Define Alcoholic

[Touche]

I went on the wagon and have not had any alcohol for 18 days. For about the year and a half before I was drinking 2 to 3 beers per day on average. One day I may have had one and the next day 3 or 4. It varied. But I usually did not drink to get hammerd, just to relax. Was I considered an alcoholic?

 

About two and a half wks ago I just lost the desire for any booze at all. I don't know what happened.

 

That's funny about the trying to "drink to relax" thing. You can usually be relaxed after two. But why do we, more often than not, drink PAST the point where we're already relaxed? Why? Because we're addicted. Our brains tell us that we need it to feel normal and good.

 

No one can really answer whether you're an alcoholic or not but yourself and your doctor. We can only speculate. Did you read those AA questions? Did you say yes to 4 or more?

 

What made you go "on the wagon." Was it really only because you lost desire or is it more than that? Had you been thinking that you wanted to stay away from it all together?

 

Also, how many times did you just say you would drink enough to relax but didn't stop there? Did you mostly wind up drunk or mostly not?

 

These are all questions to ask yourself.

 

For me the OP's problem is very obvious. If she's drinking 4 times a week and getting drunk EACH time, there's very little doubt that she's an alcoholic.

 

Can't really say with you. There's not enough information there for me personally to form an opinion on that.

[a4a]

That's funny about the trying to "drink to relax" thing. You can usually be relaxed after two. But why do we, more often than not, drink PAST the point where we're already relaxed? Why? Because we're addicted. Our brains tell us that we need it to feel normal and good.

 

No one can really answer whether you're an alcoholic or not but yourself and your doctor. We can only speculate. Did you read those AA questions? Did you say yes to 4 or more?

 

What made you go "on the wagon." Was it really only because you lost desire or is it more than that? Had you been thinking that you wanted to stay away from it all together?

 

Also, how many times did you just say you would drink enough to relax but didn't stop there? Did you mostly wind up drunk or mostly not?

 

These are all questions to ask yourself.

 

For me the OP's problem is very obvious. If she's drinking 4 times a week and getting drunk EACH time, there's very little doubt that she's an alcoholic.

 

Can't really say with you. There's not enough information there for me personally to form an opinion on that.

 

 

combo that with the blunts........

[Touche]

I haven't read through the whole thread, so if any of this has already been said, you know why.

 

IMHO, an alcoholic is someone who:

 

-Drinks just to get drunk and pass out

-Is incapable of having a few drinks with friends just for the sake of socializing

-Even after receiving a DUI, OWI, OWIL, or jail time, still continues to drink

-Can't say no to an alcoholic drink when presented to them

 

Just want to say that I agree with you EXCEPT for your second one and the last one.

 

Those two are not indicative of anything really. Some alcoholics CAN say no at certain times, as I've pointed out.

 

And your second point is just kind of too vague. An alcoholic can talk themselves into anything. They can drink their heads off and still say they were only drinking "socially."

[a4a]

I haven't read through the whole thread, so if any of this has already been said, you know why.

 

IMHO, an alcoholic is someone who:

 

-Drinks just to get drunk and pass out

-Is incapable of having a few drinks with friends just for the sake of socializing

-Even after receiving a DUI, OWI, OWIL, or jail time, still continues to drink

-Can't say no to an alcoholic drink when presented to them

 

Hey they tried to pop me for a DUI/ or whatever the hell it is called here on St. Patricks day..... obviously I got off...... but that does not mean that you are an alcholic just because you drank and got busted by a cop driving...... that means you should not drink and drive. I was actually tipsy not drunk and not even really tipsy they were waiting for people to pull them over outside the bar. They pulled me over because I was not wearing a seat belt... :rolleyes: ...but guessing if they made me blow in the doo hicky...... I may have been considered drunk? I got to do all the nose touchy thingys tho....... :lmao:

[Touche]

Yep, A4A that's true. I agree. So Rid, that's another one of yours shot down!

[Touche]

combo that with the blunts........

 

I know, really. You gotta be in REAL denial to not think you have a problem when you're getting drunk and smoking pot four times a week.

 

And OP, sorry I kept saying b/f when it's your husband who is bringing up his concerns. They are very legitimate. He's not just trying to be mean to you, you know.

 

Why don't you see if you can not drink for ONE WEEK and see what happens?

 

Do you think you can do it? Do you want to try?

[Pyro]

Hey they tried to pop me for a DUI/ or whatever the hell it is called here on St. Patricks day..... obviously I got off...... but that does not mean that you are an alcholic just because you drank and got busted by a cop driving...... that means you should not drink and drive. I was actually tipsy not drunk and not even really tipsy they were waiting for people to pull them over outside the bar. They pulled me over because I was not wearing a seat belt... :rolleyes: ...but guessing if they made me blow in the doo hicky...... I may have been considered drunk? I got to do all the nose touchy thingys tho....... :lmao:

 

I just mean that if you had a close call, then maybe that is a sign to be more careful so that next time you won't get into trouble. If you don't even attempt to try and be more careful and continue to drink and drive, then maybe that is a sign of alcoholism.

