TR19 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 My wife and I have been married 8 years with two kids. Ages 6yrs and 10 months. I found out two weeks ago that she was having an affair. The affair supposedly lasted 2 months and is now over according to her and his best friend. When I found out about the affair, she said she wanted OUT and that she should've gotten out 3 months after the marriage began. She says there was never any intamcy with us and she married for all the wrong reasons. We got married straight out of treatment. (we are both recovering addicts) She has stated that she has an issue with letting anyone close to her and she "hurts people". It's what she does. Two previous times in the marriage she has "seeked" out another person. Both times she was trying to contact her ex-boyfriends, seeing what she might have missed out on. And both times my gut caught her in the process. This time she actually went through with having an affair. She has an apartment and plans on moving on Friday. we have a schedule for the kids and are planning on spending one night a week together to wake up with the kids. My problem is this! We can't afford this!!! Her parents paid for the first 3 months of rent for her, but we are just getting more in debt. We had to up our home equity to help pay for a plumbing leak and she wants to use part of that to live. I keep thinking of the kids and the finances and all she thinks about is herself and what she needs to do for her. She says this will be good for us and she does want to go to marriage counseling on occassion and she wants to seek counseling on her own. I have already started seeing counseling for myself. I want to work this out with her. I can work on forgiving the affair. What hurts the most is watching her walk away and her saying that she can't work on this while living in the house. I don't know what to believe anymore. She says we aren't going to date people while this is going on, but who knows. What can she be thinking???? Thanks for any input. Link to post Share on other sites
Sup Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 She's wanting to keep messing around on you, contact an attorney, find out what your rights are. Go for sole custody, and the house. Link to post Share on other sites
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