living with a large person

[Pink Amulet]

I don't know the situation at all. But, do you think she could sense you were repulsed by her and the pain forced her to leave?

[kitesurfer]

that's very possible i guess. i never complained or mentioned her weight though. last november, i noticed whe was not wearing her wedding rings and her response was that she had gained too much weight. i replied that maybe it was time to draw the line. wrong thing to say i guess ,becuse she never attempted to wear the rings again. and gained more weight i guess. i don't know about all large people, but it seems that obeisity may be related to self esteem. she was overweight when i met her but i 'thought' she had a beautiful soul. found out later, she was just a politician. her soul act was --just an 'act'.

[mental_traveller]

OK, nobody really answered the f-ing question that OP posted: would you date someone who is very fat? I think a good comment would include if you're overweight.

 

"Curvy" is what... like Merilyn Monroe? Jennifer Lopez? Or 260 lbs? I'd really like to hear some honest answers about this...

 

Yes I would, *if* I found her sexy. And I have met or seen one or two women who were sexy even at that weight. Not many, but a few.

 

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it? Girls, would you be jealous?

[Almost]

Yes I would, *if* I found her sexy. And I have met or seen one or two women who were sexy even at that weight. Not many, but a few.

 

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it? Girls, would you be jealous?

 

 

I had a girlfriend who kind of looked like that, but she wasn't quite that overweight. After I broke up with her, I vowed that my next girlfriend would be thin. I'm still waiting for my next girlfriend.

 

But I didn't break up with her because of her weight - it was because we just weren't getting along well anymore. Even though she was overweight, she was still fairly active and healthy, at least about as much as I am.

I would date someone a little overwieght but not obese.

[Pink Amulet]

Yes I would, *if* I found her sexy. And I have met or seen one or two women who were sexy even at that weight. Not many, but a few.

 

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it? Girls, would you be jealous?

 

I will answer both of those questions (girls can hit it too) but *shakes head* Not my cup of tea.

[blind_otter]

Yes I would, *if* I found her sexy. And I have met or seen one or two women who were sexy even at that weight. Not many, but a few.

 

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it? Girls, would you be jealous?

 

Nope, not attractive to me. Sorry. I like shapely shoulders, and collar bones. For some reason I think that the nape of the neck is just so alluring.

[hotgurl]

Nope, not attractive to me. Sorry. I like shapely shoulders, and collar bones. For some reason I think that the nape of the neck is just so alluring.

 

I love the nape of the neck too.

 

As for the op I think once someone gets so big it limits thier abilities to enjoy certain activitiesthan no. Also there are the many medical problems that go along with obesity.

[SmoochieFace]

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it?

 

Absolutely. She reminds me of my GF... whew!

[Pink Amulet]

Yes.

 

You should never reject the ones you love over medical problems (I know that one first hand) but so much of obesity is self inflicted.

 

Sure there are their genes, and underlying psychological problems in some cases, but mostly they just like pizza and Mcdonalds and have never run a step in their life.

 

I work hard for my body, and as I am certainly not "skinny" genetically I have the potential to stack on the pounds if I become lazy.

 

Which won't happen as my active lifestyle is my source of happiness.

[hopeto]

well first of all I am woman:cool: and I will tel you that if you are going out and you are imature and shallow!!!!! then you may look for the GQ man. if you are a shallow man and imature you may go out and look for a pin up. but to tell you the truth if you are a loving person and not vain you are not looking for the looks you are looking for the conversation and if they can hold one or not.

[Toni_no12002]

Everyone has different opinions.You could walk out in the st tommorow and see a lass or lad thats abit overweight but you can find them attractive even though you say you prefer slimmer people.Its the whole package really.

 

Thing is why is there never a thread saying 'would you ever date a really skinny person?' because to me someone whos far too skinny puts me off just as much as a person who is too fat.

[PuppyDogEyes]

Example: http://data1.blog.de/blog/a/annikabryn/img/dawn_french.jpg

 

Guys, would you hit it? Girls, would you be jealous?

 

Actually, I find her rather attractive. I noticed her face and her eyes before I did her weight. But even at that weight, I don't think she's bad-looking at all.

 

I think it's really all in how much confidence one has in themselves. I've seen people who are larger than the woman in your example that simply exude self-confidence, and don't give a rat's ass what anyone thinks. To me, that's sexy.