[IhavenoFREAKINclue]

Why don't you see if you can not drink for ONE WEEK and see what happens?

 

Do you think you can do it? Do you want to try?

 

I have...and can do it again...That's what I'm trying to say I don't NEED it. But is what I'm doing on my way there?

 

combo that with the blunts........

OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNOOOOOOOOO NOT POT!!!!!!!

 

Just kill me now!

[Art_Critic]

And Pot is not bad..I can smoke 17 blunts a week.....andbe fine....

LEGALIZE IT!!!!!!!

 

Spoken like a true addict...

 

How about no alcohol for 3 months ?? that is 90 days.. can you do that ?

[IhavenoFREAKINclue]

Spoken like a true addict...

 

How about no alcohol for 3 months ?? that is 90 days.. can you do that ?

 

 

See..that's just not nice...I'm not an idiot or a burnt out.

See...3 months....I can go without doing it during the week but I work hard all week and I wanna go out friday nights and have a martini...its that so bad?

 

And its not an addict who speaks like that...its you conservatives who think addicts speak like that. Its spoken from someone who thinks it'll do no harm if done. Just like liquor..I mean yes..it gets you in effed up situations....but Why is alcohol legal...I think its worse...i can operate heavy machinery while high and function totally normally....not if I'm drunk..so why not legalize it?

 

Freedom of speach is only ok as long as everyone agrees....

[Touche]

Were you high when you wrote that?

 

What's with the "you conversatives" thing? Sheesh...

[Yamaha]

People who get mad when they were the one's who asked for advice are in denial of their problem. You are beginning to realize you may have a problem but you don't want to believe it. If your H thinks you may have a problem and these people on LS, who don't know you or have any reason to lie to you, think you may have a problem then maybe you might just open up your defenses a bit and consider you might. just might have a problem. there is no shame in admitting you might have a problem. Just watch out for it and you may be able to overcome it before it overcomes you.

[Guest]

Freakin

 

Look at what's going on. You asked - first of all as a hypothetical (because you wanted to pretend it wasn't you) about what constitutes an alcoholic.

 

Now you see that the description fits.

 

What do you do? Deny. Find excuses. Start blaming 'conservatives'.

 

The very fact that you are making up all these excuses means you're an addict.

 

I am NEVER bored. That you consider every possible thing in life 'boring' EXCEPT drugs or booze is a VERY BAD SIGN. Those of us who don't need booze don't think all of life is dull unless booze or drugs is involved.

 

Right there's your sign. Girl, you're in trouble. And while you think you're fine, alcohol does lots more damage to women's bodies than to men's because women metabolize it differently.

 

And if your husband is mentioning it, then that means it is a problem.

 

Come up with whatever excuses you like, but you 'love' pot and booze - those are the words of an addict. You actually said 'kill me now' when someone suggested you go without for three months. Well I am mad about chocolate, but the thought of going without would not leave me stressed out to that extent.

 

Excuses, denial, calling people who suggest you might have a problem names - you know in your heart of hearts it's trouble but you really hate the idea that you are not in control. Sadly, you are not.

 

I only hope you get mad enough at the fact that these stupid things control you to decide they're not worth your love.

[blind_otter]

its you conservatives who think addicts speak like that.

 

Wellll. I'm not really conservative. But I am a recovering alcoholic.

 

And hey, I agree with you about pot. I think, just IME, that pot is pretty similar to alcohol. But there's a lot more drunk *******s than stoned *******s.

 

And no, having a martini on friday isn't bad. But if you can't stop after just one, or you plan your week around alcohol, or you find yourself fantasizing about alcohol...then maybe you should stop and think about why and when you drink. That's all.

[alphamale]

But I am a recovering alcoholic.

I've never met a 26 yr old who's "recovering" from so many things. Wow!

[blind_otter]

i'll be 27 next week.

[Art_Critic]

See..that's just not nice...I'm not an idiot or a burnt out.

See...3 months....I can go without doing it during the week but I work hard all week and I wanna go out friday nights and have a martini...its that so bad?

 

And its not an addict who speaks like that...its you conservatives who think addicts speak like that. Its spoken from someone who thinks it'll do no harm if done. Just like liquor..I mean yes..it gets you in effed up situations....but Why is alcohol legal...I think its worse...i can operate heavy machinery while high and function totally normally....not if I'm drunk..so why not legalize it?

 

Freedom of speach is only ok as long as everyone agrees....

 

And now we are the one with the problem.. transferring the issue and making us the problem isn't the answer and doesn't help you at all.

 

You are the one with the Alcohol problem..

 

I am a Sober Alcoholic with my addiction under control.. day by day my life clicks along without mind numbing substances in my blood..

I'm sober... 20 years in this coming June

 

Try 90 days without ANY alcohol

 

Come on and try .. I'm not asking you do 90 days and 90 meetings like I had to do to get sober.. Just 90 days

 

Edit..

 

I wanted to add that although I don't drink I understand that people can and do drink socially.. I have only had 1 GF that didn't drink alcohol and all the others including my exwife have been drinkers of alcohol.

