His flirtin' ways...

[luvtoto]

My "he made me love him" guy is back.

 

The last time I talked with him we argued. I called him a "toxic-flirt". I posted about it.

 

It's been a year since, and he IM'd my 14 yr old daughter a couple weeks ago asking her questions about me. Like, "Is your mom still mad at me? What's she been up to?"

 

I ignored the attention...until last night. I emailed him a very short email.

 

He replied stating that the last time I talked to him I was pretty pissed.

 

I replied, "Well, I am not mad anymore."

 

He then, told me that he didn't ever want our friendship to end on bad terms. He then stated that we (me and my kids) mean the world to him.

 

Why does this man want to be in my life so bad? AND why would I mean that much to him??

 

I want to be friends with him. Yet, I am afraid I will get pulled in by his flirting ways again.

[luvtoto]

DAMN! It feels good to be back in my comfort-zone again. Haha!

[bluechocolate]

It's been a year since, and he IM'd my 14 yr old daughter a couple weeks ago asking her questions about me. Like, "Is your mom still mad at me? What's she been up to?"

And you didn't freak out about that? I think that is WAY out of line. Not only that, it is very immature. He can't phone or email you himself?

 

I want to be friends with him. Yet, I am afraid I will get pulled in by his flirting ways again.

 

I haven't read your other post(s) but from what little you've written here I would say stay away from him. Oh, and block him from your daughters IM, mobile, etc.

[typical]

A tad creepy:

It's been a year since, and he IM'd my 14 yr old daughter a couple weeks ago asking her questions about me. Like, "Is your mom still mad at me? What's she been up to?"

 

Quite passive agressive. And extremely see-thru.

 

 

Why does this man want to be in my life so bad? AND why would I mean that much to him??

 

I see no evidence of him wanting to be in your life "so bad" other than him contacting your daughter after a year long dry spell. If that is all he has to do to make you think that way about him after all that has come to pass, well, then, he has it easy.

 

I want to be friends with him. Yet, I am afraid I will get pulled in by his flirting ways again

 

Oh, and you will be sucked in, so if that is not within your comfort zone, steer clear, because YOU WILL be pulled in by his flirting ways AGAIN.

[luvtoto]

If that is all he has to do to make you think that way about him after all that has come to pass, well, then, he has it easy.

Maybe you misunderstood me. After a year long dry-spell, *he* brought up the fact that my kids and I still mean the world to him. Now...how is that possible? It's been a friggin' year of no contact.

 

That, Typical, is the reason I started to think he wants me in his life 'so bad'.

 

Also, no it doesn't weird me out that he IM'd my daughter. They used to be really good friends. Is that really so odd?

[bluechocolate]

Also, no it doesn't weird me out that he IM'd my daughter. They used to be really good friends. Is that really so odd?

 

Given what you just wrote above, yes, that is odd. He's been out of your lives for a year & then contacts a 14 year old girl to quiz her about the emotional state of her mother? Odd indeed. Quite frankly I'm surprised that you don't see that.

[alphamale]

Why does this man want to be in my life so bad?

because the woman he was dating for the last year has split.

[luvtoto]

Also, no it doesn't weird me out that he IM'd my daughter. They used to be really good friends. Is that really so odd?

 

Given what you just wrote above, yes, that is odd. He's been out of your lives for a year & then contacts a 14 year old girl to quiz her about the emotional state of her mother? Odd indeed. Quite frankly I'm surprised that you don't see that.

Well, I can see your point, bluechocolate. Thanks for your concern. My daughter and him used to be really close. She used to see him as a father figure for about a year. When my daughter was sick in the hospital, he showed up to see her, that same day.

[luvtoto]

because the woman he was dating for the last year has split.

The voice of reason.

[bluechocolate]

Well, I can see your point, bluechocolate. Thanks for your concern. My daughter and him used to be really close. She used to see him as a father figure for about a year. When my daughter was sick in the hospital, he showed up to see her, that same day.

 

And then he's gone for a year. And then he just 'pops' in one day via IM to ask about mom. And then he's probably gone again. Nope, not good. What do you think your daughter is learning from this?

 

At best it is a childish & immature thing to do. At worst it is duplicitous & sneaky, using your daughter to better his chances at a reconciliation. Was she glad to hear from him? Did she say she'd like to see him around again?

[luvtoto]

And then he's gone for a year. And then he just 'pops' in one day via IM to ask about mom. And then he's probably gone again. Nope, not good.

Oh! I get what you are saying. I thought you meant he was like a pedaphile (sp?) or something.

 

What do you think your daughter is learning from this?

I never thought about that. He was just getting divorced when I originally met him. He wasn't ready for any kind of relationship at that time. But, we stayed friends...but he just kept flirting with me and telling me things that *just* friends don't say.

 

At best it is a childish & immature thing to do. At worst it is duplicitous & sneaky, using your daughter to better his chances at a reconciliation. Was she glad to hear from him? Did she say she'd like to see him around again?

Yes, she was glad to hear from him. He did ask about how her life was going. She talked about her new cat and her knee surgery. They talked for about fifteen minutes (with me lookin' over her shoulder). He just asked about me in the beginning of their conversation.

[typical]

because the woman he was dating for the last year has split.

 

Yes, I was thinking somewhere along the lines of this. No joke.