you have to call the police before they will stop pursuing because some men just don't get hints.

 

A lot of this has to do with rejection. Many men would rather have their penis cut off than face rejection. Most people are just way too stupid to sit and think about their feelings. If we just considered that getting rejected is not bad at all, very temporary, no pain, etc., it wouldn't be a big deal. But most men have whopping egos and just can't understand why a woman wouldn't be attracted to them and want them in their lives forever.

 

So they keep after you even after you've sent signals you're not interested because they think you must simply not understand that they are the right guy for you and they're going to show you that even if it lands them in jail.

 

Absolutely, the best way to entice any guy you like is to act a little aloof but not so much that he will back off. Myself personally, if a gal doesn't seem interested it takes me about a half a second to be on down the block. But I have learned this over time. And usually when I do this the gal who didn't seem interested will be at the end of the block first...ready to suck up to me.

 

Hell, I don't know how this works or why, it just does. And it's a game that if you play well, you can get anybody you want.

 

I keep the attitude that any woman who gets to know me will fall in love with me, and, believe it or not most either end up in love or being my friend...even if they weren't interested in me or attracted to me at first. I have learned to be a challenge, to act harmless, not to stick my tongue out and act like a sex-starved dog when I meet women, to concentrate my conversations and questions on them and not me, not to compliment them much if at all at first, etc.

 

The greatest thing I ever learned is that, unless a man is as ugly as an ape, any woman can fall in love with him if all other things, like personality, education, common interests, etc., are in order. In the end, women truly fall in love with a guy as they get to know him...not off of initial physical attraction. A lot of great looking guys are certified buttholes.

 

So if I'm really cool and act like I just want a nice conversation and don't get into any boy-girl type subjects, the female gets to know me better...and will slowly become attracted to me...the right way.

 

There is NOTHING in the world that turns on a woman more than for a guy to try to learn more about her life and her and keep attention away from himself. I mean THEY LLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEE IT...especially because most guys they encounter start spouting off mostly about themselves like they were trying to sell them something. But men are mostly idiots and don't learn this. They want to go in for the kill instantly. That's why Men are from Mars and Women..etc. Women love men to be interested in them as people. (Of course, late at night when they've had lots to drink, they don't care much one way or the other. But that's not going to get any kind of relationship stated either.)

 

Be a challenge but not too much of one and learn to take clues and hints from the guys who you are attracted to who may be interested and you've got it made. And the first time you meet them, cut things short and get their phone number...let them know you've got other things to do. And then wait three or four days to call them.

 

Never, ever chase a guy...and keep up the challenge thing for a long time. That keeps their interest. Men are primarily hunters...from way back in time...and once they've hit the target and scored, they put their trophy on the mantel and their back out to score again. It's your job if you're interested to see they don't go out for another hunt.

 

You'll learn how to do this one day...and every guy in town will be after you. We'll handle that problem for you when it happens.

[yes]

=) thanks tony.

 

i think i get the drift of things...

 

btw, u say women LOVE to have attention on them and their lives... is ther anything men LOVE just as much?

I'm sorry I can't address your final question. You just have to play that by ear. It works out fine in the end for most people. Yes, it is absolutely possible to be mutually attracted and it happens millions of times a day. If you don't think it's happened to you, you probably aren't paying attention or you just aren't catching on. This is an instinctual thing. If you're missing the cues, you better start paying attention. When you're attracted to a guy, don't go bonkers but don't act disinterested either. Just watch out for signals he may send and respond to them...just don't over-respond. Seeming desperate will turn a guy off instantly. As far as you being attractive to those you aren't attracted to, many people like what they can't have. The more a person acts like they are unattainable, the more many people will go after them. Actually, you aren't acting unattainable...you just aren't attracted or interested but they just don't get that right off. That's the challenge men love and they will turn up the power almost every time. With some men, you have to call the police before they will stop pursuing because some men just don't get hints. A lot of this has to do with rejection. Many men would rather have their penis cut off than face rejection. Most people are just way too stupid to sit and think about their feelings. If we just considered that getting rejected is not bad at all, very temporary, no pain, etc., it wouldn't be a big deal. But most men have whopping egos and just can't understand why a woman wouldn't be attracted to them and want them in their lives forever. So they keep after you even after you've sent signals you're not interested because they think you must simply not understand that they are the right guy for you and they're going to show you that even if it lands them in jail. Absolutely, the best way to entice any guy you like is to act a little aloof but not so much that he will back off. Myself personally, if a gal doesn't seem interested it takes me about a half a second to be on down the block. But I have learned this over time. And usually when I do this the gal who didn't seem interested will be at the end of the block first...ready to suck up to me. Hell, I don't know how this works or why, it just does. And it's a game that if you play well, you can get anybody you want. I keep the attitude that any woman who gets to know me will fall in love with me, and, believe it or not most either end up in love or being my friend...even if they weren't interested in me or attracted to me at first. I have learned to be a challenge, to act harmless, not to stick my tongue out and act like a sex-starved dog when I meet women, to concentrate my conversations and questions on them and not me, not to compliment them much if at all at first, etc. The greatest thing I ever learned is that, unless a man is as ugly as an ape, any woman can fall in love with him if all other things, like personality, education, common interests, etc., are in order. In the end, women truly fall in love with a guy as they get to know him...not off of initial physical attraction. A lot of great looking guys are certified buttholes. So if I'm really cool and act like I just want a nice conversation and don't get into any boy-girl type subjects, the female gets to know me better...and will slowly become attracted to me...the right way. There is NOTHING in the world that turns on a woman more than for a guy to try to learn more about her life and her and keep attention away from himself. I mean THEY LLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEE IT...especially because most guys they encounter start spouting off mostly about themselves like they were trying to sell them something. But men are mostly idiots and don't learn this. They want to go in for the kill instantly. That's why Men are from Mars and Women..etc. Women love men to be interested in them as people. (Of course, late at night when they've had lots to drink, they don't care much one way or the other. But that's not going to get any kind of relationship stated either.) Be a challenge but not too much of one and learn to take clues and hints from the guys who you are attracted to who may be interested and you've got it made. And the first time you meet them, cut things short and get their phone number...let them know you've got other things to do. And then wait three or four days to call them. Never, ever chase a guy...and keep up the challenge thing for a long time. That keeps their interest. Men are primarily hunters...from way back in time...and once they've hit the target and scored, they put their trophy on the mantel and their back out to score again. It's your job if you're interested to see they don't go out for another hunt. You'll learn how to do this one day...and every guy in town will be after you. We'll handle that problem for you when it happens.

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "is ther anything men LOVE just as much?"

 

Most men really love to have a lady pay attention to them and be interested, if they happen to be interested in the lady. Don't forget, lots of guys have egos that need to be fed somehow.

 

Now me, if a lady cooks a nice meal for me...I am hers for life, or at least until I get hungry again.