 

I'm overweight, but I'm exercising and slowly getting rid of it - either way, though, I'm learning to be happy with myself as a person, so, to each their own.

 

For someone that's been overweight all of their life, I've never lacked for male attention, interestingly.

 

- pde.

[CrushedOrgans]

Yes.

 

 

I work hard for my body, and as I am certainly not "skinny" genetically I have the potential to stack on the pounds if I become lazy.

 

Which won't happen as my active lifestyle is my source of happiness.

 

 

and that is simply great for you, honestly. but you do have to realize that if you are this way, you are not in the majority. that means you get a pat on the back, but you don't get to expect everyone to have to be this way or to be divorced. it doesn't work that way.

 

maybe the people who don't work out have some other amazing quality that someone who does work out doesn't have.

 

the point is you love someone because of and in spite of their strengths and weaknesses, and if you aren't capable of that, than don't get married and don't kid anyone that you'll love them 'no matter what'.

 

anyone who gets married and doesn't think of these future changes in people should have thought it through a little better.

[CrushedOrgans]

Everyone has different opinions.You could walk out in the st tommorow and see a lass or lad thats abit overweight but you can find them attractive even though you say you prefer slimmer people.Its the whole package really.

 

Thing is why is there never a thread saying 'would you ever date a really skinny person?' because to me someone whos far too skinny puts me off just as much as a person who is too fat.

 

 

most guys aren't huge on skinny either.

 

in my experiences, good, bad or neither, men like real women who are attractive--something striking about them, something different. they won't shy away from big boobs or nice legs, of course, but they can do without them if she has other things he's interested in and attracted to. they don't necessarily want anna nicole at her heaviest or nicole richie at her thinnest. when it comes to 'skinny', they'll take it or leave it.

 

i don't think anyone really asks "would you ever date a really skinny person" because the general consensus is that females should be as thin as possible, and that that is what all guys want. that's not true, though, by any means. but no one asks the question because it feels like asking "why is the sky blue"?

 

i don't know what i am considered...i haven't seen my body type up here yet!

[Pink Amulet]

and that is simply great for you, honestly. but you do have to realize that if you are this way, you are not in the majority. that means you get a pat on the back, but you don't get to expect everyone to have to be this way or to be divorced. it doesn't work that way.

 

 

Please don't misinterpret me.

 

To clarify I never said such a thing.

 

In fact I said you should never reject someone based on medical grounds.

 

Aside from the relationship factors, I am speaking about how weight affects individuals, not relationships...

 

So I did comment that most cases of obesity are self inflicted.

 

It isn't as difficult as people think to change their body, mind and soul.

 

The rewards reeped would be worth it to (how about an extra 20 years on your life?)

[Toni_no12002]

 

The rewards reeped would be worth it to (how about an extra 20 years on your life?)

 

Still though people die even if they have been really healthy from alsorts of things like cancer so its not always true.I knew someone that was really healthy and exercised but still they died at 22????

[Pink Amulet]

Well of course, there are so many things out there that can kill you... why look unattractive, and increase your chances of type 2 diabetes, heart disease, heart attack, among many other things, and more and more studies are showing an increased risk of ALL forms of cancer.

 

All of this for a cheeseburger.

 

I say, just get off your ass and go for a run.

 

I read a story the other day about a morbidly obese woman who couldn't move... she went from 390 something pounds, to 170 pounds... you know how she started?

 

By clapping her hands.

[SmoochieFace]

Well of course, there are so many things out there that can kill you... why look unattractive, and increase your chances of type 2 diabetes, heart disease, heart attack, among many other things, and more and more studies are showing an increased risk of ALL forms of cancer.

 

All of this for a cheeseburger.

 

I say, just get off your ass and go for a run.

 

I read a story the other day about a morbidly obese woman who couldn't move... she went from 390 something pounds, to 170 pounds... you know how she started?

 

By clapping her hands.

 

Now I hope you do know that it takes much more than just 'getting off one's ass and going for a run'. That is a very simplistic solution, don't you think?

 

You seem to be very passionate about this issue. Were you obese at one time?

[Almost]

For some people it really is hard to lose weight and stay thin because they have a very "efficient" metabolism, meaning they don't burn as much calories as other people, even if they are similarly active.

 

When I was in my 20's, I could eat anything and I would never gain weight. I couldn't understand how anyone could ever get fat, unless they just did absolutely nothing and chowed down all the time.

