Don't Know What To Think...

[Confused708]

I've been dating a girl for exactly a year now. Our relationship started off really well. We would go out, have fun with others, no jealousy, no fighting. Well after about the first 4 or 5 months things started to change. First I noticed, she started snooping through my emails, checking the phone when she got home from work and wanted to know my every move, even calling me from work to make sure I'm home or what I was doing. From my past, I have a lot of female friends from town as well as out of town, really close friends that weren't anything more than a friendship for as long as can remember. Anyway, we would go out in public, and one of these female friends would just as much say "Hello", and she would literally freak out. Or if someone would phone the house, just to see how I'm doing and how things are working out with my life, she'd up and leave the house angry. I don't know how I can get her to realize that no other woman catches my eye, nor do I want to break away from her, when things are going good, they go extremely well between us. Now I feel like I'm set aside from the others, I don't go out to see my friends in my spare time, I feel sheltered. What if we go out and someone says "Hi", why should I have to live afraid that a female I've known all my life as friends is just going to say "Hi" and start a big fight between her and I. On the other hand, she has come from some abusive relationships where her boyfriends were never around, and now she has one that stays in with her and given up his old social scene. I admit, I used to drink alot on weekends, and now I'm away from that, I did it for her and mostly myself. So basically, I have a hard time going for a couple with the guys, or even going over to there houses without being interrogated when I get home. But she feels it's okay if she goes out and has a couple with friends from work, but when I do it, it's a big deal. I have no clue on why she is this insecure, I'm not an angry person, I'm a very easy going guy who rarely gets angry at all. I just don't know what to do about her insecurity and anger problems. Now here's the second half of my story, this involves the internet. When I met her she was very close with this man who lived a quite a ways from us, who she intended on going to see, but she met me. Well after a couple of months and her telling me she had no communication with this man anymore, I come home and she had left her messenger on and he was writing to her. So I read it, and seen that she had wrote something like this, "I love you, you'll always have a place in my heart". So I confronted her on it, and she then used the excuse of her meaning it only in a friendly way. Than I took action, and installed a keylogger on the computer, and seen that it wasn't just one man, but others as well. She wasn't saying anything to the others like what she had said to the first man, but from the conversation, she implies to them that she is single. Than, I come across a website she's on, where she is getting all of these email addresses from. After that, I find out, not to sound racist or anything, I am of ethnic origin myself, that she has an obsession for black men. So again I confront her, and she knows she's guilty, and I get her to remove herself from those websites and we have talks about what she's doing and that it has to stop. So things go well for a couple months, we were getting very serious into the relationship, talking about a family and marriage. So I get curious again, and run the keylogger a couple more times two weeks ago, only to realize she is still doing this. For the past week she has been on vacation with some of our family, and I've had time to really look into these sites she's on, one of which she had signed up on while on vacation, with her reason on the website being that she's in a relationship, but looking for a date with a black man. This is driving me nuts, I don't know how to confront her again this time or really what to do. To sum it up, she's over insecure about me, but on the other hand she seems to be looking for something else, and just keeping me around until that certain someone else pops up, does that sound right? I really care for her, and know what kind of good person she can be. Just hurts to know all of this is going on behind my back, and I can't stop it, other than to confront and fight about it. Early next week we are going on a trip, for our one year, and I don't know how I'm going to be able to handle things knowing what's going on behind my back. If she really did love me, she'd have more respect for me than to do this behind my back and making it feel like I'm now leading a fake relationship. Any advice would help, and I know this sounds messed up, but I have no one else really to go for advice.