stevensgirl Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 Well, I was supposed to be getting married in less than a month. I've just realized tonight that my whole relationship is a disaster. I'm a little bit more than tipsy right now, I think getting a little drunk may have opened my eyes. I've been in a relationship for nearly a year, fighting off the ex-wife's crappy bull****, begging my boyfriend/ fiance for sex and getting it once a week if I'm lucky, desperately needing some attention from him and never getting more than the minimum. Funny, I asked about an engagement without a ring, this ass is looking at suv's for me to buy him with my settlement from my divorce but can't be bothered to buy a simple ring like evvery other normal man in the world. I'm stuck in this hell hole trying to figure out how to get out of it without spending every nickle I've got to get him out of debt. I haven't ever gotten so much as a boquet of flowers or a romantic card out of this jerk. I've lost every bit of self esteem I had, starting to put on weight cause I am so miserable.. I wish I'd jsut dissappear.......... Link to post Share on other sites
Adunaphel Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 This is not a sudden realization, is it? I'm sorry that you are so unhappy in this relationship, but at least it's a very lucky thing that you opened your eyes before you actually married. ...you still can call off the wedding. Even if you were just in a drunk seeing-everything-in-a-negative-way moment, there are some issues that should be clearly resolved before you get married. (Marrying someone after a year is also never very advisable, IMO.) I guess you'll have to do some serious thinking about your relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 So why are you even thinking about marrying this guy?! After getting out of one bad marriage, the last thing you should be signing up for is another one where sex, affection, romance, self-esteem and money issues are a problem already. Give it some more thought and call off the wedding if you're miserable! Link to post Share on other sites
BenThereDunThat Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 I had lots of red flags before I walked down the aisle and did it anyway. DO NOT DO IT!! Our stories are fairly similar. If you think money problems are bad now, just wait! I am now in credit card debt that I agreed to take on as part of the settlment - just so I don't ever have to speak to him again! He worked sporadically, got worse after we got married. He worked his butt off to buy a boat of course. Everything we couldn't pay cash for went on MY credit card. When I first went to see my lawyer and he saw the amount he said "I don't usually tell people this, but you need to get out NOW before he financially ruins you." I would take calling off the wedding at the last minute rather than going through a divorce 7 months after getting married! Link to post Share on other sites
penkitten Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 you could call off the wedding now or wait until the day before and just tell him and his family not to show up because its off. then you could go on to the wedding and tell your guests you are sorry that it was called off but lets all go down to the reception and eat and drink and be merry. you could then dance the night away and have a blast. then line all the single men up in a row and toss your flowers and whom ever catches it can go with you on your honeymoon "as a friend" or something. Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 Well, I was supposed to be getting married in less than a month. I've just realized tonight that my whole relationship is a disaster. I'm a little bit more than tipsy right now, I think getting a little drunk may have opened my eyes. I've been in a relationship for nearly a year, fighting off the ex-wife's crappy bull****, begging my boyfriend/ fiance for sex and getting it once a week if I'm lucky, desperately needing some attention from him and never getting more than the minimum. Funny, I asked about an engagement without a ring, this ass is looking at suv's for me to buy him with my settlement from my divorce but can't be bothered to buy a simple ring like evvery other normal man in the world. I'm stuck in this hell hole trying to figure out how to get out of it without spending every nickle I've got to get him out of debt. I haven't ever gotten so much as a boquet of flowers or a romantic card out of this jerk. I've lost every bit of self esteem I had, starting to put on weight cause I am so miserable.. I wish I'd jsut dissappear.......... Funny, I gave my EX everything you were wanting in your relationship and I got **itcanned. Link to post Share on other sites
Mirage222 Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 Your not STUCK in hell, you can leave and I think maybe you should .... crazy to stay.... your "relationship" is well, not a normal one. Link to post Share on other sites
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