 

Then when I hit my 30's, my metabolism changed and slowed down. Now all of a sudden I could easily put on weight if I didn't stay super active and watch what I eat.

 

Now I have to make sure I do both, stay active and eat healthy and with smaller portions, if I want to lose or maintain my weight. If I'm active and eat healthy, but eat big portions, I'll still gain weight.

 

So it's not as easy as it was when I was a young spring chicken. As you get older your metabolism slows down and becomes more efficient. And also just genetically, some people have naturally higher metabolisms than others. It has a lot to do with your thyroid gland.

 

Still I don't think any of this is a justification for being obese. It's still really unhealthy and if you are obese or significantly overwieght, you really have to try hard to get in shape.

[SmoochieFace]

It has a lot to do with your thyroid gland.

 

Indeed. And 'getting off your ass for a run' won't 'cure' hypothyroidism.

[CrushedOrgans]

Please don't misinterpret me.

 

To clarify I never said such a thing.

 

In fact I said you should never reject someone based on medical grounds.

 

Aside from the relationship factors, I am speaking about how weight affects individuals, not relationships...

 

So I did comment that most cases of obesity are self inflicted.

 

It isn't as difficult as people think to change their body, mind and soul.

 

The rewards reeped would be worth it to (how about an extra 20 years on your life?)

 

i didn't say anything about medical. and what i said can be applied to individuals or relationships.

 

and no offense, but just because you think it's easy doesn't mean everyone else feels that way. if it was so easy, it wouldn't be so hard. and there are many circumstances involved, as we all know.

 

i don't have a weight issue, so the only way i know anything is from other people. and i have seen people try and struggle and do everything, and it doesn't work. yeah it does take effort, but it is even harder to do something when you feel like you're beating your head off a brick wall. if it were so easy, we wouldn't have the problem we have.

 

it's easy for you because you have the mindset. that's half the battle. just as i am sure there is something you don't have the mindset for that someone else could say "but it's so easy! and look at the benefits!" unless you feel that way yourself, it doesn't help much.

 

i'm a 4.0 student, and i think it's easy. try telling someone who really tries and doesn't get a 4.0 that it's easier than they think. it's not. they are aware of the benefits of good grades, but that doesn't mean they can just make it happen, and it doesn't mean they're not trying.

[stoopid_guy]

i'm a 4.0 student, and i think it's easy. try telling someone who really tries and doesn't get a 4.0 that it's easier than they think. it's not. they are aware of the benefits of good grades, but that doesn't mean they can just make it happen, and it doesn't mean they're not trying.

Great analogy!

 

People must also recognize that others may have different priorities. Personally, I do want to feel good, I do want to have decent stamina, and I do want to be strong. To those ends, I exercise and eat reasonable well most of the time. A doctor would also tell me I need to loose 30-40 lbs, and I probably could, except I do want to have that dougnut once in a while, I do want to have that slice of pizza occaisionally, and I don't want to spend any more time than I do exercising.

 

And I don't care whether or not I impress someone who thinks I should loose weight.

[Almost]

Indeed. And 'getting off your ass for a run' won't 'cure' hypothyroidism.

 

It won't cure it, but it won't hurt it either. And hypothyroidism is also not an excuse to not get off your ass and go for a run. It just means you have to work harder. It's not an excuse for being obese.

[blind_otter]

It won't cure it, but it won't hurt it either. And hypothyroidism is also not an excuse to not get off your ass and go for a run. It just means you have to work harder. It's not an excuse for being obese.

 

word. I agree.

[pseudofemme]

Weight issues are complex. I have a friend who used to be anorexic and became overweight when she recovered... not because she started eating junk and got lazy, but because her metabolism is so messed up. She gains weight now if she eats more than 1000 calories a day. And she eats healthy and works out religiously.

 

Obesity itself often has psychological roots, which makes it MUCH harder to overcome than just by heading off to the gym. Many people use their weight as a "cushion" against the real world, even to subconsciously make themselves less attractive (especially in cases where people were sexually abused in the past). Some people turn to starvation, self-harm, compulsive exercise, etc. as coping mechanisms... others turn to food. Obesity can be a symptom of deeper issues. I think it's a shame this is often overlooked, because no amount of dieting or exercising will really help if the underlying problems aren't addressed.