Just because I don't drink doesn't mean that other people can't.. drinking just isn't for me..

 

I just wanted to add that so you would see that I'm not against drinking for you .. only for me..

 

Whether or not you drink is entirely up to you.. and only you

[Paysh]

I drank for years just on the weekends, getting hammered with my buddies, Friday & Saturday. Got a wicked job working for myself making big dough, bumped that up to 4 times a week, one of which was a solo mission to get drunk. Carried on for a year. Oh yeah, a DUI at age 18! That was sooooo much fun to deal with.

 

Work got tough, money evaporated, I began drinking on the weekends as usual, with an additional two to three weekdays by myself, occasionally with my stbxw.

 

Fast-forward two years and I'm now in the process of divorce (I threw the body shots with my alcohol abuse, she threw the K.O with an affair) and I'm just now 3 months sober. Feeling better than I have in years, but I've lost so much.

 

I dunno if I would have ever classified as an "alcoholic", but I sure as f--k have (had) a problem. It sure took me a massive blow to realize it.

 

Heavy drinking runs in my family. The only advice I can give is to realize the warning signs as they come up, because it's an easy run down a ****ty slope to a horrible wake-up.

 

Warning signs I ignored:

 

1) Blacking out 70% of the time I drank

 

2) Morning drinks! Always a good idea for a caesar on a Sunday morn, but beers on Wednesday morning, not so good.

 

3) Treating my wife with disrespect I would never even imagine doing sober.....eventually my wakeup call.

 

4) My bank account with regards to money spent at various liquor stores.

 

5) Hanging out with people who bore the piss out of me since I'm sober and not getting pissed up with them. I should've noticed the douchebaggery in them earlier, but most people rock when you're drunk.

 

Now I've forgotten what I was on about............must be the missing brain cells.

[Craig]

Just wanted to say that there are different types of alcoholics, for example:

 

1. Drink in the evenings to get drunk and pass out. This type is quite able at appearing not to drink and even be a health nut as they might never drink in public, etc.

2. Maintenance alcoholic, drink all the time but never get drunk.

3. Start drinking in the morning to get a light buzz and by supper time be quite impaired, go to sleep at a normal time but not pass out.

4. Etc.

 

The important point is that if alcohol is part of your life for any reason other than light social use it is a problem. Having a problem with alcohol does not mean that you are an alcoholic (yet) but it is a good indication that problems are coming your way.

 

Regular use alcohol to self medicate and handle specific challenges like boredom is a warning sign of worse things to come.

[a4a]

I have...and can do it again...That's what I'm trying to say I don't NEED it. But is what I'm doing on my way there?

 

 

OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNOOOOOOOOO NOT POT!!!!!!!

 

Just kill me now!

 

Hey I am not anti pot..... I am just not pro pot on a daily basis or even a weekly basis.

 

I would love to have a joint in the house right now that I could smoke when the timing was right and I had zero responsibility to have fun with it...... I have in the past had coke that just sat in a drawer for months. Just no huge desire to snort it up.

 

Now it might be fun to chase the pig around the yard while high might be a real hoot. But I would do it for recreational use not because I am just bored. Nor would I want to smoke it alone, H doesn't do drugs so I guess I will have to find a friend to get high with some day and chase the pig.

 

Honestly I have been wanting to eat some shrooms for about a year now, but I would not do it every day. Or just out of boredom either.

 

If you are drinking, doing drugs out of boredom there is a problem.

[hotgurl]

See..that's just not nice...I'm not an idiot or a burnt out.

See...3 months....I can go without doing it during the week but I work hard all week and I wanna go out friday nights and have a martini...its that so bad?

 

And its not an addict who speaks like that...its you conservatives who think addicts speak like that. Its spoken from someone who thinks it'll do no harm if done. Just like liquor..I mean yes..it gets you in effed up situations....but Why is alcohol legal...I think its worse...i can operate heavy machinery while high and function totally normally....not if I'm drunk..so why not legalize it?

 

Freedom of speach is only ok as long as everyone agrees....

 

This is BS. You should never drive while under the influence of boos or pot or other drugs. All that i drive better stoned is just a bunch of *****.

 

Also is pot were legal getting high 4 times a week would indicate a problem.

[Ladywithafan]

Hey I am not anti pot..... I am just not pro pot on a daily basis or even a weekly basis.

 

I would love to have a joint in the house right now that I could smoke when the timing was right and I had zero responsibility to have fun with it...... I have in the past had coke that just sat in a drawer for months. Just no huge desire to snort it up.

 

Now it might be fun to chase the pig around the yard while high might be a real hoot. But I would do it for recreational use not because I am just bored. Nor would I want to smoke it alone, H doesn't do drugs so I guess I will have to find a friend to get high with some day and chase the pig.

 

Honestly I have been wanting to eat some shrooms for about a year now, but I would not do it every day. Or just out of boredom either.

 

If you are drinking, doing drugs out of boredom there is a problem.

 

...Just as long as it's not on that pig feeding farm on Discovery channel...dirty jobs w/MR....I'd be to high & paranoid & the pigs would try me for desert...lol