I PEED on his Leather Couch!!!

[Donna]

I am so embarrassed about this whole situation and I don't know what to do. I am 19 years old and I have an internship at a prominent radio station. I am an assistant to the evening DJ (Ryan) and I have the biggest infatuation with him. He is young (for a DJ) 20 and I think that we have a lot in common. He is somewhat of a jerk and I think that's why I am attracted. Anyway, my point is, I think he's a critical person. So my story is extremely important when you think about the fact that Ryan is critical. Last night, after Ryan was done on the radio I went to his house for the first time and we started drinking. Anyway, I was having an ok time and then we started kissing. Which was great! But then we started fooling around. All of the sudden my pants were off. I wanted to stop and I knew he was thinking something was wrong so we did.

 

So I we laid on the couch and fell asleep. Well, when I woke up my clothes were wet and Ryan was not lying with me, he was sleeping in a chair. Turns out that I had urinated all over Ryan and he got up and changed and I urinated all over his leather couch in my sleep!

 

I felt so stupid when I woke up. I apologized but I think I just made an ass of myself. I knew that he just wanted me to leave. I felt SO stupid. I want to know what I should do to make myself feel better about this and what he's probably thinking. What should I do????

 

I have to intern with him tomorrow and I don't know how to act. I wish that he would like me but now I'm scared. I know that he's totally turned off because of this whole situation.

 

I would greatly appreciate your advice.

 

Thank you,

 

Donna

[Totally Confused]

Hey you know what? You're human. Everyone has had an embarrassing thing happen to them on at least one date. Right now, it's not funny, but down the road, you'll laugh hysterically when you tell a friend about it. Hey everyone pees, even him. If he's shallow, it will turn him off and you don't want him anyway, if he's a really cool guy, he will laugh it off. Don't be embarrassed, I think it's funny. Read the story below, maybe it will help you feel better. Post another letter after you see him again and let us know what happens.

Subject: FW: THE MOST EMBARRASSING FIRST DATE

THIS WAS ON THE LENO SHOW (9-7-99).

 

JAY WENT INTO THE AUDIENCE TO FIND THE MOST EMBARRASSING FIRST DATE THAT A WOMAN EVER

 

HAD. THE WINNER TOLD ABOUT HER FIRST DATE EXPERIENCE. SHE SAID IT WAS SNOWING AND COLD AND THE GUY TOOK HER SKIING. IT WAS A DAY

 

TRIP (NO OVERNIGHT). THEY WERE STRANGERS, AND TRULY HAD NEVER MET BEFORE.

 

THE DATE WENT OK UNTIL THEY WERE COMING BACK THAT AFTERNOON. THEY WERE

 

GOING ALONG IN THE CAR AND SHE HAD TO PEE REAL BAD, BUT IT WAS STILL ABOUT AN

 

HOUR OR MORE BACK TO CIVILIZATION. HE SAID SHE SHOULD TRY TO HOLD IT, AND SHE DID

 

FOR A WHILE. IT FINALLY CAME TO THE POINT WHERE SHE TOLD HIM THAT HE COULD EITHER STOP AND LET HER PEE BESIDE THE ROAD, OR IN

 

THE FRONT SEAT OF HIS CAR. THEY STOPPED AND SHE WENT OUT BESIDE THE CAR AND PULLED HER PANTS DOWN AND STARTED. WELL, SHE DIDN'T HAVE REAL GOOD BALANCE, SO SHE LET HER BUTT REST AGAINST THE REAR FENDER TO STEADY HERSELF. HE WAS A REAL GENTLEMAN AND

 

LOOKED THE OTHER WAY. WHEN SHE WAS FINISHED, SHE QUICKLY NOTICED THAT HER WARM BUTT HAD STUCK TO THE FENDER. THOUGHTS OF TONGUES FROZEN TO PUMP HANDLE NIGHTMARES

 

IMMEDIATELY CAME TO MIND AND SHE SOON REALIZED THAT SHE HAD A REAL PROBLEM. SHE WAS THINKING OF EVERY WAY SHE COULD TO GET RELEASED FROM HIS FENDER. HE WAS GETTING A BIT CONCERNED TOO, AND FINALLY CRIED OUT TO HER ASKING IF SHE WAS OK. WELL, WITH A RED FACE, SHE SAID SHE WAS FREEZING HER BUTT OFF!

 

SHE FINALLY HAD TO ASK FOR ASSISTANCE. NOW THIS ISN'T THE WORST OF THE STORY, THERE'S MORE TO COME. SHE TOOK OFF HER SWEATER AND COVERED HERSELF AS WELL AS SHE COULD AND ASKED HIM TO COME AROUND TO SEE IF HE COULD HELP. AFTER THE LAUGHTER SUBSIDED,THEY ASSESSED THE SITUATION. THEY HAD A REAL PROBLEM. THEY AGREED THAT THEY NEEDED SOMETHING WARM TO MELT HER BUTT OFF OF THE FENDER. THINKING ABOUT THE PEE THAT SHE JUST SPRINKLED ON THE GROUND MADE HER THINK THAT PEE IS ABOUT

 

THE ONLY THING THAT THEY HAD THAT COULD GET HER FREE.

 

WELL, AFTER EXPLORING EVERY OTHER POSSIBLE

 

SOLUTION, SHE LOOKED THE OTHER WAY, AND SO DID HE, AND PROCEEDED TO UNZIP HIS PANTS AND PEE HER BUTT OFF THE FENDER. THE REST OF THE TRIP HOME THERE WASN'T MUCH CONVERSATION.

 

TRUE STORY.