ellandroader Posted September 23, 2006 Share Posted September 23, 2006 Does anyone ever feel like they are on a losing run? I just seem to have this losing mentality right now, and it is hindering my social life big-time. Let me add a bit more...in a nutshell I moved to the US from England in 2004. I had acquired a job at Epcot, beating off a lot of competition at home to land one of the positions. At this time, I was on top of the world, looking forward to starting my new life abroad and brimming with confidence. Then roll on a few months...I am diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder. I get treatment for it twice a week. Having panic attacks, feeling withdrawn from everything and everyone I struggle to get involved. I finish my year then end up emigrating here permanently with my immediate family. Roll on another 2 years, still fighting off feelings of insecurity, the various symptons of SAD and an innate lack of confidence. I seem to screw up every social aspect of my life and cruel things keep happening. For example, I have been taken advantage of as captain on my last two soccer teams, and also led astray by women or left for someone better. Friendships fizzle out quickly as I dont think I have enough to say or in common. It is difficult as if no-one understands me. (I guess my background is way different to most people I meet) I have been here for 2.5 years and whereas it has its obvious benefits (I consider myself very lucky), it feels like my spirit is being crushed. I am a shadow of the guy I was before I left home and whereas I can put up a tough front, deep down it hurts. The thing is, I don't want to leave and just give up (it is an option) but I can't stand spending my nights in on my own anymore or waiting for calls that will never come. I sort of miss having those close friends around and especially wish I could find a girlfriend. In these instances, I just seem to get involved with the wrong people and due to my "nice" nature, I come off a lot worse. I get told I am a "great guy" by close friends and the like but I feel like I don't know what to do. It's frustrating because I know I'm capable of being much more, if given the chance. Can anyone else relate to this? Sorry, it's a bit disjointed but it is late here and I am somewhat tired. Cheers Dan Link to post Share on other sites
superconductor Posted September 23, 2006 Share Posted September 23, 2006 I glanced at your post very quickly, and for a moment I thought you had got a job as an Escort... Anyway, what you're feeling is perfectly normal and natural. Reason being that many - not all - American girls have this whole entitlement thing going on, whereas girls from the UK or Europe tend not to have it to such a degree, at least in my experience. And, naturally, because you were raised in a place that had more of a sense of history and of itself, that's missing in the US and it's hard to get used to. Does this make any sense? I'm a bit blotto right now.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ellandroader Posted September 23, 2006 Author Share Posted September 23, 2006 I glanced at your post very quickly, and for a moment I thought you had got a job as an Escort... :laugh: That made me chuckle...thanks. I'm told it (confidence problem) is normal, it still sucks though. I really want things to work and I am being hindered by factors of which some aren't even of my fault. The disorder set me back big time. It does make sense though what you said...thanks for the response. Link to post Share on other sites
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